A married woman

Forums: Relationships, Work Relationships
Email this Topic • Print this Page

Hi everybody…..

A lady (lets name her sand) at work who never said hi or even look towards me.
We were in different sections; a while ago my department became a part of her section; suddenly she started to smile (unusually)!
Afterwards we met near the elevator:
Sand: Santos why don’t u change ur department to ours!!!
Santos: am specialized in something (which is not related to her department duties).
Sand: smile.
She left the elevator……

OK so far.

Note: she has a girlfriend who invited me ones to a cup of coffee, but I was not interested……..

After while the things that she is responsible of are now one of my responsibilities, so she started to call me, come and check this for me, I need to do this and that………..etc.
And during my visits to her she started to talk about general things, one of the things she mentioned is her husband (I never commented on this issue) and what they do in week ends for their kids and so on, and that she sleeps early and her husband wishes that she stays with him to late hours, and she asked me if I have my own apartment!!!!!!!!!

Another day...
sand called, Santos went to do his job.
Sand: general talking.
Santos: yeah…….
Then
Sand: I don’t love my husband.
Santos: did not say word.
Sand: I don’t love my husband.
Santos: did not say word.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

what to do??????

Topic Stats
Top Replies
Link to this Topic

Type: Discussion • Score: 1 • Views: 950 • Replies: 11

No top replies

@santos-y,

What do you want to do? It seems like you're not interested, so there's no issue for you.

I wouldn't get involved with anyone who's attached to someone else - it's just way too messy.

1 Reply

@santos-y,

Life is complicated enough without this one; leave it alone.

0 Replies

@Mame,

I am interested, but :
sand : I dont love my husband.
.
.
.
.

sand : he is good to me, and he does anything i want.
santos: no comment.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

the reason that i didt comment to is simply I was surprised , shouldv say something, and what ???
if u were me and ur interested, what would u do?

look, what i dont understand is why she is telling me that she doesnot love her husband, and after that she says he is good to me, and he does anything i want. whats the point, this sequence ?????????

plz help in this , I know life is complicated, and it may get messy, but i need some analysis if u could, plz.

thank u .

1 Reply

@santos-y,

get uninterested in her.

1 Reply

@chai2,

i cant get her out of my mind , come on help plz.

0 Replies

Santos, welcome to A2K.

This woman sounds like she's itching to have an affair, but also wants to have your respect so she's hedging her bets. She's unsure what you'd think of her so she's not totally trashing her husband when she talks about him. She also wants to feel, in her mind, that she's being fair to him or at least isn't wiping the floor with him.

In the meantime, she sees you, is attracted and/or sees that you are attracted to her, and is starting to jerk you around.

And that's what it is, I'm sorry to say. It's a classic case of her jerking you around. You may end up sleeping together. You may not. But she's probably not going to leave her husband and I doubt she sees you as anything more than a boy toy.

You say you cannot stop thinking of her, but that's not really true. You can if you try, even if you have to force yourself. I realize it is not easy but any time you think of what could happen, learn to think of other things, and other people. A surefire way to help yourself is to go out with other girls, even if it's purely platonic, and spend time and attention on them. That is, have a life outside of her. That will probably drive her nuts, by the way, if you seem less available and attainable. Right now you look easy to grab, and she's bored and looking for an easy thrill.

Don't be so easy.

0 Replies

Santos, apparently these people aren't telling you what you want to hear, so I will take it upon myself to grab the reins. Take this woman to your apartment as quickly as possible and offer her a glass of wine. After the wine, put on some music, something like Screeching Weasel, and then proceed with the sex.

1 Reply

@gustavratzenhofer,

gus....take me....now....

1 Reply

@chai2,

Married and a co-worker? Are you really dying to mess up your life?

She has you aroused. Fantasies about her are exciting. Thinking about her adds excitment to your day.

Quote:

i cant get her out of my mind , come on help plz.

Because getting involved with her could be disasterous for you, start thinking about her in negative ways. Regard her as if she has a disgusting, easily transmittable sexual disease. Imagine her getting you fired from your job for sexually harrassing her. Imagine her husband coming after you to beat your brains out. Think about anything that will be a turnoff.

When you are with her, talk only about work. If she starts talking about personal matters, abruptly shift the subject back to work--don't let her go on, don't let her keep talking, don't respond to her, don't seem interested. Don't engage in chit chat about anything except work. Don't encourage her to keep calling you to help her with her work. When she calls you and asks for help, mention how busy you are. Keep her waiting, don't go rushing over to help. Encourage her to ask other people for help, or, if you know another co-worker who can help her, send that person over the next time she calls you.

There are zillions of lovely, nice, lusty, unattached women who are dying to meet a nice guy. Don't deprive those needy ladies of a chance to be with you. Look around, find one, and then follow gustavratzenhofer's advice.

1 Reply

@firefly,

In other words, don't let your dick lead you around.

0 Replies

@santos-y,

ur all right, what u wrote is correct 100%, but please stay with me for further development, am gona need that, I will appreciate that.

Thank u all in advanced.

0 Replies

A married woman

Related Topics

Quick Links

My Account

able2know