You've talked to a friend about A2K ... they're interested ... ..

I think my initial response was because I felt as though I'd feel less constrained to talk about anything & everything if there wasn't someone who knew me pretty well on board as well. For example, there might be some things I'd be happier not discussing with them ...

Oh my, I completely understand!

I am highly allergic to any real life friends coming here!!!!!


Fortunately, they are too!!! They (if I let drop anything) think this sort of thing is unutterably pathetic.


This is my own private space and I do NOT want worlds colliding!!!!!!!


If your friend goes ahead, can you guys agree to some ground rules re privacy etc.?

How can I put this? There are very close friends. There are friends you have a more casual relationship with. There are work colleagues. There are people you know through organizations you belong to. Then there are people you've "known" online, for years & years. I don't think it's necessary for people in those various groups to cross lines, to "inter-mingle", so to speak. Maybe the nature of these different relationships are fine, just the way they are.

Ah. "Worlds colliding", Deb.
Yes, that's what concerns me, too.

Of course. I don't tell everyone about a2k, because then I could not be so open on here.

A few other things I'd be interested in pursuing, as part of this discussion, if any of you are interested ...

How private do you consider your online involvement to be? Are you comfortable with folk from your "real life" scrutinizing your online activities?

Have you ever felt it was a mistake after a friend has joined an online forum that you're a member of. Why? (I realize there might be folk here who can't answer that question, for obvious reasons.

No, you're not mean-spirited. At least no more mean-spirited as I was when I let family members "friend me" on Facebook. I wasn't comfortabe with my worlds colliding either, and still haven't joined the "A2K" group on Facebook because I'm not overly keen on them finding me here.

That said, nothing uncomfortable has happened yet. And I can handle the occasional question like, "who are all those women writing into your Facebook threads?"


Just give her the URL, invite her to look around, and give me a holler when you get sick of her. I'll hit on her in the sleaziest way I can; maybe that will chase her off again. (Unless she finds this thread first ....)

It's probably way less private than I imagine....but I am likely fairly safe from friends because of the afore-mentioned contempt for this kind of activity.

If and when I do mention able2know, it's because of some of the more innane postings, like kickycan's high drama (I'm still scratching my head over the shower curtain) or bi-polar bear's obessesion with his shlong. Ha. That's enough to keep anyone from even looking into it.

No, I don't want friends on this, it's my world, where I can come and go as I please as well as well as shut it out of my mind when I want. If friends are on it, it's a constant reminder of what? Something imposed on me instead of it being a choice.

Interesting, edgar. I feel pretty much the same. It's not as though I'm all that much different online than in my "real" life. The things I say are probably not all that much different, so I guess there'd be few surprises .... But all the same, the idea makes me feel uncomfortable.

They're ok with rabbits talking to you on Facebook then?

I suppose they disapprove of the rabbits' smoking. It sets a bad example. Otherwise, no problem.

No, the discussion didn't get that far, Deb. I didn't really encourage the idea.

Can you prevent it Msolga?

I can answer this comfortably. I don't belong to any of the social networks. I don't involove family members or friends in any mutual online stuff. My online life is limited mostly because I don't think online socializing is very interesting in the sense of pursuing real life activities. It's a great time filler-upper, though.

One more thing, no it's not mean-spirited of you to not want them to come here. I think all friendship's are a balancing act. That you're feeling uncomfortable for having mentioned it to them says a lot about following your instincts. I wonder if you can somehow drop the subject entirely and maybe they'll forget you ever mentioned it?

Well I didn't actually mention the name of the forum, Deb!

I was talking (with great animation! ) about a topic that was under discussion here, at the time. It's probably a good idea not to mention the name of the forum?

Oh my yes!!!



I keep wanting to demur about where I heard a particular argument, or analysis when I discuss stuff!

I'm interested in this too.

Ooh it's snowing!!!! Sorry just noticed.

Anyway... yes, I remain purposely vague about A2K if it comes up, which is not often. After a surprise run-in with my mom (Abuzz came up and I thought that even if she checked she wouldn't be able to find ME in the haystack -- my username has nothing to do with my real name -- but one of my threads happened to be featured that day and included the fact that I was deaf and the age of my daughter, and she figured it out), I've only written things I'd be comfortable with anyone reading. Which has been kind of annoying really but I'm used to it.