4
   

Can anyone tell me what is wrong with me?

 
 
egret
 
Reply Fri 27 Mar, 2009 07:24 am
I have been in a really bad state since I left my job. I try to cheer myself up, but every time I failed many job interviews, I cried my heart out. I really don’t know what is wrong with me. Every company appreciated my English skill, but none of them are willing to offer me a chance to learn. They rejected me as I have no enough working experience.

I am a Chinese girl. My last job is an assistant in a British company based in the city where I live. It was my first job. I worked there for eight months till last months. It was really a shame when they ask me to leave. They said they let me go because the economic is really back now. But it was not different from firing me in my mind. I was the youngest employ with least experience in the company. I tried to work hard and get myself experienced in that company, so I asked more responsibilities. Unfortunately my bosses didn’t make any change after my request. They asked me what I would love to do. But I wasn’t really involved in the business (what I did everyday is answering calls, booking tickets and making hotel reservations. That’s not much. So I was bored most of time I was at work)

I started to look for a new job the day I left the company. Unfortunately I got no any good luck. Few company are hiring during the economic fallout, if there are any companies, they are looking for someone with at least 1 or 2 experience. I worked for 8 months, but know almost nothing about business. I didn’t even how to make a quotation as I never did that before.

I am really really frustrated and sad. I am very confused what to do. I am not a sociable girl. I have few activities. I am confused what I can do besides working. I can’t have to cry everyday. My first job failure has given me a huge terrible impact. I can’t get out of sadness. Can anyone tell me what is wrong with me? What I should do?
 
FreeDuck
 
  3  
Reply Fri 27 Mar, 2009 07:52 am
@egret,
Welcome to A2K egret. There is nothing wrong with you. You are beginning your career in a bad economy and in that sense you are like many other young people. The sadness is understandable, especially given that you say that you don't really have any other interests. My advice to you is to find other interests. I know you are concerned about getting a job, but if you concentrate on what interests you you might have better luck finding work.

Did you enjoy just answering the phones? What kind of other responsibilities were you asking for? What was it that you liked about your first job?
egret
 
  1  
Reply Fri 27 Mar, 2009 08:13 am
@FreeDuck,
Thanks for your reply FreeDuck. I had no much idea about what job I could do in the company. There is a marketing girl in the company ( she was the bosses’s friend, who has beening working in other companies for many years. The bosses trusted her much more than her. They even asked her to do assistant jobs, say interpretation or bring her to sign a contract with suppliers. I was really upset when they asked her to do this and that. She is so busy while I as really bored.

At the very beginning, the bosses asked me to do cash, but I refused as I really disliked touch money. I guesses that’s was the worst thing in my career life. I refused to the boss. One of the bosses ever talked to me they would let me take charge of sourcing. But later I found out, they asked the marketing girl. I felt I was underused. They didn’t trust me at all.

I am very confused about myself. My mind was full. I can’t calm myself down to do something else. I have no interest. I spend every day online and sleeping. Don’t now what to do
FreeDuck
 
  2  
Reply Fri 27 Mar, 2009 08:23 am
@egret,
It sounds like you are in a bit of a work funk. This is perfectly normal. I don't know a lot about what it is like to work in China, but in my experience the early stages of beginning a career are always difficult. Many young people have difficulty finding their interests and navigating work responsibilities. I still think the best thing you can do is find something that you like to do. Of course it also helps if you are good at it. What are your strengths? What do you think you offer a potential employer? What did you like to do when you were a child? Do you have any family or friends you can talk to about how you're feeling?
egret
 
  1  
Reply Fri 27 Mar, 2009 08:36 am
@FreeDuck,
I know I am very difficult case. Nobody may be able to help me. I have friends, but not good enough to share my feelings with. I am too introverted an unsociable to have an intimate friend. I have family parents, but they are uneducated. They can’t understand my situation but give me more pressure. I feel I am really tired. Sometime I even have no idea I am living for. I did think of taking my own life. It is really suffering to survive in such a messy world.
FreeDuck
 
  3  
Reply Fri 27 Mar, 2009 09:40 am
@egret,
I'm sorry to hear you feel so alone. It does sound like you are under a lot of pressure to succeed. That sheds some light on why you took the dismissal so personally and why you don't seem to know what to do with yourself without a job. There must be other people in your community who are feeling the same way as you. Do you have any ideas on how you might be able to find these people? I really do feel like you need to connect with other people, whether in your similar situation or not. Get out, walk around, try to find a way to talk to others.

When I was about 19 I got a job as a cocktail waitress. I had been an extremely introverted person before that -- to where I often just didn't speak to people at all if it could be helped. That job really forced me to come out and make an effort, and I learned how to talk to people. It's funny, you wouldn't think that's something people have to learn, but it is. I'm not suggesting you get a job as a cocktail waitress (though there's nothing wrong with that) but you should challenge yourself in this respect. I can't tell you how important it is.
0 Replies
 
Cycloptichorn
 
  1  
Reply Fri 27 Mar, 2009 09:45 am
@egret,
Egret,

When life gets difficult, you have to reach down inside yourself - way down - to that powerful core at the center of your being. Difficulty teaches us how strong we really are.

It is not uncommon to be depressed when things are going bad; you just have to keep trying, and trying...

Do you have an education?

Cheers
Cycloptichorn
0 Replies
 
Linkat
 
  1  
Reply Fri 27 Mar, 2009 10:28 am
I agree with Freeduck. Unfortunately it is just bad luck. It is a bad economy so companies that are hiring can hire those with more experience. It has nothing to do with you. Many people with a good amount of experience have been laid off and are having difficulty finding work.

Like cycloptichorn asked " do you have an education? Do you have the means or some way to get further education or maybe take some classes to improve your skills? I am not sure what sort of things are available to you where you live " are there career counselors available to help you?
0 Replies
 
roger
 
  2  
Reply Fri 27 Mar, 2009 11:58 am
@egret,
egret wrote:

But I wasn’t really involved in the business (what I did everyday is answering calls, booking tickets and making hotel reservations. That’s not much. So I was bored most of time I was at work)


These are the kinds of things that belong on your resume. Leave out the word bored, though. If you haven't been involved in the business, tell them you really, really want to become involved - on your next interview.

You've found a few interview questions that give you problems, like your greatest weakness and best strong point. The other killer question seems to be "Tell us a little about yourself". Work up some answers, and practice till you can give them with a straight face.

Yes, refusing to handle cash was a bad career move. I can think of several reasons not to want to, but refusing new responsibilities just isn't good. This is not something you want to mention at interviews, by the way.
FreeDuck
 
  1  
Reply Fri 27 Mar, 2009 12:07 pm
@roger,
roger wrote:

Yes, refusing to handle cash was a bad career move. I can think of several reasons not to want to, but refusing new responsibilities just isn't good. This is not something you want to mention at interviews, by the way.

Unless the question is "what was one of your biggest mistakes and why was it a mistake?"

Roger gives great advice, as do Cyclop and Linkat. Still, I'm worried about our new friend egret's feelings of isolation.
0 Replies
 
tdbleau
 
  1  
Reply Fri 27 Mar, 2009 01:39 pm
@egret,
Egret, it's not just you suffering from the economic diminish. Don't be sad, try finding something you enjoy that relieves stress, or perhaps go back to school. You're english will improve over time, and experience is hard to find regardless. So don't bring yourself down, it shows in interviews and that could be one reason you're not getting hired. Trying showing confidence.

-Tiffany
0 Replies
 
dlowan
 
  1  
Reply Fri 27 Mar, 2009 04:57 pm
@egret,
Can you tell me what you mean by "couldn't handle money"?
0 Replies
 
 

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