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An experiment gone horribly wrong

 
 
Reply Sun 21 Sep, 2003 01:19 am
I've been doing a little experimenting in my basement with various types of insects. I've been trying to develop a "guard bug" for my property -- some sort of flying, attacking insect that would keep trespassers and door to door salesmen at bay. I figured by crossing a mosquito with a large predatory bird, such as a falcon or a hawk, I would ultimately end up with the quintessential attack/guard bug. My experiment worked -- or so I thought.

I have created a monster. The "Ratzquito" as I like to call it, turned out to be a bit too dangerous. I developed 14 Ratsquitos. I released them to safeguard my property and they immediately began divebombing and killing my animals, plus a few neighbors were lost in the process. I was forced to grab my shotgun and blast the creatures from the sky.

I killed them all... except one. The biggest, baddest, Ratzquito managed to escape. This creature is capable of reaching diving speeds of 120 mph and will kill you without hesitation.

The bug must be destroyed! If you see it, do your duty.

Our lives depend on it.

Here is what the Ratzquito looks like...


http://www.able2know.com/gallery/albums/userpics/11505/thumb_Mvc-004f%7E3.jpg
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Type: Discussion • Score: 2 • Views: 1,169 • Replies: 16
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Butrflynet
 
  1  
Reply Sun 21 Sep, 2003 01:39 am
If you need any bugs trained in stealth techniques, I think I have just the one for you. For the past few days I've been getting eaten alive by a pesky mosquito inside my house that defies all efforts to detect and destroy. I think the bugger has a cloaking device!
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Monger
 
  1  
Reply Sun 21 Sep, 2003 01:41 am
Montana better be skeeerd!
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gustavratzenhofer
 
  1  
Reply Sun 21 Sep, 2003 01:44 am
hmmmmm... might we be speaking of the same bug?

GET OUT OF THE HOUSE...... NOW!!!!
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Montana
 
  1  
Reply Sun 21 Sep, 2003 01:47 am
Ohhhh Noooo!!!! Gus, I swear that I've seen that thing. It was right outside my house. I'm so scared. What have you done????
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gustavratzenhofer
 
  1  
Reply Sun 21 Sep, 2003 01:54 am
I'm afraid I have opened the gates of hell. The demon has been released and takes flight.

Please forgive me.
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Montana
 
  1  
Reply Sun 21 Sep, 2003 02:00 am
We're gonna have to move. I can't live here anymore with this thing flying around. It could be anywhere.

Ohhh Gus!!!
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Butrflynet
 
  1  
Reply Sun 21 Sep, 2003 02:05 am
ROFLMAO! Gus, you have noooo idea how funny those statements are when next to the photo of the pope. ROFL!

Well done! :::applauds:::

Perhaps we can have a skeetexorcist to rid my house of this flying demon from Hades!
0 Replies
 
Montana
 
  1  
Reply Sun 21 Sep, 2003 02:11 am
Butrflynet
You're so right. I laugh out loud everytime I read Gus's posts and sometimes tears literally roll down my eyes.

Gus
You are one hysterical guy and I sure do enjoy reading your posts so much. I smile even when I see your name and that smile always rolls into a laugh after I read what you have to say. You've given me a lot of needed laughs Mr. Pope and I thank you for that ;-)
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dlowan
 
  1  
Reply Sun 21 Sep, 2003 02:23 am
You shall be laughing out of the other side of your mouth when the ratzenhoffersquito attacks and rends you limb from limb! The man is a fiend - a FIEND!!!!!! Are you mad???!!!!!!
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farmerman
 
  1  
Reply Sun 21 Sep, 2003 05:19 am
can it carry little cluster bombs? If so, we wanna hear from you.
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msolga
 
  1  
Reply Sun 21 Sep, 2003 06:32 am
The solution is obvious, gustavratzenhofer ... now all you need to create a predatory critter capable of destroying the last remaining Ratsquito! Simple, really ...
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dlowan
 
  1  
Reply Sun 21 Sep, 2003 06:38 am
NO! NO!!!! You will destroy us all if you give the mad ratzenhofer such ideas....
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msolga
 
  1  
Reply Sun 21 Sep, 2003 06:43 am
But I so want to see what he could possibly come up with next!
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SealPoet
 
  1  
Reply Sun 21 Sep, 2003 06:47 am
A bat the size of a tennis court!
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msolga
 
  1  
Reply Sun 21 Sep, 2003 06:51 am
Now we're getting somewhere! Twisted Evil
0 Replies
 
Adele
 
  1  
Reply Mon 22 Sep, 2003 05:53 pm
Some of what you have created have imaginably made it to my area of the United States.
We have dubbed these horrific monsters.....Skeeter Eaters.
Unfortunately the first victim was named...what else, but..Skeeter.
We live in constant terror. How do we irradicate these dastardly demons of such unrelentless restlessness? How can we sock in the nose the sickening suckers of stealth?
What have you done. What Have You Done? WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?
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