I guess this is a joke...

...but some don't seem so funny. "Much truth is spoken in jest."

(If this has already been posted, sorry).

Subject: Headlines in 2036


> Ozone from electric cars kills millions in world's seventh largest
country,
> California.
>
> White minorities still trying to have English recognized as California's
> third language.
>
> Spotted Owl plague threatens northwestern United States crops & livestock.
>
> Baby conceived naturally.... Scientists stumped.
>
> Authentic year 2000 "chad" sells at Sotheby's for $4.6 million.
>
> Last remaining Fundamentalist Muslim dies in the American Territory of the
> Middle East (formerly known as Iran, Afghanistan, Syria, and Lebanon.)
>
> Iraq still closed off; physicists estimate it will take at least ten more
> years before radioactivity decreases to safe levels.
>
> Castro finally dies at age 112; Cuban cigars can now be imported legally,
> but President Chelsea Clinton has banned all smoking.
>
> George Z. Bush says he will run for President in 2036.
>
> Postal Service raises price of first class stamp to $7.89 and reduces mail
> delivery to Wednesday only.
>
> 35 year study: diet and exercise is the key to weight loss.
>
> Massachusetts executes last remaining conservative.
>
> Supreme Court rules punishment of criminals violates their civil rights.
>
> Upcoming NFL draft likely to focus on use of mutants.
>
> Average height of NBA players now nine feet, seven inches.
>
> Microsoft announces it has perfected its newest version of Windows so it
> crashes BEFORE installation is completed.
>
> New federal law requires that all nail clippers, screwdrivers, fly
> swatters, and rolled up newspapers must be registered by January 2036.
>
> Congress authorizes direct deposit of illegal contributions to campaign
> accounts.
>
> Capitol Hill intern indicted for refusing to have sex with congressman.
>
> IRS sets lowest tax rate at 75%
>