Teen Magazines – Boobs and periods

Well, perhaps this is a good way to section into common terminology for her lady parts.

Tell her the appropriate term and then explain to her that these types of names are not respectful.

I am sure she hears them now and has no doubt about what they are. But she probably doesn't hear the term "breasts" or "vagina" and she should understand that those words are not the dirty ones.

Re: Teen Magazines - Boobs and periods


Why not?

What are they talking about ? Condoms?
The more often she hears about condoms the more she is just going to assume they are a permanent part of sex. But i can absolutely understand not wanting to explain that yet.. but.. what else were they talking about in this magazine? Im curious about how those magazines have changed.

My plan.. ( I still have a few years though..) is to speak of sex as if condoms are mandatory, normal, and always used. That there is no such sex with out a condom.

Using words like boobs keeps important issues immature enough for kids to wrap their heads around.
If she were to try to remember all of the technical terms for each part of her breast, she would be confused.. I mean.. no one else calls them mammary glands

At least they didnt say boulders , or boy toys...HA!

All I had for reading material about growing up were pamphlets telling me not to go swimming.

or play tennis.





and to stay away from horses.

Why not? Because I do not like the use of boobs and some other terminology. It cheapens women and girls in my opinion. I also prefer her to discuss sex with me first rather than get examples and explanations from magazines especially ones that use terms that are sexist rather than a positive self imagine.

I read the titles and not any of the content - some things were what is normal about nipples and stuff like that. Info about periods, what age they start and stuff around that; dating and stuff. I don't think anything was too offensive, just not age appropriate and not the message I want to send to my daughter.

I did not notice anything about condoms, but is she asked me, I would tell her at a level I feel she can deal with. She will ask me questions and I answer anything she asks - she has even stopped me because she says it too gross when she asked about how a baby is born. If she doesn't feel she is ready for that information yet, that is o-k too so let me know when to stop.

I did see some books based on the American Girls dolls that talk about similar things, but in a more positive way - not referring to body parts in sexual names, but their actual names and about how your body is changing. Even though I felt these were appropriate in their ways of handling this, I thought she may be a year or too away from this material.

Let's see. 3rd grade is about 8 years old, huh?
I think an article entitled "Boobs and Periods" is inappropriate for any young girl. The term boobs is too flip and casual to me and although i can appreciate the fact that we are living in different times than 1970, still, I think a young girl needs a healthier start than the casual tone that this title suggests.

Not to mention when I showed these titles to my husband, I thought he was going to have a heart attack.

The mear thought that is daughter will some day have a period or any other sort of development was enough to kill him.

I'll bet!

HA!
Your husband sounds like my husband.

Jillian is just now getting the concept of breasts.
She will poke mine and say " you have boobies or breasts "
Then she will touch her chest and say " I have no breasts" .. the other day she told me she just had " Bitty tiny boobies"

I agree... at 8 years old, simple flippant terms like boobs, peckers and other things you would say around a table of friends with a margarita in hand are inappropriate

what magazine was it by the way?

( GOD dont say teen cosmo! I hate that thing )

My daughters boobs started to show a little around 9 (I think). Then there was a hiatus for some length time that I dont recall.
8 is (maybe) not too young to have information available (depends on the kid and parents), But it needs to be presented as an opportunity for further discussion.

I'd rather it was presented as a where did I come from/whats happening to me type book. facts and factoids that will stimulate further dicussion.

Linkat--

You know full well that your daughter will pick her recreational reading according to her interests. If she's not interested in Boobs & Periods, she'll just flip past the article.

If she's interested enough to read it, she'll read it. Not only are we living in a culture permeated with sex, but little girls are becoming women as early as 5th grade. My d-i-l got her period in 5th grade.

Eventually, your daughter will not only read the article, she'll discuss the article and other information and misinformation with her friends. She might even be an Informed Authority--which is good for her ego and for the educational level of her peer group.

As for vocabulary words, which of these alternatives sounds more natural?

A. My mammary glands) are enlarging.

B. My boobs are getting bigger.

C. Unhand my mammary gland.

D. Take your paws off my boobs, you creep.

E. Her mammary glands were very visible.

F. Her boobs were flopping out of her costume.


Yes, the mystical vocabulary words are important, but if you believe the mantra that "Sex is a natural part of life" you have to accept that the informal vocabulary words are also necessary.

Knowing the name is having power over the named object. Don't deny your daughter names for her body parts because of religious awe or outmoded modesty.

The slang names shouldn't be the only names--but they shouldn't be dirty names, either.

I think your parents might have been slightly off base with age appropriate material, but your parents aren't batting a thousand these days, are they?

Also, you're a wee bit out of patience with them--remember this.

You have Interesting Times ahead. Hold your dominion.

*sigh*

As usual, Noddy comes through in perfect form.

(she is so wise)

Just trying to think what I would have done in your daughter's position...

First I would have argued to get the magazine back.
Then I would have tried to find it.
Finally I would have gone to the shop and bought a new copy.

Simply because: if it is worth taking it from me, it MUST be worth reading it!

My mother once took a book from me that I got out of her collection.
It was called: the good marriage or something like that.
I probably was around 12.
Of course I got it back and read it, when she wasn't there...

If she hadn't done that, I would have probably put it back after three or four pages, since it was totally boring (for me at the time).

You want to talk about early development.. my boobs were a B cup by the end of third grade.
I was teased to no end. But, looking back.. there were quite a few kids who really just wanted to touch them. Not in a sexual way.. just.. in a kids fascination with the one girl in class who has a chest like mama.. yet.. she is not mamas age..

When I was growing up I had access to a book called 'How your body works' and it shows the changes that happen in your body by making the body look like it is made up of all sorts of little factory production lines. It gets the basics across in a non graphic non flippant way, and supplies just enough info to keep a childs curiosity satisfied until they are a little older. It is a picture book perfect for her age, and the body change / sex parts are in with all the other parts of the body, so are displayed in a positive way as a normal natural process. Have a look, it's great

Bella--

Thanks for the kind words.

Bohne--

I agree.

My mother wouldn't have taken a magazine away--although she might have heaved a mighty sigh for the passing of childhood, she'd have been sighing out of my earshot.

I'm the mother/stepmother who collected every bit of free literature on Birth Control and plunked it down on the table in the kids' rec room where the lusty Middle School Warriors gathered to play Dungeons & Dragons.

Knowledge is power.

Re: Teen Magazines - Boobs and periods


Go see Juno.

Remember, a Girl in Transition can feel much more comfortable with boobs that get in the way than mammary glands that keep her from sleeping on her tummy any more.

It wasn't teen cosmo. Can't remember the name but it had teen the title.

Noddy - I agree she will read what is interesting to her.

However, I disagree with the terminology thing. There are plenty of acceptable, non-derogatory terms, that not scientific like mammary glands. Breast is nice sort and the proper term without it seems like she is a sex object. Personally, breasts sounds more natural to me than boobs. For what you listed I would replace breasts with boobs.

Sex is a natural part of life; however, young girls have enough issues from media and being a sexual object rather than a person. I wonder why so many girls have eating disorders or feel less confident - well you start referring to their body with names that are sexist rather than what they actually are - you get a different viewpoint of yourself.

Boobs and other words are used in a negative light that is the issue I have. If boobs had the same connation of breasts then I wouldn't care. I also don't like words like slutty, fat, etc. They exist and I certainly have no issue discussing these words with my daughter, but to have them read as normal in a magazine that is offering advice seems to be counterproductive to raise a self confident young women that her only basis for living is to be a sex object. I agree these words should only be slang words, but they do have a negative connotation.

I don't blame my parents on the magazine at all - they saw there was some pictures on the cover of some the teen stars my daughter liked and bought the magazine. If anything, my mom would be more conservative on this. She doesn't even like my kids using play makeup and complains of kids growing up too fast. They simply didn't see or notice the articles. We even told my daughter that - that it wasn't grammy and grampy fault buying the magazine, they just didn't notice that is was for teenagers and not for her age.