Is my marriage over?

You need to join your husband WHEREVER he is and the two of you decide if you want to be married.

There's just too much here to deal with.

Sorry, I can't read this. I don't mean to be obnoxious - I just have to break your post down to make it readable for myself, and that might, or might not, help others to respond.



My husband an I met trough the Internet, a website for singles looking for friends/relashionship, from the beginning I did not want to meet with him because I have already met someone the day before, I had a daughter already she was 4 at the time, and a divorce, I owned my house and had a car, I had some debt too in Credit Cards. I wanted to meet someone for emotional support mainly but also needed someone to help me financially,



I did meet with him having some doubts because he was in the Military and I had a feeling that he just wanted me for the weekend or something like that. He sent me pictures of him from 20 years ago and then when I met with him, he did not look the same as his pictures, we went to a restaurant we had dinner and then I brought him to my church, then I told him we could go to a christian club where you can't kiss or hug(to be safe) we went but he kept asking if I wanted to kiss Him and I said no, then he kissed me and then we got kicked out from there we kept kissing and I told him that I wanted Him to stay with me to hug, but people trust me not for sex, he brought to a Hotel and I was almost asleep when I saw him on his underwear, it happend and then the same weekend he propossed to me ???,



I was in shoked I married Him in January with my family and his family not sure about our relationship. We had problems not long after marriage, because he said:" I did not know how to deal with money, he had to pay my debts, engagement ring, etc, he is 40 I'm 28, I am completely in love with him, I got pregnant in 2006 in 2007 he tried to hit me, he was fired from a job and he had a lot of stress, I called de Police on Him, because of the Financial situation and the bad neighborhood we moved over with his mom and my mom my little 7 year old and a baby. It was a complete disaster!!!,



he started drinking heavier then before I was working a lot and I would find Him drinking and holding baby, etc, I was hit and abuse by him several times, until I filed a Police Report, since then he hates me, because he is in the Air Force he worries. He decided to take a training for a year, first he went to Texas by himself, he told I could come with Him, I was scared of him so I did not go, he went out several times bringing his class with him and paying for all of them including girls that are 18-24 years old, well...he always would say that he was by himself liying to me.



I checked his cell phone records and found different phone numbers all guys though. I called one of them and his stories didn't match what my husband was saying. I confronted him, and that one of the nights I called him 15 times and he wouldn't answer the cell phone, by accident the cell phone was turned on and I could hear the club music, he called me at 2:00 a.m. saying that he had sunburn and he couldn't answer the phone, I asked the time he went to bed, he said 8:00 a. m, I told me well at 10:45 I heard music from a club, he said they stayed I came back, of course he is lying to me I can't trust him anymore, I got deppressed and went to the Doctor and Couselor.



I need help from anyone that wants to answer, should I leave Him? before he went to Texas one of the days of abuse he called me stupid and I decided to pick up my friend who is a girl to go out and forget but I lied to Him saying that I was going to work, I had a lot to drink and then I went to a hotel avoiding a DWI , she was texting a friend, we were like sisters. without calling him the next day I came back and one night I told him I went drinking but that nothing happend, he called me slut, etc, well I need help, I did not cheat on him with any girl/guy, but he still thinks I did, what do I do?

I need to think about a response as I'm apt to come up with a short answer - YES, LEAVE, without backup thoughts to support my strong opinion if I post right now.

Your story is not new... Happens all the time.. He will either move out or stay.. You will either move out or stay, either way you will end up the one that will pay the ultimate price, you will accept the responsibility of mother hood and regret ever having met him in the first place.... Then go out into the world and do it all over again. that's life for a woman.

Oh, really?

[quote="ossobuco"]Sorry, I can't read this. I don't mean to be obnoxious - I just have to break your post down to make it readable for myself, and that might, or might not, help others to respond.
[/quote]

Thank you for this...

[quote]
... from the beginning I did not want to meet with him because I have already met someone the day before, [/quote]

That does not sound like a good start...

[quote]... but also needed someone to help me financially,
[/quote]

Nor does this...

[quote]He sent me pictures of him from 20 years ago and then when I met with him, he did not look the same as his pictures,...[/quote]

That did not make you wonder???

[quote]...he kept asking if I wanted to kiss Him and I said no, then he kissed me [/quote]

He ignored your wishes, why did it not end there and then?

[quote]...I told him that I wanted Him to stay with me to hug, but people trust me not for sex, ... it happend and then the same weekend he propossed to me ??? [/quote]

Sounds like a huge mess to me!

[quote]I was in shoked I married Him in January with my family and his family not sure about our relationship. [/quote]

That does not surprise me...

[quote]We had problems not long after marriage, ...
[/quote]

Nor does this, after all, you married a man, who disrespected your wishes on the first date, lied to you, and who you basically did not know at all!

[quote]I am completely in love with him, [/quote]

Woooow, where did that one come from????

[quote]...he tried to hit me, he was fired from a job and he had a lot of stress, I called de Police on Him,[/quote]
[quote] because of the Financial situation and the bad neighborhood we moved over with his mom and my mom my little 7 year old and a baby. It was a complete disaster!!!,[/quote]

It was a disaster from the start, if you ask me.
I am not even going over what happened after this...
Let's make a cut here.

Ask yourself:
What are your feelings for this man???
Do you want to spend the rest of your life with him?
Do you want to give this marriage a chance?
What are your husbands views on the relationship?
Is this the whole story, or is there another side to it?
How are your children dealing with the situation?
What would be the best for them?

Go and talk with your husband.
He is the father of your child, and possibly interested in its well-being, too.
Find out together if you have a chance together.
If you are not willing to give it another try, then make a clean cut.

Better sooner than later!