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A Briefing for United Nations' Pact

 
 
Reply Mon 29 Sep, 2003 08:42 am
Hi, I'm trying to write a briefing about UN' Pact. Please check out the below, and correct it to approach the best. Thank you.
(I haven't now checked the url of UN, and of course I've not read the official Pact. I hear the news from another language rather than English. It will be interesting to compare the briefing written by me, or the briefing which has been corrected by you, to the official document(s) -- the Pact(s) published by UN. So, before correcting, please don't read the official document(s) which you can find on the net. Let's try to compare the different versions, and find out the best. Would you like to agree this?)
(The briefing written by me):

Regarding United Nations' Pact for Cracking down Transnationally Organized Crime.

The pact takes effect as of September 29.
That is to say, the pact goes into effect today.

And, United Nations' Pact for Anti-Corruption is now drafting out. The pack will be passed at the end of this year.

We hope the Pacts will help boost the economic, social and cultural development of each member country of United Nations.


By Oristar

(Note: All the content of the briefing is written by me, including the titles of the Pacts)
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Roberta
 
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Reply Mon 29 Sep, 2003 03:00 pm
Regarding THE United Nations' Pact for Cracking DOWN ON TranNSationally Organized Crime.

The pact takes effect as of September 29.
That is to say, the pact goes into effect today.

And, United Nations' Pact for Anti-Corruption is now BEING DRAFTED. The pacT IS EXPECTED TO BE passed at the end of this year.

We hope the pacts will help boost the economic, social and cultural development of each member country of United Nations.

Oristar, You need to check on the exact titles of the pacts. I doubt that the apostrophe following "Nations" is correct.
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Wy
 
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Reply Mon 29 Sep, 2003 08:07 pm
Roberta -- TranNSationally? (Can't find that in my dictionary -- transaCtionally?) I think maybe trans-nationally was meant; would "international crime" or "organized crime operating internationally" be more fluent?

Only other thing I'd do is add an article to the last sentence: "...each member country of THE United Nations."
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oristarA
 
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Reply Mon 29 Sep, 2003 08:52 pm
Hi Roberta and Wy,

I only found "transnational" in my dictionaries. The word means: "Reaching beyond or transcending national boundaries." Transnationally is not there. But I reasoned out it should be existed!
Roberta said that should be "TranNSationally". Sorry I can not find it out in any dictionaries in hand, as Wy did.
And Roberta's corrections -- "being drafted" and "is expected to be" are very fluent and reasonable. And sorry, I carelessly neglected that "on" in the phrase "crack down on".Thanks Roberta.
Wy, sorry I don't know where to add that article. Would you mind to point out the place of the aritcle?
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Roberta
 
  1  
Reply Tue 30 Sep, 2003 02:18 am
We hope the pacts will help boost the economic, social and cultural development of each member country of THE United Nations.

Wy, I agree that transnationally is awkward and a leap from transnational. What about taking out the ly?

Regarding THE United Nations' Pact for Cracking DOWN ON TranNSational Organized Crime.

Two adjectives modifying crime.
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oristarA
 
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Reply Tue 30 Sep, 2003 03:09 am
Hi Roberta,
If taking out the ly, the meaning will be different, I am afraid. As you have indicated, the correction would mean "Two adjectives modifying crime". And thus the original meaning becomes: ...cracking down on transnational crime and organized crime. Apparently it is different to original one. Because there are always some domestically organized crimes in every country, and they are the domestic affairs of its country. unconcerning UN' duty. And UN' duty is to deal with internationally organized crime or tranSNationally organized crime.

Would you like to post the definition of the word "TranNSational" in your dictionary, Roberta? Cos I can't find it out in any dictionaries that I have. Thank you.

PS. Hi Wy, "Organized crime operating internationally" is as the same as the original meaning, while "international crime" is not. Because an inorganized crime can be internationally committed. For example, Mr.John, wore a mask and grabbed bank in N.Y. and then successfully fled to Paris , where he bought 7kg heroins illegally; and then he flied to London to sell it to make big money. All these he did alone, cos he dislikes any criminal organization. Thus his crime can be called "international crime" or "crime operating internationally, not "organized crime operating internationally"
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Wy
 
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Reply Tue 30 Sep, 2003 04:43 pm
transnationally modifies organized, and the phrase transnationally organized modifies crime...

I vote for "organized crime operating internationally"... but there's always more than one way to skin an English cat, and everyone may not agree with me.
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Roberta
 
  1  
Reply Wed 1 Oct, 2003 04:44 am
I agree with Wy that international is a better word here than transnational. I just had a feeling that Oristar preferred transnational.

I also think that Wy's rewrite is better and clearer. However, transnational organized crime doesn't necessarily mean transnational crime and organized crime. Consider organized crime as a collective noun. Hence "transnational" modifies the noun "organized crime." This is similar to saying a good high school. Two adjectives, but one is a part of the collective noun "high school." Oristar, to indicate that both adjectives are modifying the same noun, you could separate the adjectives by a comma. My new, blue sweater. The sweater is new and blue.
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oristarA
 
  1  
Reply Wed 1 Oct, 2003 08:21 am
I have checked out the official title of the pact in UN site. The title is:
The United Nations Convention against Transnational Organized Crime.

Click the link below to check out the news on Sep.29:
http://www.un.org/apps/news/story.asp?NewsID=8389&Cr=organized&Cr1=crime

A thank to Roberta for her reminding us of the collective noun "organized crime". Now we understand the adjective "transnational" modifying the collective noun, not modifying "crime".

Also a thank to Wy for offering thought-out ideas.
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Roberta
 
  1  
Reply Wed 1 Oct, 2003 05:23 pm
Hi Oristar, I'm glad all is now clear. BTW, "thanks" is always plural. You offer thanks to someone. Or you offer a thank you to someone. And you're most welcome.
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