Always a godfather, never a god

Forums: Relationships, Society, Godparents
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... said Gore Vidal.

Are you a godparent?

What is your role in that child's life?

Is it one you take seriously or is it an honorary position?

Do your kids have godparents?

What is their role?

Is it one they take seriously or is it an honorary position?

Is that what you intened when you appointed them godparent?

Just curious!

Thanks!

For the record: Before we were Mo's parents, we were his godparents.

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I am godmother to my 1st cousin's son. He goes to college here in my hometown. I took the role seriously when I stood at the alter holding him in my arms during his christening and I've been a part of his life his whole life.
I've never heard of my steps having godparents so I can only assume there aren't any.

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I'm the godfather (and my wife is the godmother) of a couple of nieces/nephews and children of friends.

It's a) a religious thing (baptism, first communion/confirmation) and b) just giving presents, being an alternative place for holidays etc ... until the age of 18. We take that rather serious.
[The German word for it, Pate resp. Patin roots from the original Latin pater spiritualis/patrinus.]

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@boomerang,

boomerang wrote:

... said Gore Vidal.

Are you a godparent?

What is your role in that child's life?

Is it one you take seriously or is it an honorary position?

Do your kids have godparents?

What is their role?

Is it one they take seriously or is it an honorary position?

Is that what you intened when you appointed them godparent?

Just curious!

Thanks!

For the record: Before we were Mo's parents, we were his godparents.

No. Maybe ten years ago, my friend Don asked me to be one for his daughter. I refused.
Knowing him, he probably had some unpaid labor in mind for me.

It was first explained to me that godparents take over if parents perish,
but I suspect that a more accurate description is a duty to attend to the child's religious education.

I had a godmother until I was 27.
I had agreed to pick her up on the sidewalk in front of her apartment building, on a given Saturday.
I remembered to do it on the following Wednesday.
She got mad and resigned from office, which has remained vacant since then.
(no further applicants for it)

David

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@boomerang,

I am not a godparent.

My kid does not have godparents. She won't ever have GODparents, but we were just talking about the need to make some sort of arrangements for if (knock on wood, etc.) anything happened to both of us. There is nobody obvious right now.

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@sozobe,

sozobe wrote:

I am not a godparent.

My kid does not have godparents. She won't ever have GODparents,

That 's just as well,
because thay QUIT on u.

David

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I'm a godmother to my niece- my sister married a Catholic. I treat her (my godchild) the same as all my other nieces and nephews though. I give them all presents for their birthdays, graduations, etc., and I would want to help any of them in any way if they needed it. She's not any more special to me than any of the others are. And in all honesty, personality wise, I feel closer to her brothers and several of my other nephews.

My husband and I were named potential guardians for one of my sister's kids and my brother's kids. All in all, if anything had happened to either my sister and/or brother and their spouses, I could have ended up with NINE kids - nothing did though, so I've only had my two to raise (although my sister's youngest is eight and my brother's youngest is 13, so I guess I shouldn't speak too soon).

I don't have godparents for my kids. I named my mother and father as guardians in the event that their father or I were unable to care for them - but we've gotten through the years without that need, thank goodness.

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I have a goddaughter who is a daughter to me. I helped to raise her, since her mother was a single mother and had to travel a lot in her jobl I woud keep my goddaughter at my house for up to a week from the time she was five months old and all day in the summer when school was out; my goddaughter now says she had two moms. She is almost 24now and we are still very close

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@mags314772,

That's great mags.

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Thanks all!

Sorry it took so long to get back here -- my computer access is a little spotty right now.

I started thinking about this after reading an article about the book "Council of Dads". The author was diagnosed with a rare form of cancer and not knowing whether he would live or not he began reviewing his life with an eye towards finding role models for his daughter.

One thing from the article that hit close to home, fo me, was about how hard it is to maintain adult, non-kid related friendships when you're parenting young children. And, as such, it can be very difficult to have people who would be able to transmit (not the right word but I can't think of another) your "self" to your kid(s).

What maggs describes sounds like the role of a godparent to me. I think that's how it was for us and Mo and Mo's other mom.

I suppose I define "god" in a pretty broad way so I don't get bogged down by the "god" part of "godparent". I don't see it as a necessarily spiritual role -- as someone who would teach your kid about God -- and more as a role to teach your kid about how you believed a person should live in the world. Someone who could say "Your mom would have said/done _________" and they'd be right.

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@boomerang,

boomerang wrote:

Thanks all!

Sorry it took so long to get back here -- my computer access is a little spotty right now.

I started thinking about this after reading an article about the book "Council of Dads". The author was diagnosed with a rare form of cancer and not knowing whether he would live or not he began reviewing his life with an eye towards finding role models for his daughter.

One thing from the article that hit close to home, fo me, was about how hard it is to maintain adult, non-kid related friendships when you're parenting young children. And, as such, it can be very difficult to have people who would be able to transmit (not the right word but I can't think of another) your "self" to your kid(s).

What maggs describes sounds like the role of a godparent to me. I think that's how it was for us and Mo and Mo's other mom.

I suppose I define "god" in a pretty broad way so I don't get bogged down by the "god" part of "godparent". I don't see it as a necessarily spiritual role -- as someone who would teach your kid about God -- and more as a role to teach your kid about how you believed a person should live in the world. Someone who could say "Your mom would have said/done _________" and they'd be right.

In order to be effective,
such a person woud need the CONFIDENCE of the child.
Without that, his advice woud have as much value attributed to it
as to the wind outside. We are all surrounded by people spouting all varieties of opinions. Snakeoil salesmen.

Does Mo respect your judgment? or is he skeptical ?

David

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Always a godfather, never a god

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