(1)Your birth certificate is an apology from the condom factory. (2)You must've been born on a highway, cause that's where most accidents happen. (3)Shut up, you'll never been the man your mother is. (4)You face looks like somebody lit it on fire and tried to put it out with a fork. (5)You must be the arithmatic man/woman, because you add trouble, subtract pleasure, divide attention, and multiply ignorance. (6)We all sprang from apes, but you didn't spring far enough.
I also do racist jokes and just random situational humor. Just know that if you laugh at any of my racist jokes that you'll be going to hell with me.