8
   

Is your little girl in a Dance Recital?

 
 
Linkat
 
Reply Thu 20 May, 2010 01:50 pm
I had heard about this dance contest with little girls and everyone was saying how inappropriate it was... see this for the video

http://abcnews.go.com/GMA/Parenting/girl-single-ladies-dance-sparks-controversy-internet/story?id=10644648&page=

I know the parents say that the girls got this from the Chipmunks movie - but honestly it is hard for me to watch - maybe if they had different costumes on. How many of you have little girls in dance recitals? Are they all a bit risque like this?

All I can say, is I am glad my girls prefer soccer, softball and basketball.
  • Topic Stats
  • Top Replies
  • Link to this Topic
Type: Discussion • Score: 8 • Views: 7,994 • Replies: 27
No top replies

 
George
 
  1  
Reply Thu 20 May, 2010 02:04 pm
@Linkat,
We went through the dance recital thing with Hermione when she was
little.

I thought it was a big rip-off. The dance recital went for well over an hour,
but each class only had a couple of minutes. The costumes were tacky and
over-priced (but not risque).

After a year (or two?) we transferred her to a ballet school whose recitals
were just demonstrations of what they were doing in class and they wore
the leotard and little skirt thingie. Much better.

Linkat
 
  1  
Reply Thu 20 May, 2010 02:10 pm
@George,
We went through only one year - my oldest wanted to go to dance. So I signed her up at the closest dance studio. Unfortunately for me (without knowing) it was a hard core dance studio. Fortunately for me, she was only 5 - so her class was fine.

The recital a different matter - more like 2 hours. She was in three performances with two different outfits - also not risque as they were only 5. Overall the older kids danced well - nothing stuck out as risque though - the dance studio tried too hard to make it professional. Little kids had to wear makeup and their hair had to be a certain way it was a bit much.

She had fun - but didn't want to do any more.

Thank goodness! Now it is dealing with softball (that is stressful enough).
0 Replies
 
sozobe
 
  1  
Reply Thu 20 May, 2010 02:49 pm
@Linkat,
Yikes!

I thought the title on the video was annoying too though -- "TOO YOUNG TO BE SO SEXY?" If "be" was replaced with "act" it wouldn't bother me as much, but it is saying that they are sexy, which is icky when applied to 8-yr-old girls.

I get how actual dance talent is being displayed though, and also the distress of the parents as it went viral. I actually worried for a minute before the thing downloaded that it was going to be from our community talent show, where some little girls danced to "Single Ladies." That one was way different though. Much more coverage on the costumes for one, and some cherry-picking of dance moves from the video (more athletic, less suggestive).

This community talent show does have some questionable stuff each year though. Last year it was some little girls doing a routine to "Fabulous" (from H.S. Musical) in bathing suits and feather boas. They clearly were clueless about various implications of what they were doing, just were acting "grown-up" and "cool."

Sozlet participates in that talent show too but usually takes part in some big production number with no particular hip-shaking, and low-key costumes. (Jeans + t-shirts of a certain color are frequent "costumes.")

She's doing ballet again after a several-year hiatus (did it in preschool, just started again this year), will be doing a demo, as George describes. Leotards, tights, ballet shoes, skirts, flowers in hair. That's it. And a lot of genteel ballet stuff. (Plie, releve, etc.)
Linkat
 
  1  
Reply Thu 20 May, 2010 02:57 pm
@sozobe,
I agree - the kids are dancing and doing the motions they are taught. I can't imagine at their age it is anything sexual (on their part) - they can't understand the "sexy" part of it. Just plain inappropriate to have kids dancing and dressed that way for some sicko to enjoy.

I was listening to this on radio this morning - and some one called in that owns a dance studio and stated how difficult it is to pick costumes as they are getting more or more risque and also the music - they have a difficult time getting certain things cut out of the lyrics.

Its that thin line that you have to keep from crossing. Allowing kids to dance/act/etc. but age appropriate and still have fun.
djjd62
 
  1  
Reply Thu 20 May, 2010 03:01 pm
@Linkat,
i was pretty saddened by the video, i could probably just say meh to most of it, but the move were the girls bring their hands up to push against non existent boobs is just tacky, and saying, "my child doesn't watch music videos, they saw it on the chipmunks movie", i'd say it probably wasn't appropriate for the chipmunks producers to film the scene for a kids movie
sozobe
 
  1  
Reply Thu 20 May, 2010 03:04 pm
@Linkat,
Sozlet's watching TV right now and I looked away from the computer to see Demi Lovato doing all kinds of wriggling in a music video -- it does annoy me how this stuff is marketed to kids that age. (WHY must all these teenaged Disney girls wear 5-inch heels? Selena Gomez at the start of her series only wore Converse and such and her dislike of heels was even a plot point, but now she's tripping around in skyscraper heels. Grr.) (And yes I realize if it bothers me it's my responsibility to turn it off, she seems to have good perspective about it though and doesn't watch that much.)
ossobuco
 
  1  
Reply Thu 20 May, 2010 03:05 pm
One of my more out there associates at work explained to me that she had sexual feelings at seven, and, not meaning to be sarcastic, with her I believe it. And no, I don't know if she was abused. I don't think the push toward sexuality re costumes is amusing, as the between time is uniquely interesting in itself and, all things considered, very short.
0 Replies
 
sullyfish6
 
  1  
Reply Thu 20 May, 2010 03:09 pm
The mother claims that this is "the kind of dance you will see in this competition." So shame on the contest promoters for not putting some guidelines on outfits, etc.

My grandaughter dances and we sat thru a grueling recital just last week. Lots of overpriced costumes and many of the younger girls were completely overwhelmed by being on stages, the lights, etc. and forgot all the steps.

In the past, I have felt that some of the outfits were inappropriate, but this year was better. Some outfits were made to give the appearance of being skimpy or see-through, though.

By the way, I thought the Beyonce video was over the top, too and inappropriate for the general market to see. Why no outcry then??

Our young girls don't need to be encouraged to shake their booty for an audience.

0 Replies
 
sozobe
 
  1  
Reply Thu 20 May, 2010 03:18 pm
@sozobe,
Ha, I went to find a photo of Demi Lovato (for the people here who don't have tween girls and probably have no idea who she is) and one of the first results for her name was something about the cool shoes she was "rocking" yesterday, check them out:

http://www.disneydreaming.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/05/Demi-Lovato-NYC-Fame-copy.jpg


Now that was on her own time, but they always seem to have those super-high heels on in the shows too.
ossobuco
 
  1  
Reply Thu 20 May, 2010 03:23 pm
@sozobe,
Oh, love a duck!
0 Replies
 
Butrflynet
 
  1  
Reply Thu 20 May, 2010 03:55 pm
@Linkat,
Anyone notice the hot links in that ABC article?

quote from the article:

Quote:
the dancers gyrating on a Los Angeles stage to Beyonce's "All the Single Ladies" were as young as 8.


"dancers gyrating" is hot linked to a story titled Pole Dancing: It's Not Just for Strippers Anymore

"young as 8" is hot linked to a story titled Kid-Sized Condoms: Company Markets Contraceptive for 14-Year-Olds

quote from the article:

Quote:
"Why is this legal?" one viewer wrote.


"Why is this legal?" is hot linked to a story titled The Truth About Teens Sexting


I find the salaciousness of those hot links to innocent word phrases much more derogatory of those young girls than that dance recital video.
0 Replies
 
msolga
 
  1  
Reply Thu 20 May, 2010 09:40 pm
@Linkat,
Ack. That performance sort of made my skin crawl. (Rather like the precocious contestants in Little Miss Sunshine did. <shudder>)

The things adults get little kids to do, in developing their "talent". ...
(And I think the little kids take their lead from the adults that run these "dance academies", etc.)

But then, watching little girls behaving like sickly sweet, simpering little Shirley Temples, for years after the event, wasn't all that wonderful, either. That was pretty gruesome going, too. Wink

I wish these adults, who kids take their direction from, would allow these little girls a little more normalcy, a little more dignity, that's all ...
0 Replies
 
Linkat
 
  1  
Reply Fri 21 May, 2010 08:49 am
@djjd62,
I certainly agree it was appropriate for the chipmunks movie - I can see how it would be cute, but you can improvise in the dance moves to keep it child appropriate.
0 Replies
 
Linkat
 
  1  
Reply Fri 21 May, 2010 08:53 am
@sozobe,
I think it isn't necessarily all bad - it can always be used as a teaching opportunity. Even Selena in her role isn't the best role model. My girls like her - she is pretty of course. But we do discuss her actions - and they realize that this is TV and different than real life. They themselves even say, we wouldn't do that silly move to get out of doing school work or not try hard to do well in school.

It is important for the kids to realize and learn that TV does equate real life and they can enjoy a TV show for what it is - entertainment without modeling it.......but it takes alot of work on the parents' side to do this.
0 Replies
 
Linkat
 
  1  
Reply Fri 21 May, 2010 08:59 am
And I guess these little girls are modeling these behaviors even on the ball field.

Last night I was at my 7 year old's softball game (this is no score everyone gets up to bat as they are 8 and under). A girl on the other team took her softball shirt, tied it up on one side to reveal her belly and waist.

Next inning two other the other girls did as well. And two of them on the field stood chatting, hands on her hips with that teenage defiance look chatting away not paying one little bit of attention (now granted many of the girls in the field get bored and start daydreaming, but most are picking at the grass, chasing butterflies) -

Finally one of the coaches took one of them aside and spoke to them (my guess the coachs' daughter) and she ran off in a huff.
chai2
 
  1  
Reply Fri 21 May, 2010 11:01 am
I have to agree with osso about the sexuality part of it.

I distinctly remember having sexual feelings when I was 5 years old, toward a grown man who was an usher at a wedding, where I was the flower girl.

I'm not saying I had thoughts of his penis or was aware of where my desire was pinpointed. But, I sure as heck wanted him to kiss and hold me, and not just for 1 short kiss or hug. I didn't feel like a full grown woman, but I certainly wasn't feeling like a little girl at all.

I think ALL children have sexual awareness. Not on a level adults understand, but they are not innocent of sexual arousal.
sozobe
 
  1  
Reply Fri 21 May, 2010 11:08 am
@chai2,
That's separate from the presumably adult writer choosing to call 8-yr-olds "sexy," though. That's what bothered me -- an adult viewing a kid sexually.

I do think kids can be sexual beings -- I don't think those girls were trying to get adults to have sex with them when they were dancing.
0 Replies
 
sozobe
 
  1  
Reply Fri 21 May, 2010 11:09 am
@Linkat,
Interesting. Yeah, I know what you mean.
0 Replies
 
aidan
 
  1  
Reply Sat 22 May, 2010 02:45 am
@Linkat,
This reminds me of a discussion I was having with two friends the other day who are both around my age. All of us have daughters.

Ths discussion started around the game of hopscotch. Marlene is Scottish, Lucy is British and I'm American - but we all grew up playing hopscotch. Then Marlene asked about chinese jumprope. We also all played that as well. Then we were talking about cat's cradle- we'd all played that as well- then red rover, statues, etc. The point is that even though we were living in different countries, there was this culture of 'girl games' that we all played to pass the time which involved quite intricate feet and hand movements (in the case of chinese jumprope and cat's cradle) that you had to learn in order to be able to participate.

Do any little girls even play those games anymore? Or is all that gone by the wayside do you think? Lucy's youngest daughter is twelve - so she has the youngest girl out of the three of us and her daughter and friends don't play any of those games.

I think it's so sad that these customs, games, skills (such as sewing, knitting, crocheting) are being lost. Of course it's not the childrens' fault - they're not being taught. Which generation of women stopped teaching and passing down these skills/games/customs to their daughters?

As far as this routine by eight year olds goes - I find it sad. And the fact that the father said, 'It wasn't meant to be seen by millions of people,' says to me that in his heart of hearts this parent who let his daughter participate in this is embarrassed to have people see it. That tells you all you need to know right there.

These kids should be out on the playground playing hopscotch and chinese jump rope.

One's sexuality is a private thing. Jesus - now we even have eight year olds parading it and making it a public event.

I'm so glad I was born and had kids when I did. I wouldn't even want to be in my thirties and raising young kids today.

 

Related Topics

My daughter - Discussion by Seed
acting out or real problem - Question by Bl08791
Tween girls - Discussion by sozobe
Nebraska Safe Haven Law - Discussion by Diest TKO
For Parents - Discussion by shawn1989
 
  1. Forums
  2. » Is your little girl in a Dance Recital?
Copyright © 2024 MadLab, LLC :: Terms of Service :: Privacy Policy :: Page generated in 0.03 seconds on 11/11/2024 at 06:48:47