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mother in law is close to death

 
 
Chumly
 
Reply Mon 22 Feb, 2010 09:39 am
My aging mother in law is close to death. She is in the ICU of the hospital. She has lived a long and full life outliving most of her peers. I have been close to her for more than a decade so I'm already feeling the pending loss. My wife is naturally devastated as they were like buddies for many decades. I know I cannot expect any more for her than a long full life, but still the impending loss is painful and difficult. My wife will grieve all that much more than me and I will be the shoulder she'll cry on.
 
Brandon9000
 
  1  
Reply Mon 22 Feb, 2010 09:49 am
I'm sorry. It's a pity that we're given such a short time on the Earth. Good luck.
0 Replies
 
George
 
  2  
Reply Mon 22 Feb, 2010 09:50 am
This is going to be a tough time for you. I wish you strength.
Beaming positive energy your way.
0 Replies
 
Rockhead
 
  1  
Reply Mon 22 Feb, 2010 10:08 am
@Chumly,
chin up, chum...

(and wear an old shirt.)

take care.
0 Replies
 
Chumly
 
  1  
Reply Mon 22 Feb, 2010 10:09 am
I'm guessing it's going to be ever so much harder on my wife, she is already looking at me with the "WHY DOES THIS HAVE TO HAPPEN?" eyes. The best I can do is comfort her quietly with hugs.
0 Replies
 
DrewDad
 
  1  
Reply Mon 22 Feb, 2010 10:14 am
@Chumly,
Losing a loved one is always rough.

I'm sorry that ya'll are going through this.
0 Replies
 
Joe Nation
 
  1  
Reply Mon 22 Feb, 2010 10:28 am
Your wife is lucky to have you in her life.
Your mother-in-law is lucky to have you in her life.

You have my deepest wishes of sympathy for your loved ones and and you. And the hope that they and you will find peace, in their own time and in their own way.

Joe(~)Nation
0 Replies
 
Chumly
 
  1  
Reply Mon 22 Feb, 2010 11:08 am
At times like this, as silly as it sounds, part of me wishes that a nice, simple, comforting superstition such as an immortal soul was plausible.
0 Replies
 
sullyfish6
 
  1  
Reply Mon 22 Feb, 2010 02:05 pm
Be sure to tell her how much you love her and how great she has been. Even if she's close to death, believe she will hear it.

She is lucky to have you both here to help her on her new journey. That's another thing that will help you - believe that she is moving on to become another energy source. After all energy just doesn't disappear.
0 Replies
 
msolga
 
  1  
Reply Mon 22 Feb, 2010 03:51 pm
@Chumly,
I'm very sorry to hear this, Chumly.
A tough time for both of you, expecially your wife.
But it's good to know, having read about your early family life, that you found such a wonderful surrogate parent later in life.
0 Replies
 
JPB
 
  1  
Reply Mon 22 Feb, 2010 04:24 pm
@Chumly,
I'm very sorry, Chumly. It's hard to watch... knowing what it is you're watching and waiting for. There's no way to make it easier. Accept that it's hard, support your wife as best you can, and come here for a cyber shoulder or two to lean on while you're giving both of yours to your family.
0 Replies
 
Chumly
 
  1  
Reply Mon 22 Feb, 2010 04:57 pm
You are all most kind and appreciated!
0 Replies
 
ehBeth
 
  1  
Reply Mon 22 Feb, 2010 04:59 pm
@Chumly,
I'm sorry to read of this. It is hard to lose someone you love - and often harder (I think) to lose someone you know loves you.

0 Replies
 
CalamityJane
 
  1  
Reply Mon 22 Feb, 2010 05:01 pm
That's hard to watch and I feel for you and your wife, Chumly.
It's so hard to see one's parent being so vulnerable and at the end of their life
and you only can sit there and comfort them and hope that you get another day with them.
I wish you all the strength to comfort the both of you.
jespah
 
  1  
Reply Mon 22 Feb, 2010 05:05 pm
@CalamityJane,
I wish peace to you and yours.
0 Replies
 
edgarblythe
 
  1  
Reply Mon 22 Feb, 2010 05:28 pm
Condolences, chumly.
0 Replies
 
shewolfnm
 
  3  
Reply Mon 22 Feb, 2010 05:46 pm
is she able to speak?

maybe , honestly ask her if there is anything at all she would want at this time.

Then go get it.

I did that for my grandmother ( in law ) one of the only family members I ever loved so much.
I can tell you now, that has been, and was.. the greatest form of comfort ....at least for me. I know it made her world too.

All she wanted was an envelope of photos. Old photos. That was it. And that was everything.
She died 2 days later.

This will not be easy, but I do hope that the grief is swift in its intensity..
ossobuco
 
  1  
Reply Mon 22 Feb, 2010 05:57 pm
I'm sorry, Chumly, and I'm sorry to Mrs. Chum.
Shewolf had a good point there, if she is able to talk.
0 Replies
 
Joeblow
 
  1  
Reply Mon 22 Feb, 2010 05:58 pm
@Chumly,
Kindest regards Chumly.

I'm really glad you have each other.
0 Replies
 
Chumly
 
  1  
Reply Mon 22 Feb, 2010 06:11 pm
@shewolfnm,
She wants ever so much to simply go back home.
 

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