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Sun 13 Jan, 2008 04:58 pm
Okay when i was 15 i met this guy on the net he was 17.... its was a first true love kinda thing we talked for about 2 years and only met for two weeks, ( he lived in another contry!) but it was definatley love love love. But since i was young and this was my first relationship i couldnt handle the long distance and i wanted to experiance live you know... so i left him. Ive regreted it ever since.... because i always said we should still be friends but i think he got to the point were that was it. We both kinda moved on and never kept in contact apart from the old email in one year ! 3 years later, after me sendin him a million emails to contact me and stop igonoring me, he tells me hes moved to japan and married maybe even with a kid on the way !.
Ive been in a relationship for the past 3 years but it has never compared to what me and this other boy had....this news has hit me like a tonne of bricks. I think at the back of my mind i thought we would eventually get back together or was i kinding myself? why after three years cant i forget him ? do you think this marriage is real, i mean i dont want to wish anything bad on him but he was the kinda guy to fall in love quick and deep .... but i still cant believe it. Ive got so many emotions going through me jealousy guilt ( cause of my boyfriend) sadness, loss . What should i do ?
Ah - that first love . . .you never forget it.
But, dear, you are in love with a fantasy.
Time to move on.
There was something you really liked about him.
Try to figure out what that was, and find it in another man.
Good luck.
Kash--
In another currently-active thread on A2K, an old love of one of our members just joined and discovered that her Beloved died nearly three years ago. While she knew he'd moved on with his life and had married, she has trouble comprehending that they will never meet again.
You're in the same position. Your old swain has been ignoring you for some time, but because e-mail isn't nearly as personal as face to face rejection, you forgot to notice the romance was over.
Now he's definitely not available any more. He's moved on with his life. You've suddenly been forced to take a good look at what you've accomplished since you split and all of a sudden "experiencing life" seems a little empty of positive achievements.
What about your current relationship? Is that solid or were you starting to feel a bit confined and frustrated?
This relationship is over!
That is the one thing you have to admit to yourself.
Stop dreaming about what may have been!
You don't know, and you will never find out.
You have been together with this guy for two weeks, that is not enough, to decide that he would have been the one for life!
Maybe some of his habbits would have driven you over the edge, had you had the chance to experience them!
Maybe the other way round!
Close this chapter of your life.
It's over!
Concentrate on your present and the person you are with.
He deserves to be more than a stand-in while you continue to dream.
Give him 100%, that's what he deserves, and if you cannot manage it, maybe he is not the right guy for you, then be honest with yourself and him and end the relationship.
This way he can look for a fulfilling relationship elsewhere and so can you!
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