Business psychobabble

i can't help you - i work in a cube - and thinking outside the box - being creative - it's not standard practice, so they've got to use special words.


multi-tasking means they didn't hire the other 2 people they say they need to help you cover your responsibilities. it means talking on the phone about one file, while you look up a payment on another file, scan a report on a third file, and read at A2K at the same time. And you're reading to keep sane.

Generating bleeding-edge initiatives because that is incentivizing impactful methodologies, on the other hand, meshing plug-and-play applications, targeting web-enabled networks, thusly, enhancing ubiquitous e-business....

(from the BS-o-matic, for the Palm Pilot).

"Prioritize your time." Ya gotta love that Cavfancier.

Incidentally I think every one of the buzzwords have great utility.

Overuse on the part of fools shouldn't reflect on the very words themselves.

cav, In all the years I worked in management, I never personally used those irritable, meaningless, words, although I've heard them during many of the conferences I have attended on management.

Out here in Paradigm Lost, we work hard when we have to and slack off when we don't. Priority is easy, and not just a concept: get the job out, get check in. Within our perimeter parameters we try to have fun.

Craven, straightforward communication is about as utilitarian as you can get, but true, we shouldn't blame the poor words themselves ehBeth is also correct, 'muti-tasking' also involves a cover-up for being understaffed, and not thinking that a single job done well is better than a whole bunch being done half-assed.

I'm taking this a bit out of context, but if someone needs to tell you to 'think outside the box', you should be riding the short bus to work. I've also noticed that people who actually use that phrase are among the least creative people I have ever met.

Frem nawown IM onee talggin lige a NEwifie FIZhermen. Naint no odder kinda ,shavin ever day, watzta smell? Oh ez onnee Basil., e never wazhes ya know"

Dere , owzta fer zum reelworl jergon?
Whenever we "Tink outsida da box, we looze all our riggin"

LOL!! Well, as in Newfoundland, a 'team building' event is just an excuse to get pissed....cept there they call it a kitchen party.

I like heading off to the war-room and talking about going vertical; getting market penetration and product saturation.

wash you mout out bay

Effen i hear "paradigm shift" one more time, i'm agonna go postal . . .

Heh heh..."paradigm shift" = all we's gots is a paradigms, and we need a shift dere....

I work in industrial security (i.e., we provide security systems and equipment for business, industry, government, etc.), and you can bet your bottom dollar that when you hear someone say "paradigm shift," that they haven't a clue what the business is all about (describes far too many salesmen, -women in the business), but understand that "9/11" must have had some effect. Actually, there was little immediate effect, and what it taught technology managers (a security professional responsible for equipment and systems) everywhere was that the resources they had may be underused, misunderstood or neglected. It hasn't had any appreciable effect on our sales, which depend entirely upon our sales department (the two guys who have actually gotten their hands dirty pulling cable and installing devices), and our reputation for high quality, and fast and reliable service.

When i hear jargon of this type, my eyelids begin to get heavy, and i know i'm trapped in a conversation with someone who is trying to convince me that s/he knows what they are talking about, and is lying through their teeth.

Oh, we don't have none o' that in my job!

We just get told - at the same time, but by different bureaucrats - that we must prioritize early intervention by population or by at risk-ness or early signs OR that we are a tertiary service who must focus only on the hardest end and none of that easy-end fiddle faddle OR that we must not have a waiting list so we must offer structured programs aimed at achieving maximum throughput and offer a time-limited service OR that we must be there from birth to 25 engaging meaningfully with the most damaged families AND that we must be centralized and efficient AND that we must offer services wherever and whenever the client group want AND that we must reduce waiting times while offering immediate service to the most urgent and and - but there is little jargon!

Hmm, I'm not sure what's worse....jargon or management who don't have their agendas together...bah, a pox on them both.

None of that? You do mean a different type as oppose to none right?

"projecting, oedipal...."

Back, way back, when I was a lab tech in a research lab, well even when I did the same work in clinical labs, I was surrounded by ticking clocks, four and more at a time. Six minutes to move the sugars... incubate for half hour, shake ten minutes, make phone calls, add sera, times up! Used to smoke then too, and have coffee going. Don't drink the stuff in the beaker! Hurry up!

Nice now to control my own time, and my own words, though lab medicine then wasn't - and landscape architecture now isn't - very burdened by jargon. The art world though...

Nah - I was just kidding.....

(Boy - some of your new avatars are spooky....)