How does the following quote sound to you grammatically?

Does not sound good at all!

in all candour, you need editorial staff

It's really only the first sentence that's grammatically awkward.
The last three sentences sound okay to my ear, in fact, I kind of like that part of it. I write like that myself - asking myself questions in the text and then answering them. It's a nice change up from same old, same old. Injects a sense of enthusiasm about your subject and the personality of the author is more highlighted - making the whole thing seem more interesting -but you need to check your punctuation.

don't like "without more ado", not clear what you're trying to get at there. I'm also not sure it's factually correct, considering the amount of Japanese-owned property here, and considering the Japanese companies doing business here. Honda, Toyota, Mazda, Subaru, Suzuki, Kawasaki sound familiar?

Or this improvement sounds better? Are there still some problems?

I quite appreciate your comments.

Shouldn't it be 'richest' instead of rich? And shouldn't it be.... The Americans shouted in astonishment "Japan is going to by up America."

Or is that wrong??

Grammatically, both are grammatical.