Do new relationships get boring after awhile??

EileenM ~ welcome to the group! I can tell you from experience that this site is GREAT for support and advice.

My opinion on your question is probably not what you want to hear, but it's just an opinion.

Some people just don't want to be alone.

That was me being devil's advocate.

Have you asked your boyfriend how he feels about your relationship? After all, these thoughts are YOURS and not necessarily on the mark.

Each relationship is different.....and as you get older, getting to know someone new brings all the same feelings/excitement/wonder, but it's a calmer situation because of a few things.....You don't want to screw things up. You're finally ready to enjoy your partner instead of being caught up (only) in the feelings stemming from the newness of your relationship.

I don't think you would have asked all of us faceless people what we thought if you weren't truly concerned.....Talk to your boyfriend. Please.

And let us know! Best of luck to you!

Your best advice comes from within, so this is like astrology or poetry -- if some of our words seem pertinent or true, then maybe you have something there. Only EileenM knows!

Talk talk, listen listen, talk talk, listen. To really understand your boyfriend the best source of information is your boyfriend.

Any words you tell us here will be colored by your own interpretation and agenda, and not objectively describe your boyfriend. So why not go to the source?

Always growing? If you don't increasingly share things back and forth, talking, then you won't have much of a relationship anyways.

If it's any consolation, every day is new and every personal relationship is as unique as the people in it. Only he can tell you how unique, different, and valued you are in his life. And vice versa. Is he special to you? You to him?

Always changing? If you and he are self-made people, not trapped by patterns of behavior, then just the way you look at each other will express completely different things as life keeps on changing.

Relationships do get stale. But it's not to do with previous relationships, as much as what people look forward to. Does he want the same things that you want? Do you two of you share similar dreams? Do both of you think in the same way? Is there a curiosity and excitement about the future? Do the possibilities open or close when the two of you are together? Does being with him make you smile? Does it make him smile?

Random thoughts ... Even what is lacking can often be created, with awareness and deliberate tact. But it takes two to tango, and two to work at it.

Sadness, pain or frustration is not a problem per se. Discouragement is just another part of life. They are not bad signs unless they dominate ones outlook and decisions. His jaded memories are as naturally part of life as breathing, so as long as both of you breath through it and move on to the next thing, then frustrations become like a stretch or a yawn, getting one ready for what's really important.

"Going through the motions ... new joys"? Does his personality, lifestyle and character continue to grow? Does yours? Do both of you pursue your own life, on your own terms, always learning and discovering? "New things" are a conscious lifestyle choice, and both people must share the practice for it to be viable. It's not on/off, have it or don't, but shows up in degrees and different directions.

Sometimes opposites attract, but a shared way of being keeps people connected and strongly together.

Rae and CodeBerg give some great insight. I can just give a quick personal observation. I've had countless boyfriends over the last 16 years - a few months here, a year there, one was 3 years....

When I start feeling 'bored' it's because of the person, not because I'm in a relationship. The spark isn't always there 24/7, but if I get the constant feeling that I'd have more fun someplace else, well, I go someplace else.

Every relationship is different and grows (or doesn't) in different ways. Not to downplay relationships but it's a bit like - everyone has a job, some go through many, some leave when their bored, and some find the perfect fit after all that, something they love day after day (but maybe not everyday).

Two relationships doesn't equate to 'been there, done that' - life is full of new experiences.

Good advice, all around. A relationship is work. Some people do not like going to work, and then come home and 'work'. The key is learning how to communicate without being negative, on both sides. If you have that, you have the foundation for a future. If he is right for you, he will accept the 'living in a relationship' thing as a new and exciting challenge.

thanks everyone for the advice and words of wisdom. Yup, I'm going to discuss everything this weekend with my 'boy'. Wish me luck.

Good luck, Eileen!

All relationships go through the "honeymoon" phase, where everything is new and exciting. After awhile, when two people become comfortable with one another, that level of excitement no longer exists. If the relationship is sound, the excitement will be replaced by a deeper level of caring, that is quieter, but much more enduring.

If the relationship was based only on the excitement, it has to deteriorate.

Yep. Who was it on A2K that used the phrase "approximate 2-year chemical madness"?

Just because he's been to Disney World doesn't mean he won't enjoy 6 Flags over Georgia!