The worlds first riddle!

You know, the answer can only be given by the power of live example... :wink:

I bet I can derail it more!

Li'l Turtle wrote, "I have nothing to say. So may I add some color?"

A rose would feel the same way, a welcome sight none the less.
Have you met, ?'Yitwail'? I see he hails from, ?'Turtle Island. Although I must urge caution as he has confirmed my long held suspicion that if you come to the notice of ?'the Management' you are sent to Riddles to serve out your sentence.

I speak as a transgressor, and am therefore in a position to offer words of advice.

a) The Management are only right 100% of the time. At all other times they are venerable.
b) Big ?'C' has been wrong, but only when he bets against himself.
c) Sweet ?'J' may have a weakness for chocolate sprinkles.

Therefore, walk that green mile and hope for parole.

Turtlette wrote, "Try, where the haverhill have you been?"

Not swimming at the spring at French Pond that's for sure. Francis got to the sun bed first.

"I bet I can derail it more!"

Go baby go! Kinda reminds me of the joke:

There once was five year old boy who enjoyed playing with his train set. One afternoon, his mother happened to be standing by the door listening to the boy play. She was shocked when she heard him saying,
"All right, all of you son of a bitches who want to get on the train, get on train. And all of you son of a bitches who want to get off the train, get off the train. And all of you son of a bitches who want to change seats, change seats now 'cause the train's getting ready to leave. Whoo whooooo."

The mother was just devastated, so she scolded her son and said to him,
"Now son, I want to go upstairs and take your nap, and when you get up, you can't play with your train set for two hours."

So the boy took his nap and didn't even mention his train set for two hours. After the two hours were up, the boy asked his mom if he could play with his train set again. She said yes, and asked him if he understood why he was punished. He nodded his head yes, and off he went. The mother stood by door to listen to what her son would say.

The boy sat down to his train set and calmly said, "Whoo whoooooo. All of you ladies and gentlemen who want to get on the train, get on the train. All of you ladies and gentlemen who want to get off the train, get off the train. And all you son of a bitches who are pissed 'cause the train is two hours late, go talk to the bitch in the kitchen.

South Park humor. I love it!


"Anyone care to leave a...tip?"

Sure, ?'wet birds never fly at night' :wink:

Try wrote:

"... ?'wet birds never fly at night' ..."

Wet birds don't like flying during daytime either. I'm on my own if it rains...sort of.

Yitwail:

Light as a feather, there is nothing in it;
the strongest man can't hold it
for long. Although we all need it.

"Breath"

?'What is the largest object ever found in the LA sewer system?'

Francis:
A motorcycle.

?'What is the largest number of children born to one woman?'

Russian woman had 69 children. ((16 SETS OF TWINS, 7 SETS OF TRIPLETS, AND 4 SETS OF QUADRUPLETS)


Turtlette wrote, "I just had to be patient."

Wot! Are you a doctor?

"I'm on my own if it rains"

Wot! I was talking about the ?'Yard Byrds', "It ain't gonna rain on me"



What do you call the plastic things at the end of your shoelaces

How many children does Mia Farrow have

Where do 6% of US television watchers find their missing remote control

What is ?'Barbie's' full name


In a tunnel of darkness lies a beast of iron.
It can only attack when pulled back.

I am


Little Nancy Netticoat
In a white petticoat
and a red nose,
The longer she stands,
the shorter she grows.

I am

In a tunnel of darkness lies a beat of iron.
It can only attack when pulled back.

It is a bullet.




Little Nancy Netticoat
In a white petticoat
and a red nose,
The longer she stands,
the shorter she grows.


a candle


btw to answer your riddle before

What gets harder to catch the faster you run?
Breath

Man walks over, man walks under,
in times of war he burns asunder.
Bridge

"Russian woman had 69 children. ((16 SETS OF TWINS, 7 SETS OF TRIPLETS, AND 4 SETS OF QUADRUPLETS)" I think my uterus just collapsed! That's alotta kid's!


Turtlette wrote, "I just had to be patient."

"Wot! Are you a doctor?"

No, I'm the patient. Are you going to listen to me or not?!


"It ain't gonna rain on me"

Ooooh, is that riiiight <rolls up sleeves>


"What do you call the plastic thing at the end of your shoelaces?"

I call it...~The plastic thing at the end of my shoelaces, but I'll bet that's not the answer you're looking for.

"How many children does Mia Farrow have"

Touchy subject. That was poor of me, but I wasn't the one who thought of the question. <snicker>

"... remote control"

In between the couch cushions?

Try, are you a ------>Propeller Head?

Traits of a *Propeller Head*

He may retaliate with e mail bombing, anonymous spamming, electronic stalking and other techie mischief.

Lama/cheetah:

In a tunnel of darkness lies a beat of iron.
It can only attack when pulled back.

It is a bullet.




Little Nancy Netticoat
In a white petticoat
and a red nose,
The longer she stands,
the shorter she grows.


a candle



What gets harder to catch the faster you run?
Breath

Man walks over, man walks under,
in times of war he burns asunder.
Bridge

Damn, you're good.



Li'l Turtle wrote, "No, I'm the patient"

Sorry, I thought you said. ?'you were a patent' Unique!

"What do you call the plastic thing at the end of your shoelaces?"

I call it...~The plastic thing at the end of my shoelaces, but I'll bet that's not the answer you're looking for.

Good bet.


"... remote control"

In between the couch cushions? Good guess, but wrong room. Try the kitchen.

Try, are you a ------>Propeller Head?

Traits of a *Propeller Head*

"He may retaliate with e mail bombing, anonymous spamming, electronic stalking and other techie mischief."


What I know about computers you could write on the back of a postage stamp, and still have enough room to write out the constitution. You know more than I do. I can't even post pictures, so I think you are safe.



What is the common name to three Scottish Kings, eight Popes and three Tsars of Russia

What is the name for a triangle with two sides the same and two angles the same

How many millilitres are there in one cubic centimetre

Which body of people are sometimes referred to as ?'The forth estate'


My life can be measured in hours,
I serve by being devoured.
Thin, I am quick
Fat, I am slow
Wind is my foe.

I am


What is bought by the yard and worn by the foot


I have legs but walk not
A strong back but work not
Two good arms but reach not
A seat but sit and tarry not

I am

Try wrote:

"What I know about computers you could write on the back of a postage stamp, and still have enough room to write out the constitution." .... me too, but somehow I manage.

It's raining here again, should I ask God to make it stop?

It stopped raining right after I hit submit, there is a slight mist. Can't have everything!

Which body of people are sometimes referred to as ?'The forth estate'

members of the press who misspell or mistype, unless you meant fourth estate. ;-)

My life can be measured in hours,
I serve by being devoured.
Thin, I am quick
Fat, I am slow
Wind is my foe.

I am

a candle

What is bought by the yard and worn by the foot

rugs/carpet

I have legs but walk not
A strong back but work not
Two good arms but reach not
A seat but sit and tarry not

I am

a chair

OMG I've got the typo cops on my tail.

Yit (don't) wail on me wrote, "members of the press who misspell or mistype, unless you meant fourth estate"

What I meant was:
Four men went to play golf one day. Three of them headed to the first tee and the fourth went into the clubhouse to take care of the bill. The three men started talking and bragging about their sons. The first man told the others, "My son is a home builder, and he is so successful that he gave a friend a new home for free."

The second man said, "My son is a car salesman, and now owns a multi-line dealership. He's so successful that he gave a friend a new Mercedes, fully loaded.

The third man , not wanting to be outdone, bragged, "My son is a stockbroker, and he's doing so well that he gave his friend an entire portfolio."

The fourth man joined them at the tee after a few minutes of taking care of business. The first man mentioned, "We are just talking about our sons. How is yours doing?"

The fourth man replied, "Well, my son is gay and a go-go dancer at a gay bar." The other three men grew silent as he continued, "I'm not totally thrilled about the dancing job, but he must be doing well. His last three boyfriends gave him a house, and brand new Mercedes, and a stock portfolio." :wink:


You Brits do make I laugh!

"You Brits do make I laugh"

Me too! I surely need a good laugh every now and then.

small square 9*9 = 81, 9*4 = 36
large square 18*18 = 324, 18*4 = 72
324-81 = 243

Hello from West Yellowstone.

hope you were using the word 'tail' figuratively, Ta.

Mark wrote, "Hello from West Yellowstone."

I hope you and your family are enjoying yourselves. If you are feeling chilly, don't worry the temp is going up to 70f. Give my regards to any old geezers you see.

What does a 500-pound bear eat? …Anything it wants.

I hear Turtlette keeps animals. I have seen her, but I have not seen her bear.

Have a good time and keep the hell away from here.

Waylon me wrote, "hope you were using the word 'tail' figuratively,"

Errors have been made. Others will be blamed. I started out with nothing & still have most of it left. I plead contemporary insanity. Chaos, panic, & disorder - my work here is done.

Now how do I set a laser printer to stun?

What is the common name to three Scottish Kings, eight Popes and three Tsars of Russia?

I am betting it is Alexander



What is the name for a triangle with two sides the same and two angles the same?

Isosceles triangle?


How many millilitres are there in one cubic centimetre?

Eerrrrrm, ummmm uhhhhh one?

Yitwail:


members of the press who misspell or mistype, unless you meant fourth estate.

My life can be measured in hours,
I serve by being devoured.
Thin, I am quick
Fat, I am slow
Wind is my foe.

I am?

a candle

What is bought by the yard and worn by the foot ?

rugs/carpet

I have legs but walk not
A strong back but work not
Two good arms but reach not
A seat but sit and tarry not

I am?

a chair



Iamacheater:


What is the common name to three Scottish Kings, eight Popes and three Tsars of Russia?

I am betting it is Alexander



What is the name for a triangle with two sides the same and two angles the same?

Isosceles triangle


How many millilitres are there in one cubic centimetre?

Eerrrrrm, ummmm uhhhhh one


Enough, enough already with all the answers. I think these will put a stop to this.





A ship is twice as old as the ship's boiler was when the ship was as old as the boiler is.

What is the ratio of the boiler's age to the ship's age



Using eight eights and addition only, can you make 1000


Can you take four 7's and arrange them with any math symbols needed to make the total be 100



A large fresh water reservoir has two types of drainage system. Small pipes and large pipes. 6 large pipes, on their own, can drain the reservoir in 12 hours. 6 small pipes, on their own, can drain the reservoir in 18 hours.

How long will 6 large pipes and 6 small pipes take to drain the reservoir

Mark wrote, "Hello from West Yellowstone." Hello! is right, couldn't keep away could you?! I wonder how the beers are treating him.

Wait a minute, he is getting a signal from Yellowstone? If I find out he strapped a home made tinfoil antenna onto a bears head and then scared him up a tree and is now holding him hostage...someone give that boy a raise, fine job young man, bravo!

Try wrote:

"Now how do I set a laser printer to stun?"

Want me to show you how? What mark said.

"Enough, enough already with all the answers...'I'.

Alright already, keep your pants on!...well, you don't have to Mr. "6 large pipes!" or is it "6 small pipes"? <i snicker> That's your new indian name. Which one fits better?

Try wrote:

"...my work here is done."


I write...NOT! Who is going to keep me in line? Huh? Tryagain, you can check out, but you can never leave, ..like me.

What do we have to do to keep you? Would a squillion dollar raise do it?

How about...all the tea in China? There's a little food for thought to go along with your tea...green tea. (supposed to be good for you)