1
   

Fear mongering: how susceptible are you?

 
 
ehBeth
 
  1  
Reply Wed 25 Jun, 2008 07:21 pm
shewolfnm wrote:
If all pedophiles stopped there.. we parents would not be so uncomfortable.


I posted a link to an article on the 9-year old on subway thread - the author of a new book about raising wimpy kids says the statistics say that children are in more danger for sexual abuse at home than they are outside of the home. It does seem to be borne out in the numbers I could find when I last looked into it.

Two of my good friends locally are child therapists - the majority of their caseloads are related to sexual abuse/assault by family/friends, not strangers - not because it's the caseload they're looking for - but it's what is brought to them by family services/social services/police/courts/doctors.

It doesn't make paedophilia any less of a potential danger - but still ... the most significant risk isn't "out there" somewhere - it's where the kids live. Not the neighbourhood - the home.
0 Replies
 
dyslexia
 
  1  
Reply Wed 25 Jun, 2008 07:25 pm
ehBeth wrote:
shewolfnm wrote:
If all pedophiles stopped there.. we parents would not be so uncomfortable.


I posted a link to an article on the 9-year old on subway thread - the author of a new book about raising wimpy kids says the statistics say that children are in more danger for sexual abuse at home than they are outside of the home. It does seem to be borne out in the numbers I could find when I last looked into it.

Two of my good friends locally are child therapists - the majority of their caseloads are related to sexual abuse/assault by family/friends, not strangers - not because it's the caseload they're looking for - but it's what is brought to them by family services/social services/police/courts/doctors.

It doesn't make paedophilia any less of a potential danger - but still ... the most significant risk isn't "out there" somewhere - it's where the kids live. Not the neighbourhood - the home.
absolutely.
0 Replies
 
boomerang
 
  1  
Reply Wed 25 Jun, 2008 07:33 pm
I completely know that intellectually.

I know that this agrote person could never abuse Mo but I don't even like the thought of him abusing Mo's photo - or any photo of any kid that I had a hand in creating (or, really, for that matter, any other image of any other kid).

I think a lot of the "extra" hits I get are because my site is featured in the "Here is what you can do with our softwear" section of the creation site.

Intellectually I know it's crazy to worry about such things.

I know that two it is crazy to think two idiots in Texas could convince anyone anywhere that owing a gun was necessary.

But I'll bet some people read that story and went out and bought guns.

Remember the thing about how all the kidnap stories were about blonde, white girls? I used to glance at the hair dye aisle to see if there was a run on dark dye. I would look at the people around me. Nobody was dying their hair dark as a reaction to the kidnappings.

But I'll bet some people bought guns.

It's all very strange.
0 Replies
 
shewolfnm
 
  1  
Reply Wed 25 Jun, 2008 07:34 pm
ehBeth wrote:

It doesn't make paedophilia any less of a potential danger - but still ... the most significant risk isn't "out there" somewhere - it's where the kids live. Not the neighbourhood - the home.


I absolutely agree, and I have read those statistics many times. You can find them in almost any family magazine now and it is wonderful to see that people are getting beyond the image of a man dressed in black as the 'stranger'.

The majority of the sexual abuse I had happen to me was from people in my home. ( NOt all family members.. but they were allowed into my home for some reason or another)

And if those kept their thoughts as the limit of what they would do, and stopped acting on those thoughts.. kids would be safer 10 fold
0 Replies
 
ossobuco
 
  1  
Reply Wed 25 Jun, 2008 08:31 pm
Ah, I missed the thread intent.
0 Replies
 
dlowan
 
  1  
Reply Wed 25 Jun, 2008 08:44 pm
ehBeth wrote:
shewolfnm wrote:
If all pedophiles stopped there.. we parents would not be so uncomfortable.


I posted a link to an article on the 9-year old on subway thread - the author of a new book about raising wimpy kids says the statistics say that children are in more danger for sexual abuse at home than they are outside of the home. It does seem to be borne out in the numbers I could find when I last looked into it.

Two of my good friends locally are child therapists - the majority of their caseloads are related to sexual abuse/assault by family/friends, not strangers - not because it's the caseload they're looking for - but it's what is brought to them by family services/social services/police/courts/doctors.

It doesn't make paedophilia any less of a potential danger - but still ... the most significant risk isn't "out there" somewhere - it's where the kids live. Not the neighbourhood - the home.



Sure....BUT...there are, sadly, lots of paedophiles out there who target kids they don't live with. A few with violent assaults where they find opportunity, and many who just hang out where kids are, and form relationships with them, which gradually lead to abuse.

Not that I am saying to imprison your kids.... but kids really need to know safety rules and UNDERSTAND them...the average program purporting to teach kids "protective behaviours" does sweet fanny adams.
0 Replies
 
George
 
  1  
Reply Thu 26 Jun, 2008 09:14 am
sweet fanny adams?
0 Replies
 
Chai
 
  1  
Reply Thu 26 Jun, 2008 09:17 am
George wrote:
sweet fanny adams?



ditto?
0 Replies
 
sozobe
 
  1  
Reply Thu 26 Jun, 2008 09:28 am
:-)

I'm thinking it's akin to "zilch." I like it.


I can't think of any specific cause--> effect fears, though I know there must be some. I tend to write newspaper headlines in my head when I worry about stuff. For example, last night a big storm blew through (one of our cottonwoods was apparently struck by lightning! if so it's just a high-up branch and is most OK though. bark all over the backyard. but I digress) and even after the booming stopped, there was a lot of far-off-lightning making it hard for sozlet to sleep. I put a stuffed animal snake over her eyes and she finally drifted off. I went back to my room and started seeing:

Girl Strangled in Sleep By Stuffed Toy

Webkinz Issues Recall of Stuffed Snake Toys

Columnist: Where is the Personal Responsibility? Blame the Parent, not the Toy



(Note, I didn't think it would come to life and strangle her -- I was worried about slippage and then tossing and turning. She's a toss-and-turner.)

So I crept back in, took off the snake, and replaced it with a sleep mask she'd made for me. It seemed to do the trick.

I often have to battle unrealistic worries.


One of the best tools I have in terms of what I allow sozlet to do is the idea that it is itself protective if a child is intelligent, aware, and confident. Lots of studies about how insecure/ fearful people (both children and adults) make more attractive targets for predators. So if I let her face and overcome challenges, she'll be better able to protect herself -- and I can't always be there to protect her. (I don't even mean when she grows up and goes to college or whatever -- already she goes to camp, goes to school, goes to friends' houses.)
0 Replies
 
Noddy24
 
  1  
Reply Thu 26 Jun, 2008 11:45 am
Wonderful wiki.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fanny_Adams
0 Replies
 
George
 
  1  
Reply Thu 26 Jun, 2008 12:53 pm
dlowan apparently hangs out with a lot of sailors...
0 Replies
 
dlowan
 
  1  
Reply Thu 26 Jun, 2008 04:18 pm
George wrote:
dlowan apparently hangs out with a lot of sailors...


Nope.


I just read a lot.


Not that there's necessarily anything WRONG with sailors.
0 Replies
 
 

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