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Can you be perverted behind the door?

 
 
hawkeye10
 
  1  
Reply Fri 25 Apr, 2008 05:29 pm
agrote wrote:
Do you think it's a hangover from religion? People in the UK as well, no matter how secular they are, still seem to have this weird idea that sex has some sort of corrupting power. It's nonsense.


I don't think that you have it right...I think that the problem is the sex shreds the illusion of control and that we are guided primarily by reason. It is for this reason that sex must stay in its assigned place, sexual practice is a threat to our myths.
0 Replies
 
Bi-Polar Bear
 
  1  
Reply Fri 25 Apr, 2008 05:46 pm
perverted? what's perverted? nothing, that's what.
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agrote
 
  1  
Reply Sat 26 Apr, 2008 04:21 am
hawkeye10 wrote:
I think that the problem is the sex shreds the illusion of control and that we are guided primarily by reason. It is for this reason that sex must stay in its assigned place, sexual practice is a threat to our myths.


Could you elaborate?

How does sex shred the illusion of control?
What myths are you referring to?
0 Replies
 
hawkeye10
 
  1  
Reply Sat 26 Apr, 2008 10:32 am
agrote wrote:
hawkeye10 wrote:
I think that the problem is the sex shreds the illusion of control and that we are guided primarily by reason. It is for this reason that sex must stay in its assigned place, sexual practice is a threat to our myths.


Could you elaborate?

How does sex shred the illusion of control?
What myths are you referring to?


Most people have experience with chasing a piece of ass when doing so is clearly not in their best interests, or of giving into a pursuer when they don't think they should or don't want to. We also have experience with repulsive sexual fantasies that we wish that we never had. If we humans were the in control rational beings we imagine ourselves to be this stuff would never happen. Our feelings and behaviours point out that we are not what we think that we are, that our myths about who we are do not always match up with reality.

If we don't repress our sexual desires the old saw "love is divine madness" would become " love and lust are divine madness" There are plenty of moderns who are willing to repress love as well as lust in order to maintain their myths, which is sad. Some repression is necessary in order to maintain social cohesion and order, but we should be aware of the fact that we are doing it, we should know who we are, and what we want. We have taken repression way farther than is in our best interest, and we do this out of fear. We are afraid if our dark sides, and what will happen if we don't cling to our myths about rationality and control.
0 Replies
 
agrote
 
  1  
Reply Sat 26 Apr, 2008 11:05 am
Okay, yeah i think I agree with that.

People complain about the old feminist line that "all men are potential rapists," but as a man, I've always thought that sounds pretty accurate. I suspect that, on some level, most men want to commit rape. On another level, of course, plenty of us think it would be a terrible thing to do, and so we don't. But I think that this moral deliberation has some potent sadistic sexual desires to content with. As abhorrent as it is, rape is still pretty sexy, and I think most men would agree with this after sufficient reflection.
0 Replies
 
hawkeye10
 
  1  
Reply Sat 26 Apr, 2008 11:44 am
agrote wrote:
Okay, yeah i think I agree with that.

People complain about the old feminist line that "all men are potential rapists," but as a man, I've always thought that sounds pretty accurate. I suspect that, on some level, most men want to commit rape. On another level, of course, plenty of us think it would be a terrible thing to do, and so we don't. But I think that this moral deliberation has some potent sadistic sexual desires to content with. As abhorrent as it is, rape is still pretty sexy, and I think most men would agree with this after sufficient reflection.


I am not sure why were are trying to talk about rape again, but you are right except for one thing.....repression runs so deep that most people will not be able to see that rape is part of normal human sexuality. We can talk about how some other species engage in rape, so maybe we will be able to talk about humans at some point.

The current flash point is that our biology and spiritual beliefs (our sense of the erotic) runs right into our ethical and political beliefs. The struggle to resist truths that we don't want to admit or deal with is the main cause of our wacky and unhealthy sexual law, as well as to standards of public behaviour that are completely at odds with who we are. The dam will break, reality will impose itself at some point.

The feminist movement that is trying to impose rape law that denies human reality will in the end pay for it, by spending what little credibility the movement has remaining. Then we will be able to move forward with something else, something that does not pit one half of the species against the other half.
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cyphercat
 
  1  
Reply Sat 26 Apr, 2008 01:10 pm
hawkeye10 wrote:
The feminist movement that is trying to impose rape law that denies human reality will in the end pay for it, by spending what little credibility the movement has remaining. Then we will be able to move forward with something else, something that does not pit one half of the species against the other half.


Would you clarify what this "something else" might be like? You seem to indicate, if I understand correctly, that we should have more permissive laws regarding rape, laws that recognize the male, what, natural inclination to rape, is that about right?

And if I am understanding that correctly, how do you see that as easing relations between the sexes? How would women feel less "pitted against" men if laws about rape were less in denial of "human reality"-- which I can only assume means laws that permit rape in some "natural" circumstances?
0 Replies
 
hawkeye10
 
  1  
Reply Sat 26 Apr, 2008 01:21 pm
cyphercat wrote:
hawkeye10 wrote:
The feminist movement that is trying to impose rape law that denies human reality will in the end pay for it, by spending what little credibility the movement has remaining. Then we will be able to move forward with something else, something that does not pit one half of the species against the other half.


Would you clarify what this "something else" might be like? You seem to indicate, if I understand correctly, that we should have more permissive laws regarding rape, laws that recognize the male, what, natural inclination to rape, is that about right?

And if I am understanding that correctly, how do you see that as easing relations between the sexes? How would women feel less "pitted against" men if laws about rape were less in denial of "human reality"-- which I can only assume means laws that permit rape in some "natural" circumstances?


I assume that it would be something that had as its focus promoting the health of the individual as well as the collective of individuals, instead of being based upon law and ethics. What we call rape would for the most part be considered a personal and public health concern, and would be handled by health care workers, not court and prison workers. Only the mot extreme cases would be put into the justice system. We will have the same change in the way we deal with drugs.

Feminism will die because what is good for men is good for women, and vis-versa. The adversarial relationship does not work, and most people are smart enough to know that hating and trying to control the other gender is an exercise in cutting our own throats. Women will at some point wise-up, and realize that they have no choice but to let men be men. Same goes for men letting women be women. Self acceptance is a good thing, and so is acceptance of the other, and acceptance of the truths of gender differences.
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agrote
 
  1  
Reply Sun 27 Apr, 2008 03:24 am
I'm all for accepting the truth and basing policy on reality. But I don't quite agree with all of your truth-claims.

Feminism doesn't pit one half of the species against the other... that is exactly what it tries to prevent, with some success.

If, as you claim, rape is a normal part of human sexuality, then your idea that "what is good for men is good for women, and vis-versa" seems to fall apart. If it is good for men to rape women, this certainly isn't good for women. And if it is good for women to not get raped, this apparently isn't good for men. Accepting the truths of gender differences seems to entail compromise and co-operation (or mutual control), not letting boys be boys and girls be girls.
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hawkeye10
 
  1  
Reply Sun 27 Apr, 2008 08:41 am
agrote wrote:
I'm all for accepting the truth and basing policy on reality. But I don't quite agree with all of your truth-claims.

Feminism doesn't pit one half of the species against the other... that is exactly what it tries to prevent, with some success.

If, as you claim, rape is a normal part of human sexuality, then your idea that "what is good for men is good for women, and vis-versa" seems to fall apart. If it is good for men to rape women, this certainly isn't good for women. And if it is good for women to not get raped, this apparently isn't good for men. Accepting the truths of gender differences seems to entail compromise and co-operation (or mutual control), not letting boys be boys and girls be girls.


Feminism is one half the species claiming to be victimized by the other half, so you will need to explain to me how a theory that splits the whole into victim and victimizer is not pitting one half against the other. Feminism is a power play by the portion which has self defined as victim against the those that they have defined as victimizer. Luckly, the younger generations mostly reject the construct, have moved past feminism.

I am not ready to concede that rape is not good for females. I have a hard time with the concept of a natural act that is bad for the species surviving evolution. If something is good for the species then it is good for the females of the species, though I don't see how rape is good for the individual female who is raped. I suspect that females that are raped "take one for the team", that their loss is the species gain. The exactly mechanics of this I do not know, maybe rape is intended to reinforce the lesson to females that their role is to give of themselves to life, or maybe it is to make sure that male aggression does not disappear from the gene pool (male aggression being a critical ingredient in the survival of the species)....but however it works I think that rape serves a purpose.

Accepting gender differences means accepting that x is not y and y is not x. x and y must cooperate, but they also must resist the urge to try to force x and y to try to become more like each other, into becoming xy. You don't find many examples of successful species where the individuals show a lot of xy, successful species have strong and independent x and strong and independent y which cooperate. This is probably because this arrangement broadens the base of skills that are at the species disposal, xy can only exist by chopping off on half on the left and one half on the right and then gluing the two surviving halves together. In total one half of the species skill set is discarded during this operation. I think that the majority of women are figuring out that the move to try to force men to be more like women was a bad idea, you now hear a lot of individual women say that they wish they could find a strong masculine male for a partner, but that all they can find are wimps who will not step up to the plate.
0 Replies
 
cyphercat
 
  1  
Reply Sun 27 Apr, 2008 09:26 pm
hawkeye10 wrote:
I am not ready to concede that rape is not good for females.


Oh. My.

That little gem of a quote deserves to be given widespread appreciation, I'm going to give it pride of place in my sig line for a while...
0 Replies
 
cyphercat
 
  1  
Reply Sun 27 Apr, 2008 09:33 pm
No, no, I think I like this even better!

Quote:
maybe rape is intended to reinforce the lesson to females that their role is to give of themselves to life


That one is more poetic. Gosh, now I can't even pick between the two--an embarrassment of riches! Perhaps I'll use both.
0 Replies
 
hawkeye10
 
  1  
Reply Sun 27 Apr, 2008 09:55 pm
cyphercat wrote:
....Oh. My.

That little gem of a quote deserves to be given widespread appreciation, I'm going to give it pride of place in my sig line for a while...

No, no, I think I like this even better!

Quote:
maybe rape is intended to reinforce the lesson to females that their role is to give of themselves to life


That one is more poetic. Gosh, now I can't even pick between the two--an embarrassment of riches! Perhaps I'll use both.


Be my guest, though we have already been able to have a more honest discussion on the subject than is normally culturally allowed. Anything else that you can drum up is gravy.
0 Replies
 
agrote
 
  1  
Reply Mon 28 Apr, 2008 11:33 am
hawkeye10 wrote:
Feminism is one half the species claiming to be victimized by the other half, so you will need to explain to me how a theory that splits the whole into victim and victimizer is not pitting one half against the other.


I disagree with your definition of feminism, so I don't need to explain that. There are plenty of feminist ideas that I wouldn't wish to defend, but as far as I'm aware the idea that women should be able to vote came out of feminism. That's not about victimisation, it's just about inequality. Feminism is about gender equality. Within limits. Obviously there are differences between men and women; gender equality doesn't mean, "breasts and vaginas for everyone!"

Feminists might claim that some men victimise some women, but this is uncontroversial. The rapist victimises the rape victim. Note that making this claim does not pit rapists against rapees. Rapists pit themselves against their victims; feminists just report it.

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Luckly, the younger generations mostly reject the construct, have moved past feminism.


Oh yes, thank god for this wonderful generation of girls who think they have to look like Paris Hilton (i.e. thin, orange and blonde) if they want people to like them.

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I am not ready to concede that rape is not good for females. I have a hard time with the concept of a natural act that is bad for the species surviving evolution.


Evolution is not about the species, it's about the genes. And it's got bugger all to do with ethics. The violent molestation of babies is a natural act. I'm a little uneasy about the whole natural/non-natural distinction anyway. Surely everything that occurs in the natural world is natural?

Quote:
If something is good for the species then it is good for the females of the species, though I don't see how rape is good for the individual female who is raped. I suspect that females that are raped "take one for the team", that their loss is the species gain. The exactly mechanics of this I do not know, maybe rape is intended to reinforce the lesson to females that their role is to give of themselves to life, or maybe it is to make sure that male aggression does not disappear from the gene pool (male aggression being a critical ingredient in the survival of the species)....but however it works I think that rape serves a purpose.


This is a pretty wacky theory. I don't think evolution should be interpreted teleologically. Human hands are good at picking things up, and they have evolved because they are good at picking things up. But they're not for picking things up, unless we decide that they are. There was no creator of the human hand who could bestow on it the function of picking things up. The human hand does not have a purpose unless somebody gives it one. Same goes for rape - it has no natural purpose. We could give it a purpose, but I can't see how this would make us better off.

Quote:
Accepting gender differences means accepting that x is not y and y is not x. x and y must cooperate, but they also must resist the urge to try to force x and y to try to become more like each other, into becoming xy. You don't find many examples of successful species where the individuals show a lot of xy, successful species have strong and independent x and strong and independent y which cooperate. This is probably because this arrangement broadens the base of skills that are at the species disposal, xy can only exist by chopping off on half on the left and one half on the right and then gluing the two surviving halves together. In total one half of the species skill set is discarded during this operation. I think that the majority of women are figuring out that the move to try to force men to be more like women was a bad idea, you now hear a lot of individual women say that they wish they could find a strong masculine male for a partner, but that all they can find are wimps who will not step up to the plate.


This is just too simplistic. There are similarities as well as differences, and you're exaggerating the differences. Some men are less stereotypically masculine because they have lower testosterone levels. That's got nothing to do with female manipulation. And they're not "wimps who will not step up to the plate". What is "the plate" supposed to be? A plate of pork and beans?
0 Replies
 
agrote
 
  1  
Reply Mon 5 May, 2008 12:32 am
No comment?
0 Replies
 
hawkeye10
 
  1  
Reply Mon 5 May, 2008 05:34 pm
Quote:
disagree with your definition of feminism, so I don't need to explain that. There are plenty of feminist ideas that I wouldn't wish to defend, but as far as I'm aware the idea that women should be able to vote came out of feminism. That's not about victimisation, it's just about inequality. Feminism is about gender equality. Within limits. Obviously there are differences between men and women; gender equality doesn't mean, "breasts and vaginas for everyone!"

Feminists might claim that some men victimise some women, but this is uncontroversial. The rapist victimises the rape victim. Note that making this claim does not pit rapists against rapees. Rapists pit themselves against their victims; feminists just report it.


men and women are not the same therefor they can not be equal except on the power level. even here men and women are not the same, we use different forms of power. "equality" sounds good, it sells as a rationale, but it has been tacked on after the fact. Equality is good as a legal abstract, but it has little to doing with the biological, nor with life. happiness, fulfillment, satisfaction are much better goals in a mutual relationship with two or more individuals who are very dissimilar. This striving for equality is the product of childish minds, those who have not lived enough to know better, those who believe in this hokum are easily bamboozled by this power play by the females called feminism

Quote:
This is a pretty wacky theory. I don't think evolution should be interpreted teleologically. Human hands are good at picking things up, and they have evolved because they are good at picking things up. But they're not for picking things up, unless we decide that they are. There was no creator of the human hand who could bestow on it the function of picking things up. The human hand does not have a purpose unless somebody gives it one. Same goes for rape - it has no natural purpose. We could give it a purpose, but I can't see how this would make us better off


You would be hard pressed to find ten people who think that rape serves a purpose, but that does not mean that it does not. The purpose is certainly outside of what our rational mind can comprehend.

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This is just too simplistic. There are similarities as well as differences, and you're exaggerating the differences. Some men are less stereotypically masculine because they have lower testosterone levels. That's got nothing to do with female manipulation. And they're not "wimps who will not step up to the plate". What is "the plate" supposed to be? A plate of pork and beans?

true in a sense, there are individual differences. But as a general truth women have been becoming more like men and men have been becoming more like women. The dance between the polarities of masculine and feminine has been much weakened over the last two generations, and it shows in our personal relationships. The most masculine half of masculinity has been largely discarded, and the most feminine half of femininity has been as well. Human kind is weaker as a result. i can still find some very masculine males, and some very feminine females, but they are now very much the exception rather than the rule.
0 Replies
 
agrote
 
  1  
Reply Tue 6 May, 2008 04:54 am
hawkeye10 wrote:
men and women are not the same therefor they can not be equal except on the power level.


What do you mean "not the same"? Obviously they're not exactly the same. But they are similar enough to be classed as members of the same species. Which is pretty similar really. If chimpanzees share 99% of their DNA with humans, then just think how biologically similar humans must be to their fellow humans of the opposite sex.

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happiness, fulfillment, satisfaction are much better goals in a mutual relationship with two or more individuals who are very dissimilar.


Yes, that may be true.

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This striving for equality is the product of childish minds,


You seem to be reading 'equality' as 'uniformity'. Modern feminists campaign for things like equality of wages and equality of personal safety when leaving the house at night. They don't demand equality of personality.

Quote:
This is a pretty wacky theory. I don't think evolution should be interpreted teleologically. Human hands are good at picking things up, and they have evolved because they are good at picking things up. But they're not for picking things up, unless we decide that they are. There was no creator of the human hand who could bestow on it the function of picking things up. The human hand does not have a purpose unless somebody gives it one. Same goes for rape - it has no natural purpose. We could give it a purpose, but I can't see how this would make us better off


You would be hard pressed to find ten people who think that rape serves a purpose, but that does not mean that it does not.[/quote]

I never claimed otherwise. My claim was that purpose is something which we bestow on things. We have to make it up. Rape doesn't have a purpose just because it exists in the natural world. Unless we give it a purpose, it doesn't have one.

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The purpose is certainly outside of what our rational mind can comprehend.


There are two possible explanations for this:

(1) The purpose of rape is too complicated for us to understand.
(2) Rape has no purpose; we cannot understand the purpose of rape because it doesn't exist.

In the absence of any reason to believe (1), I think I'll bet on (2).

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This is just too simplistic. There are similarities as well as differences, and you're exaggerating the differences. Some men are less stereotypically masculine because they have lower testosterone levels. That's got nothing to do with female manipulation. And they're not "wimps who will not step up to the plate". What is "the plate" supposed to be? A plate of pork and beans?

true in a sense, there are individual differences.


I'm not talking about individual differences. I heard about a study the other day that found that men with square jaws and other masculine features are more likely to agree to a one-night stand, and it's to do with higher testosterone levels. Pointy-chinned men such as myself are less inclined to have brief relationships, and this is to do with lower levels of testoerone. There are plenty of us in the world, and our testosterone levels and the shape of our chins have got nothing to do with women's liberation. No feminist campaign has the power to change the shape of my chin.

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But as a general truth women have been becoming more like men and men have been becoming more like women.


What's the evidence for this?

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Human kind is weaker as a result.


What do you mean weaker? Do you mean less successful in satisfying our needs and leading lives worth living?
0 Replies
 
hawkeye10
 
  1  
Reply Tue 6 May, 2008 05:13 pm
Quote:
What do you mean "not the same"? Obviously they're not exactly the same. But they are similar enough to be classed as members of the same species. Which is pretty similar really. If chimpanzees share 99% of their DNA with humans, then just think how biologically similar humans must be to their fellow humans of the opposite sex.
Men and woman are different. Our brains are different, we process information (especially language) differently, we care about different things for the most part, our social needs are different...and so on and so on

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You seem to be reading 'equality' as 'uniformity'. Modern feminists campaign for things like equality of wages and equality of personal safety when leaving the house at night. They don't demand equality of personality.
I don't think that there have been three people in America since the civil rights era who believe in the concept of separate but equal. if we could bring that concept back then you might have a point....till then equality and uniformity mean the same thing

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I never claimed otherwise. My claim was that purpose is something which we bestow on things. We have to make it up. Rape doesn't have a purpose just because it exists in the natural world. Unless we give it a purpose, it doesn't have one.
If you are going to define purpose as intention of the individual then I agree with you. However, I am a mystic, the spiritual is always with me, I am speaking the intention of our creator, or of the force of life

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Quote:
But as a general truth women have been becoming more like men and men have been becoming more like women.


What's the evidence for this?
conventional wisdom of those who think on such things, as well as my own observations. This is mostly subjective, as science was not interested in such things until recently, there is no old data to compare new data with, thus now way to reach this conclusion (or disprove it) objectively

Quote:
What do you mean weaker? Do you mean less successful in satisfying our needs and leading lives worth living?
we are at increasingly at risk of a mass die-off of the species, and we are increasingly unable to live deeply as individuals. Humanities roots are more shallow then they have been in a very long time,we have these massive technical societies supporting teams of individuals, but the support structure is very weak. Disaster is imminent
0 Replies
 
agrote
 
  1  
Reply Wed 7 May, 2008 03:17 am
hawkeye10 wrote:
If you are going to define purpose as intention of the individual then I agree with you. However, I am a mystic, the spiritual is always with me, I am speaking the intention of our creator, or of the force of life.


In terms of the intention of the individual, or of society (or of a creator). Not as intention. By purpose I mean function, and functions need to be bestowed on things; they don't happen by themselves.

If you believe in a creator who gave us legs for walking, hands for picking things up etc., then I guess you're entitled to believe that rape has a function independently of whether we give it one. And if you're that superstitious I'm probably not going to be able to reason with you.

But you need to think about what the function of rape could possibly be. If you can't work that out, what reason is there to assume that rape has a function? What about violent baby rape - does that have a function?

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Men and woman are different. Our brains are different, we process information (especially language) differently, we care about different things for the most part, our social needs are different...and so on and so on


Why are you insisting on a black and white picture of the world? Men and women are somewhat different, we process information somewhat differently, our social needs are somewhat different. Haven't you ever had a female friend or partner with whom you share some things in common?

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You seem to be reading 'equality' as 'uniformity'. Modern feminists campaign for things like equality of wages and equality of personal safety when leaving the house at night. They don't demand equality of personality.
I don't think that there have been three people in America since the civil rights era who believe in the concept of separate but equal. if we could bring that concept back then you might have a point....till then equality and uniformity mean the same thing


I don't follow this. Americans think that equality is all or nothing, therefore equality is all or nothing? I'm not sure, but I don't think the opinion of the American masses determines what is true.

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Quote:
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But as a general truth women have been becoming more like men and men have been becoming more like women.


What's the evidence for this?
conventional wisdom of those who think on such things, as well as my own observations. This is mostly subjective, as science was not interested in such things until recently, there is no old data to compare new data with, thus now way to reach this conclusion (or disprove it) objectively


If you can't prove or disprove it objectively, why aren't you sitting on the fence and saying "I don't know whether women have become more like men and men more like women"?

If you are basing your view on your own observations, here are my observations in the UK: at night the pubs are dominated by fat, aggressive, beer-drinking males with shaved heads, along with scantily-clad, cocktail-sipping females caked in make-up. The gender roles are quite polarised.

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we are at increasingly at risk of a mass die-off of the species


You're being very vague here. What are you alluding to... global warming? war?

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and we are increasingly unable to live deeply as individuals.


What do you mean "live deeply"? More spiritual stuff?
0 Replies
 
hawkeye10
 
  1  
Reply Wed 7 May, 2008 08:59 pm
Quote:
Why are you insisting on a black and white picture of the world? Men and women are somewhat different, we process information somewhat differently, our social needs are somewhat different. Haven't you ever had a female friend or partner with whom you share some things in common?



A consistent small difference in biology and brain chemistry between the genders leads to some major differences in perception of the same reality. Science has proven this beyond doubt, "men are from Mars, women are from Venus" and all of that ilk have been pointing this out for the last decade. The problem with feminism is that women DAMAND that men adopt their perception....screw that, the male perspective is just as valid as the female. I will not for one second use the claim of female oppression at the hands of males to invalidate male perception. injustices of the past are not my fault, women need to either take that up with my male ancestors in the after life or let it go. injustices claimed to be current and my fault need to be proven to me before i take them seriously.

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I don't follow this. Americans think that equality is all or nothing, therefore equality is all or nothing? I'm not sure, but I don't think the opinion of the American masses determines what is true.

the point is that when feminist talk about equality they are talking about uniformity, and we know this by looking at America's attitude toward the concept of separate but equal. We also know this by America basically making illegal racial and gender specific social organization.

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If you can't prove or disprove it objectively, why aren't you sitting on the fence and saying "I don't know whether women have become more like men and men more like women"?

If you are basing your view on your own observations, here are my observations in the UK: at night the pubs are dominated by fat, aggressive, beer-drinking males with shaved heads, along with scantily-clad, cocktail-sipping females caked in make-up. The gender roles are quite polarised

Ummm, I am a mystic.....I don't share your high appreciation of objective truth over subjective truth.

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What do you mean "live deeply"? More spiritual stuff?
Sure spiritual depth is missing, but so is richness of personality, so is the ability to function independently of the collective (not a slave to fads, the conventional wisdom, the mob mentality), so is the ability and willingness to examine life and humanity
0 Replies
 
 

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