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Fri 5 Oct, 2007 01:34 pm
My very rich, very eccentric friend, Leonard Leo, has been, um, er, dead for several years now. Wait! He's not really dead, he's been cryonically suspended since Christmas Day 1999. Literally. He's suspended in a tank of clear liquid gel, you can see him hanging there like a well filled out suit of clothes. There's a few tubes inserted here and there to monitor the ins and outs of the small amounts of nutrients he gets by absorbing them through his skin from the liquid, but other than that Leonard looks like he always looked, a little sleepy and a little gray.
Here's the thing, his wife Estella, also a friend of mine, wants him declared dead for real. She and Tommy, you might know him, he made a dollar or two by inventing bubblewrap, want to stop sneaking around behind Lenny's tank and get married. Beats the hell out of me why. They have everything. She spends as much money as she wants. He couldn't be richer, but one or both of them had some kind of spiritual awakening and now believe that doing the horizontal boggle-loo without the banns of marriage is going to send them straight to hell.
Plus, they want to pull the plug on Lenny.
What the hell has all this got to do with you?
Well, the attorneys, who else?, have decided and got some judge on the Upper East Side of New York City to agree, that unless his doctors can prove that Leonard is still alive, he'll have to be declared dead.
(Something about the seven years that have passed since his appearance in the marital bed, blah blah blah.)
So they are going to wake him up, dry him off and cart him over to the Supreme Court (Don't get excited. Here in New York, that's just the name of the Appeals Court) And make him show that he is still amongst the quickened.
And here's where you come in. (Finally!!)
Leonard needs an update of the news. It can't be too long or too short, something that he can read in the cab going over and recite to the judge when he is questioned on current events.
So,...... if you had to tell Leonard what is going on in the world right now, what would you say are the most important items of interest?
The first thing that came to my mind was Brittany Spears which is why I am not allowed to offer my opinion any further.
Please save Leonard's life. He will donate a large amount of money to prevention of Kitten Deaths. (A LOT of them have been dying around here lately.)
Thank you in advance.
Joe(1999 seems a very long time ago)Nation
What? No one in this highly informed bunch can come up with a succinct summary of the present day?
Joe(maybe the world is too complicated)Nation
Could he just tell the judge it feels warmer?
I think our biggest problem is getting him to believe that George Bush was elected president twice (he knew him at Yale) and that the Dow is over 14,000. And that the Red Sox won the World Series.
Joe(Oh, sh-t. I forgot. We have to mention the Wars.)Nation
Uh, Joe, the news is that the NY Supreme Court is not the appeals court; it's the court of first resort (called the Superior Court in most states). The appeals court is called -- ta da! -- The Court of Appeals.
PS The news is that for most of the past 7 years, it's been the 21st century.
No wonder no one answered the door on Friday.
I must have mis-understood this from the NYT:
But that' snot the point.
Full Disclosure:
I think I have become disillusioned.
I have a bet with myself that the world has become so complicated that it's impossible to describe the events in any brief form, yet the media attempts to do just that on an everyday basis. And fails. There is too much information, too much news to decide from.
Which is the more important story?
1 in 22 people in the District of Columbia is HIV Positive
Super Strain of E.coli emerges
The Battle Against the Gray Squirrel in Britain
LINK Fascinating.
The story that will most likely run on TV is the one which has some kind of video associated with it.
Joe(right after the latest on Brittany has been expounded upon)Nation
Joe Nation wrote:....
I must have mis-understood this from the NYT:
Quote:The United States Supreme Court hears arguments tomorrow in a challenge to New York's undemocratic method of electing its Supreme Court judges. A federal appeals court ruled that the process, a relic of the era of clubhouse politics, infringes on the constitutional rights of voters and candidates. The Supreme Court should affirm that well-reasoned decision.
New York's Supreme Court judges are trial-level judges, not members of the state's highest court, which is the Court of Appeals
...
Emphasis mine, plus I added the green stuff, which the NY Times writer shoulda added in order to clarify things.
PS Does Lenny know Ted Williams?
Sure, littleK, complicate things even more by bringing in ANOTHER whole planet. Tis a great story though, those wonderful robots doing what they were supposed to do and then ...... they keep going and going and going.
Lenny is staying with me for a few days while we straighten out where the hearing is supposed to be. Is that remark about Ted Williams a reference to his family's attempt to freeze him? Leonard wasn't frozen, I thought I made that clear, he was just submerged in a nutrient rich gel, rather like ammonic fluid, but with even less chance of viral or bacterial infectious agents.
He is resting now.
Joe(Maybe later he could ask you some questions)Nation
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