Working Women: Wedded to Work, in Dire Need of a Wife

Maybe this is why some professional women marry men, who stay at home all day, being "stay at home" moms, while their wives climbs the corporate ladder.

In years past this position would have been called house keeper.
Professional women in this position should consider opening their homes to a suitable single mum.

Free rent food utilities in return for domestic duties. Maybe a small stipend as well.

I say give women wives.... if they want the same perks as men, they should also suffer equally....

I'm with Bear on this one.

The logic is: "I want a full-time, elbow-pushing job, I want a full-time, elbow pushing husband, I want double income and double work satisfaction but I want no stranger to help us bring up the kids". I want to have the cake and I want to eat it too and I complain because I can't.

Now, if the husband does the house chores, he doesn't do them "right enough" for the woman. Be it bed making, doing the laundry or washing dishes, they know the Correct Method and he is "clumsy", "disorderly" or even "heterodox".

So the solution for this persons is to dump the husband and find another spouse with little or no outside work aspirations (most likely they'll find a woman). Forget about the double income and get ready to climb the corporate ladder free of burden (hey, but the spouse will want vacations, new sheets, perhaps a SUV, visits to her mother's...)

Ah stop yer whining and head over to the mens thread about sports and farting.





I would say that Bear has been good about sharing laundry, house cleaning, bed making, grocery shopping duties and all of that, but he'd kill me if I let that cat outta the bag.

Just find a young live-in boyfriend who wants to be a boy-toy...

No, the "logic" is that if a woman wants to successfully compete at the top of the corporate world, she is handicapped, by her own inclinations and what she sees as societal judgement on her personal lifestyle, against the advantages of her male colleagues who have a stay-at-home spouse. The challenge is to find an acceptable way around this problem -- and that's what all the grousing is about.

I don't know what the solution is. As an interior designer dealing with corporate and commercial spaces, I've observed many upper echelon management and executive professionals. And I've watched many capable, intelligent women burn out trying to deal with this lifestyle conflict.

Oprah is a miracle worker. She's also single and probably will never marry...

It doesn't have to be a "wife". When my retired mother was visiting for two months that was sheer bliss. I didn't have to enter the kitchen the entire time - there was breakfast at the table, dinner, the shopping was done, and we had a a built-in babysitter too.

I wish she'd move in with us, but she doesn't want to leave Europe.

Bookmarking.
I love my 62 year old nanny who does practically everything my husband and I would collectively do around the house but I have certain issues with her( Emotional of course) Sometimes I feels I should get paid for letting her enjoy my Beautiful home and wonderful children allday. I hate it when my 3yo run to her after giving me 3-4 min of her time.

By the way did anyone hear male fishes in Potomac river laying eggs. Being activelly researched currently !!!

Well LMK,

not having to worry about your children while you're working is priceless.
There are so many dysfunctional nannies out there where you always
have to wonder if they mistreat your children, and it's quite reassuring to know, they're in safe hands.

True CJ, It is just that I do not think it is natural to have bith parents stay out for so long and children gets taken care of by a Nanny. I fhad started to question the lifestyle. It felt like we both kill ourselves all day and then find ways to redirect money for expenses that would not have been there if we were not away that much.

I am glad I had the option to cut down. I understand many women don't and then you just make the best of the situation. I firmly believe that not only is it important for kids to have a mom who is available in it's true sense but also it fulfils a great deal of Mom's own requirements.

As far as needing a wife I think Even Stay at home Moms should have a wife. For some reason I cannot imagine not having help and tackling morning madness, cleaning, tennis, music homework dinners, cleaning and taking care of your personal needs. I think may be it is what we have that determines what we are going to do with it. MAy be if I did not have a live in dependable Nanny I would cut down on the avtivities or perhaps My husband would have to actually do things like CHANGE A DIAPER.

So in a way I have a wife and I am loving it. My husband is loving it and does not want to let her go. IT is very expensive but for what it gives us is pricelesss. HE thinks even though I work parttime as long as we can afford to pay her we should keep her. I am enjoying it while I can.

I just think it comes down to personal choice. We can't do everything...can't have everything. In making choices we just choose what is most important to us. I would love to have the money that working full time would give me now that two of my kids are in school. The problem is - they would have to be with someone else every afternoon and all summer...that makes me sad. I can't say that the money is worth missing that time with them. I love them and my time with them is already taken up with 8 hours of school everyday...I just have my 4 yo still and next year he will be in kindergarten so even he will be gone. Then I will consider part time work I fuess...but even that I would have to quit come summer time.

If I worked full-time we may have a little more - not much - as a liberal arts major - Music Major/English Minor - no teaching degree WHAT WAS I THINKING? We would have more money for a bigger college fund or for better vacations for the boys...but I would miss time from them. I question if I am being selfish by not working. It would certainly help my husband out. But even he says he wants the boys to be able to play and wander aimlessly in the summer and not have to be scheduled, which they would have to be if they were in a summer day camp somewhere. Anyway...it is a constant struggle for women who want to fulfill their desire to be something apart from wife and mom. I guess in that I am lucky...it is why I got the liberal arts degree. I just want to be a wife and mom. I like it a lot! If I could find a way to bring in money out of the home - I would be all over it!

So true Mismi, I loved your postin letting boys be boys, that would be like a dream come true for me to have what you have. Because my career I can only afford two who are 4.5 years part and both feel lonely. I think they are bridging the gap as they groe though.

Bigger college funds are needed by parents who don't do theit job right in the first place. Kids don't care which country club they grow up in and which resort they go to. My son hates it that my country club neighbours wont wend kids out to play on a culdesac street. I hate it. His idea of vacation is be with his 11yr old cousin in SF and no more. Your heart is in the right place you are doing what Nature intended for us to do. You are nurturing the greatest source of LOVE ...... CHILD. ( Maria Montessori in Absorbent mind, just started it is difficylt reading)

How I have tackled the issue is by working weekends only. Trade off where hubby will have the kids ( With the nanny of course yeah that is how spoiled he is) Most things that IO want to do with the kids like NO SCREEN, sports and reading and homework will happen on the weekdays then they could relax on the weekends while I work. I get my personal time on weekdays when they are in school. And we try to have a nice family time most evenings. So far so good.

Bento Boxes have arrived. So far the only thing thgat is coming back is steamed vegetables, which is Ok. It even has a little box for ketchup. I do not know how well insulation works though because I would not put anything steaming hot and close the lid because it will get soggy.
We did CHiken tenders, veg and fruit. Turkey sandwiches with fruit and yogurt amoothie, firday is pizza day and I let him take it from the cafeteria. My daughter does not want to go to the cafeteria and she took cheese cubes , dates, grapes and chery tomatoes with a yogurt smoothie.

I think we should share everyone's favourite recipes that works for kids or that can be made with the kids. I have noticed that they love to eat what you make with them. I do not know if that has been discussed somewhere else. Will try searching. Just NEW at all this but loving it !!!