Reply
Fri 13 Jul, 2007 07:25 pm
I have always heard that kids like to see their parents be affectionate. I'm not talking about sexual -- but affection, hand holding, little kisses, snuggle on the couch, talk and laugh together kind of affection.
Rumor has it that this gives kids a sense of security because they know their parents like each other.
Not around here. Not anymore, anyway.
Mo has become extremely possessive of me. Maybe because it's summer and we're spending so much time just hanging out together or something to do with his age or something else entirely but, frankly, it's become a little annoying.
Mr. B and I are not all slurpy on each other or anything but we are affectionate. It makes Mo furious. Mr. B and I can hardly have a conversation together. Forget about dancing. Forget about snuggling on the couch. Forget about laughing together. Forget it.
It's like having some uptight, wet blanket, chaperone around 24/7.
Any ideas on what the heck this is all about?
He's jealous of you.
ever hear of Eddy Puss?
This too shall pass.
My niece is also very jealous of her mother and father sharing a hug - it's more than just the eddy puss (ha!) syndrome.
I like Freud's writing on religion more than his writing on sex but....
I could maybe see that IF his relationship with Mr. B wasn't as wonderful as it was. He adores Mr. B more than he does me. But this weirdness seems directed at me.
What do you think is going on with your niece, littlek? How old is she?
She's nearly 8. This isn't an issue much anymore, but was up to about a year ago. I dunno what's up with her. She has always had a super-glue tight relationship with her mother. My sis wouldn't put her down, wouldn't let anyone else hold her unless she really couldn't, nursed her for a VERY long time, sat on sis' lap at dinner. S would refuse her dad and I regularly and pitch fits when sis left for work, almost daily for 3 years. Eventually she let her dad and I in, and then eventually the rest of the family. And now she seems to have become more amiable to others since her brothers' been around. She was so close to her mom that she refused to believe she could love anyone else. I'd tell her I loved her once in a while and she'd sort of shrivel and cringe and would only allow herself to love her mom (wouldn't love her dad either).
Ohhhhh. Interesting, littlek. Thank you for sharing that.
really? Is it helpful to you?
Yes it did.
Obviously our situation is a little different but in some ways it is really similar.
When Mo was really little and he still lived with his others but spent a lot of time here he was really "my little friend". Mr. B liked him and everything but it was really about Mo and me.
His relationship with Mr. B is close but.... different....
When Mr. B gets home Mo doesn't really want to have much to do with me. Unless Mr. B wants to have much to do with me and then it becomes this very intense and very focused possessiveness towards me.
It's just really strange. It makes me tired.
hmmm.... it'll work out, I imagine. Maybe you should have another child (heeheehee).
Maybe he just wants on attention on him. Usually when my husband and I get kissy - our girls just say yeck, gross. But sometimes when we cuddle or hug, they try to push their way in. I think they simply want to be the center of attention.
Yeah, seems to be mostly an attention thing with us, too. When E.G. and I hug, sozlet usually wants to be part of the hug (we often pick her up and do a three-way hug thing).
I remember reading that 6 is an age when embarrassment really kicks in. I looked for that and noticed it with sozlet. The bathroom door must be closed now, the blinds must be closed if she's only wearing underwear, etc. (That's all new.) That seemed to coincide with the "ew" and yuckiness when E.G. and I kiss in front of her. She used to smile and seem to think it was nice. It may have to do with her recent education on how babies are made, too, though as far as we can tell she thinks we did it once, to create her, not that it's an ongoing thing.
Mo has so many jury-rigged mental connections that I wouldn't think of trying to sort them out.
I will say that his possessive behavior is probably more normal than abnormal. All little boys want to be King of the Universe and the Most Important Person in the Room.
I'll also offer my sympathy--and the bromide, "This too shall pass.
Stumble It!
Tweet This
Bookmark on Delicious
Share on Facebook
Share on MySpace