New Betty Bowers special miracle greeting cards

NEW BETTY BOWERS SPECIAL MIRACLE GREETING CARDS

Dear Patriot and Prayer Warrior:

Do you ever feel tempted to provide a reproach or revelation to the spiritually or, worse, politically unsaved? But, of course, you hold back, don't you? And run off to your smart luncheon or philanthropic awards banquet, as the dreadful person you toyed with speaking at slides further down the iniquitous slope to a certain, deserved Hell.

Well, don't be too hard on yourself, dear. No one wishes to be caught by paparazzi speaking to the spiritually sullied -- or poorly groomed.

But I have some wonderful news for you! You may now reach out to even the most odious people -- without any risk of them getting close enough to size up your lovely jewelry or become so mesmerized by your flawless skin tone that they plummet into the all-consuming vortex of imagined sexual shenanigans.

As of this blessed day, I am making Miracle Cards available to all of my acolytes. Miracle Cards are felicitous electronic greeting cards that you may personalize and send to people you know -- or to people you wish you didn't.

Is there some horrible creature in your address book that needs to know what you think of their liberal politics? Witness to them with a George W. Bush Miracle Card! Is there someone in your reluctant acquaintance who is so poisoned by their corrosive envy that they feigned finding fault with your look? Save them with a Betty Bowers Miracle Card!

Just go to this page and follow the instructions:
http://www.bettybowers.com/card.html

So close to Jesus, when He loses a soul, it's covered by my homeowner's policy,

Mrs. Betty Bowers
America's Best Christian and Most Saved Baptist