SPINSTER'S LAST WILL

An elderly spinster called a lawyer's office, and told the
receptionist she wanted to see a lawyer about having a
will prepared.
The receptionist suggested they set up an office appointment
for a convenient time for the spinster to come into the office.

The spinster replied, "You must understand, I've lived alone
all my life, I rarely see anyone, and I don't like to go out.
Would it be possible for the lawyer to come to my house?"

The receptionist checked with the attorney; who agreed, and
he went to the spinster's home for the meeting, to discuss
her estate and the will.

The lawyer's first question was. "Would you please tell me
what you have in assets, and how you'd like them to be
distributed under your will?"

She replied, "Besides the furniture and accessories you see
here, I have $100,000 in my savings account at the bank."

The lawyer asked, "How would you like the $100,000 distributed?"

The spinster said, "As I have told you, I've lived a reclusive
life, people have hardly noticed me, so I'd like to spend
$95,000 on my funeral."

The lawyer remarked, "Well, for $95,000, you will be able
to have a funeral that will certainly be noticed, and will
leave a lasting impression!"

"But tell me," he continued, "What would you like to do with
the remaining $5,000?"

The spinster replied, "I've never married, I've lived alone
almost my entire life, and, in fact, I've never slept with a
man. Before I die, I'd like to use the $5,000 to arrange
for a man to sleep with me."

"This is a very unusual request," the lawyer said, "But I'll see
what I can do, and get back with you."

That evening the lawyer was at home telling his wife about
the eccentric old spinster, and her weird request.

After thinking about how much she could do around the house
with $5,000; with a bit of coaxing, she got her husband to
agree to provide the service himself.

The next morning she drove him to the spinster's house, and
waited while he went into the house. She waited for over
an hour, but her husband didn't come out. So she blew the
car horn. Shortly, the upstairs bedroom window opened,
the lawyer stuck his head out and yelled,

"Pick me up in a couple of days!
she's going to let the County bury her!"