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The first "date"

 
 
Reply Wed 27 Feb, 2008 05:58 am
I know that many have different ideas and thoughts about - mostly 'forgetting' that we all were young once, that we have been in this situation as well .... and that (even if it's a platitude) times changed.

So one of our nephews has had his first date last weekend, 10 years old.

He got a letter, 'secretly', with "don't tell anybody about this!" on it (in the classroom, where else Laughing).
It was an invitation by one of his classmate for a film - he could choose one out of three and either Saturday or Sunday.

So SIL drove him to the cinema (okay, close to it, as a compromise), told him, he should phone her afterwards and she would bring both home.

He bought some popcorn and a coke for the girl - and returned home quite happy (by bus, the girl was caught up her mom).


My niece, six years older, had "inspected" him before (re clothes), most probably gave him some 'good advice' (I know her very well Laughing ) ...



When I was at that age, we didn't really think about such.

Might be, at 12, 13 we went to movies with girls.
But seperated.
And in a group.
And only after the girls already had decided to go there.

The only thing I remember was that circled (with a friend, not in a larger group) with our bicacles around the houses of those we admired ...


Is this similar elsewhere?
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Type: Discussion • Score: 1 • Views: 1,012 • Replies: 11
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Tigershark
 
  1  
Reply Wed 27 Feb, 2008 06:02 am
I have a mental image of you now as an adolescent Bart Simpson/stalker type? Laughing
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Linkat
 
  1  
Reply Wed 27 Feb, 2008 11:49 am
I wasn't allowed to date until I was 16. Anything else close prior to that age were almost as you describe. Went to school/church dances with girlfriends or parties or hanging out with groups of friends including boys. Separate dating didn't really happen until much later.

My husband has declared that our daughters are not allowed to date until well into their adulthood.
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Walter Hinteler
 
  1  
Reply Wed 27 Feb, 2008 12:05 pm
My rather very conservative parents allowed first dazes from dancing school onwards - that was at the age of 15 (for boys, 14 for girls) in the 60's.

When I worked in and with youth clubs, youth centers and schools in the late 80's and through the 90's, the age here in our rural and conservative-coined part of the country had gone down to about 12.

Colleagues from the big cities (and other more liberal parts of the state) noticed an earlier age even in those days.
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Eva
 
  1  
Reply Wed 27 Feb, 2008 06:20 pm
I was allowed to go on "dates" with groups or double-dates when I was 15, but no single dating until I was 16. Of course, that was centuries ago. <snicker>

My son went on his first date last summer. He was 13, she was 14. They went to the fair with several other kids their age. Parents dropped off & picked up. SonofEva was unimpressed. Very Happy
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hamburger
 
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Reply Wed 27 Feb, 2008 06:30 pm
listening to some of our friends that grew up in rural canada , i was quite surprised to hear that they started "serious" dating at a fairly early age - about 14 - 15 years old for the boys .
since we went to schools where boys and girls attented separate schools , we (that is , my friends and i) didn't really meet any girls until we were about 16 - 17 - and almost always going out in groups - certainlly no serious dating at that stage .
how times have changed - must be getting old Laughing
hbg
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Green Witch
 
  1  
Reply Wed 27 Feb, 2008 06:42 pm
Walter, I love the fact that the girl took the initial step and asked your nephew out. I remember having a so called "boyfriend" about that age, but it didn't mean much, maybe we held hands walking to school. I would never have had the nerve at that age to do what that little girl did. Good for her (and your nephew).
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Walter Hinteler
 
  1  
Reply Wed 27 Feb, 2008 11:23 pm
My niece, his sister, did the very same as that girl when she was about .... 12, I think.

Last year (15 then(, she decided together with her girl friend, to have a sabbatical: they wanted to improve at school. And since they really did, they stayed on it ... until :wink:
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ossobuco
 
  1  
Reply Thu 28 Feb, 2008 01:00 am
Here's an old post of mine (cringe) -
http://www.able2know.org/forums/viewtopic.php?p=580162#580162

Posted: Sat 28 Feb, 2004 7:34 pm Post: 580162 -

laughing with acquiunk..


well, now, best, don't get me started.....

worst, there were a few of those, the primo one, being formative, was when I was 13. We were younger then than now, in some ways if not all.

I had been asked out for my first actual date by a fellow I had no idea at all of his liking me. He asked me to the movies, to see, ahem, Taza, Son of Chochise at the local theater. I think I reacted in some stunned way, and said yes and probably thank you.

I worried so beforehand. I hardly knew him. (His cousin had sent me a valentine in fourth grade, now there was a hunk. But I was pleased and horrified that this fellow liked me.)

So, he came to the door and somehow we got down the steps and walked the two plus sort of long blocks to the bus on Ridge Avenue. On that walk I asked him all my prepared questions, fairly slowly, the answers were short. The specific one I remember was if he was going to go out for basketball. (no). I finally gave up, I was not at all a natural at conversation. We got the bus. We saw the movie (Jeff Chandler, Rock Hudson..) and took the bus back and walked to my door, where I said something and he said something,
end of story.

Agggggggh. He was 5' 4", which doesn't, we know, necessarily preclude a lot of people having fun at basketball - my favorite basketball being the under six foot tournies at Venice Beach; so, he could have been a point guard, but nooooooooooooooo. My father was 5' 6", it never occurred to me such a question could hurt. And the date had gone to hell before that anyway. But that must have been the capper.

Adding, I was sometime later in real love with a fellow who was 5'3 - major mind. Mountain climber, compact body. I was in that early example just a complete idiot on that first, very first, date at 13. As it happened, I was still the walking innocent when I met my mountain climber, but not near as dumb, me, I mean, when I was 21.
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Bohne
 
  1  
Reply Thu 28 Feb, 2008 03:51 am
At 10 years old, I was still beating up the boys (and for several years, thereafter, I think!)

And I only went to the cinema once as a child with my mother's cousin.

Yes, I think those were different times!
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Walter Hinteler
 
  1  
Reply Thu 28 Feb, 2008 07:23 am
Bohne wrote:

Yes, I think those were different times!


Certainly. On the other hand - I've been 14 when I travelled the first to England, alone, though to a language school. And 15, when going there completely on my own, in 1964 ...
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sozobe
 
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Reply Thu 28 Feb, 2008 07:59 am
Huh.

I pretty much never went on a date, ever. I went out with friends. Some were girls, some were boys. OK I guess there were some concert "dates," when I was 16 and up.

When I was 10 I had crushes but definitely no dates with those crushes.

I don't know how I'll handle this with sozlet, ugh (must I?)
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