Two friends of mine got married . . . in 1977? . . . maybe. The date is not important. My friend whom i had by then known for several years was then working as the handyman at a Presbyterian church, and was marrying a woman he had met a few years after i had met him (i was in the army with his sister), and the preacher had enthusiastically urged them to marry in his church. So my friend asked me to be the best man, to which i agreed. The preacher's last name was almost the same as mine, but spelled slightly differently. The Irish will understand: his is the Protestant version, and mine is the Catholic. When my friend introduced me to him, he asked me what religion i practiced, so i told him honestly that i practiced no religion. He was careful not to spoil the happiness of my friends, but he let me know that he despised me. He would give the most evil glares when he knew my friends would not see it. I never knew if that was because i had once been a Catholic, or because i was now irreligious. But it didn't really matter to me, so long as he had sufficient decency not to spoil the happiness of my friends, and he went at least that far.
But i've thought about it often since that time. There was nothing remotely Christian about his attitude, and him a putative minister of the gospel of Jesus, who is supposedly the Prince of Peace. At this point in my life, i realize that there are damned few genuinely charitable people in the world. Almost anyone can work up ordinary decency, but so few can resist the temptation to despise others for what they believe . . . or what they won't believe. I think precious few Christians take to heart the injunctions of their boy Jesus . . .
But I say unto you which hear, Love your enemies, do good to them which hate you,
Bless them that curse you, and pray for them which despitefully use you.
And unto him that smiteth thee on the one cheek offer also the other; and him that taketh away thy cloak forbid not to take thy coat also.
Give to every man that asketh of thee; and of him that taketh away thy goods ask them not again.
(Luke, Chapter Six, verses 27 throgh 30, in the King James Version)
I am not the enemy of Christians, i do not hate them, i do not curse them (provided they leave me alone), i do not use them despitefully, nor smite them, nor take from them what is theirs. Yet i could count on the fingers of my hands the number of self-professed Christians who, knowing my irreligion, have treated me as they are enjoined to do in those verses--when it would cost them nothing.
I am, in fact, amazed that you've prospered in your relationship as you have. My characterization of it would be that love and mutual respect can overcome the suspicion and contempt which seem to flow all to easily from religious people, in despite of the injunctions of their creed.