No Speakah The English

And another one.



Subject: FW: Spanish Resume
Importance: High


OBJECTED:
Juan day (maybe after dis job) I wanna opin a Day Kare in mine own apartment for teng kidz.

SKELLZ:
I wash my sisters kidz wheng she goes to de dancing at 'Latin Quarta', I shange the kidz pamperz, misk de milk and shocolate Quick in da botella whilg I wash de novelas at de saing tine.

EJUCACION:
I grajuaded from fif grade. Deng I grajuated from aighf grade. Deng I learned alot from my tia Juana, she let me quit skool so she cood show me to babysit my cozins, Juan, Pito, Tito,Flaco, Papo, Chavela, Chavelo, and Yvette (pobrecita, she dunt even nose who her papi iz!!!)

WORK ESPERIENCE:
Wheng I got tired of babysittin, I woked in a fabrica sowing and stealing dresses.
Reason for leabing: My jefe Hector, tried to hit on me and his lady 'Luz Maria' caught himg.
Deng I got anofa jub at B.I.M. storez , i wuz eng charge of foldeng de genes.
Reason for leabing: Tio Juan died in my other country and I hadda go to de funeraria. I din't no him, but I hadda go ova dare, you know, for mortal support and all dat. So anywhey, my jefe got mad and fired me. Deng I stayed home and sold 'Avon' cosmeticos. I hadda to quik becose I orderd too mucho stuff for my familia and dey didng paid. So weng 'Avon' axed me furr de monee I didng hab it.

My last jub was at "Mi Baby Papi Chulo Day Care" I wached all the kidz for all the moders who hadda get on welfel.

REFERENCES:
Jus call the payfon ecross de estreet and ask anywung ebout MARIA LA LOCA, eberyone know me and dey tell ju all ebout mee.

and another.

Mexican Earthquake

A big earthquake with the strength of 8.1 on the
Richter scale has hit Mexico .

Two million Mexicans have died and over a million are
injured. The country is totally ruined and the
government doesn't know where to start with asking for
help to rebuild.

The rest of the world is in shock.

Canada is sending troopers to help the Mexican army
control the riots.

Saudi Arabia is sending oil.

Other Latin American countries are sending supplies.

The European community (except France ) is sending food
and money.

President Bush, not to be outdone, is sending two million replacement mexicans!!

God Bless America

Quote -"President Bush, not to be outdone, is sending two million replacement mexicans!!"
I might support that relief effort !

Subject: Mexican boy



A little Mexican boy goes into the kitchen where his mom Is baking He puts his hand in the flour and wipes it all over his face. "Mom, look, I'm a white boy." His mom slaps him in the face and says, "Go show your father."



He goes to his dad in the living room and says, "Look dad, I'm a white boy." His dad slaps him hard in the face and says, "Go show your grandmother."



The boy goes in his grandmother's room and says, "Mira, abuelita, I'm a white boy." His grandmother slaps him in the face and sends him back to his mother.



His mother says, "See. Did you learn anything from that?"



The boy replies, "Sure did. I have only been white for five minutes and already I don't like Mexicans."