"The patient seems to not respond to any attempt at communication."
0 Replies
firefly
2
Mon 6 Aug, 2012 09:59 am
Patient's wife requested second opinion. I concur with referring physician. Diagnosis: Dead as a doornail. Treatment: Bury mistake.
0 Replies
firefly
3
Mon 6 Aug, 2012 10:01 am
Patient presents as listless and unresponsive, but reports no complaints. Absence of vital signs warrants full diagnostic workup.
0 Replies
firefly
1
Mon 6 Aug, 2012 10:03 am
Dr Hawkins offset the high costs of his malpractice insurance by combining his practice with a mortuary business.
0 Replies
firefly
4
Mon 6 Aug, 2012 10:15 am
Patient is resting comfortably, no new complaints, condition unchanged since last visit, followup in one month.
0 Replies
nqyringmind
2
Mon 6 Aug, 2012 10:35 am
"Dear Nurse Tammy. We must discuss your employment status when you return from your mani-pedi. Mr. Johnson is not here to end his 'coughin'...he is IN HIS COFFIN!!
"Dear Ebay Seller 'BargainBasementButler', I am writing to request that you reconsider your return policy. The butler you sent is not quite what I had in mind..."
0 Replies
firefly
3
Mon 6 Aug, 2012 11:29 am
Patient's new wife reports he exhibits odd daytime sleeping habits. At night, he engages in rough sex, with much neck biting causing puncture wounds. No abnormalities found. Wife advised to sleep with a cross if his biting is troublesome.
