Married ten times.

A young man married a beautiful woman who had previously divorced 10
husbands. On their wedding night, she told her new husband to 'Please be
gentle; I'm still a virgin'.

'What?' said the puzzled groom. 'How can that be if you've been
married ten times?'

'Well, husband#1 was a Sales Representative; he kept telling me how
great it was going to be.

'Husband # 2 was in Software Services; he was never really sure how
it was supposed to function; but he said he'd look into it and get back with
me.

'Husband # 3 was from Field Services; he said that everything checked
out diagnostically but he just couldn't get the system up.

'Husband # 4 was in Telemarketing; even though he knew he had the
order, he didn't know when he would be able to deliver.

'Husband # 5 was an Engineer, he understood the basic process but he
wanted three years to research, implement, and design a new state of the-art
method.

'Husband #6 was from Administration; he thought he knew how but he
wasn't sure whether it was his job or not.

'Husband # 7 was in Marketing; although he had a product, he was
never sure how to position it.

'Husband # 8 was a Psychiatrist; all he did was talk about it.

'Husband # 9 was a Gynecologist; all he did was look at it.

'Husband # 10 was a Stamp Collector; all he ever did was...........
God I miss him.

'But now that I've married you, I'm so excited'.

'Wonderful', said the husband, 'but why?

'You're a Democrat'..

This time I KNOW I'M gonna get SCREWED.'