"Dog Whispering" as a parenting style?

Reply Thu 26 Nov, 2009 02:37 am
CalamityJane wrote:

Parents should be parents, period!
I always tell my daughter that I am her mother and not her friend.

She can have tons of friends, but has one mother only.
I can see some possible problems with that.
For instance, I believe that this was the situation between my father and myself.
Undeniably, it was a biological fact that he was my father, but we were not really friends.
Tho we were peaceful, very seldom quarreling: we did not see eye-to-eye; hence,
when he asked me to give him a lift to Idlewild, I was glad to do it.
That was the last that I saw of him, about 45 years ago.
He complained that I took out too much life insurance on him at the airport.
He said: "I am going to make it!" He proved to be right.
I don 't believe that we miss one another.
We have only written to one another around once or 2ice over those years.

I DO miss some friends whom I remember.
I have several elderly women friends who tell of estrangement from their mothers.
Is this disaffection what u have in mind, concerning non-friendship ?
We know from observation that this alienation is a very real possibility.

0 Replies
Reply Fri 27 Nov, 2009 12:44 pm
....you don't know my brother do you?...
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Reply Fri 27 Nov, 2009 06:59 pm
Interesting comment to me, tenderfoot.

I can see need for structure and appropriate discipline at some ages, but the whole idea of some kind of lifelong control - or even short term control on some occasions, though I don't disagree with some elements of that at some intermediate ages - is, to me, fraught. I think much adult rage is out there flying around based on the control issues of parents, and the parents' parents, a hierarchy of control issues or resentment at loss of control... and it leading to a world of adult children roaming about trying to figure out who they are.
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