Slow Leema Orangutan, Trafeep Booga Yow? Poog! Poog!

Slow Leema Orangutan, Trafeep Booga Yow? Poog! Poog!
Mark Morford

Southern drawls have thwarted voice recognition equipment used by the Shreveport Police Department to route non-emergency calls. The voice-recognition system asked people to name the person or department they wanted. More often than not, the system just didn't understand, and they wound up at the wrong place, holding the phone to their heads and saying to themselves, "Loopa Hey Ping Ping Whooooo? Neballum Heayo Zodzod!" and then banging their heads against formica countertops until the cat screamed.

"In Louisiana, we have a problem with Southern drawl and what I call lazy mouth," said Capt. John Dunn. "Which is similar but not quite as debilitatingly ugly as what they have in most of Texas and in the entirety of the GOP and in the Catholic church and in the faux-person you have named Shannen Doherty, which I call 'evil constipated id.'"

A new phone system has been installed which asks callers to scream at a certain pitch in order to be transferred to the Parking Enforcement Department, thus informing police that the trunk of a car they have towed recently probably contains the family crocodile.

http://sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/n/a/2003/11/16/national1938EST0578.DTL&nl=fix