Older sibling present?

(A stuffed ANIMAL...)

What I would do, is walk up the little fella', and say "hey there! Looks like you've got something behind your ear!" Then pretend to pull a nickel out from his/her ear, followed by a hearty tussle of their hair. Kids dig it.

I think it is a nice idee to give something to the older sibling.
In some prts of Germany there was a custom that the baby brought a bag of sweets with him/her as a present for the other siblings. It was called Storchentüte ( stork's bag-- at that time the stork was the one who brought the babies:wink:).
I still do it- some sweets and a toy which will be right for the older one.
For family members there is a toy and something to keep. My daughter still wears a necklace she got when her brother was borne.

I think it a great idea!


Perhaps a toy for the new older brother/sister who has just emerged...ie they have a special new role because of the baby, so it is like a new birthday for them?

I usually make up a basket with something for everyone in the house.

When we recently went to Buttercup's - first visit since the baby was born - I had something for BabyCup, Buttercup, and something for Buttercup and Beau to share (fleece blanket and candles).

I've occasionally gone to the BodyShop and done whole family baskets - grooming stuff for dad, funny shampoos for the other kids, MamaPopo stuff for mom and baby.

When the neighbours had twins a year and a half ago, I got gifts for all of the kids (sister and cousins) that live in the same house. Matching outfits for all of the girls, an outfit for the baby boy - with a matching baseball cap for his teen brother holding a gift certificate that he applied to an IPOD he'd been saving for. That family's just too big to give gifts to EVERYONE who lives there - so I stuck to everyone under the age of 15.

I usually make up a basket with something for everyone in the house.

When we recently went to Buttercup's - first visit since the baby was born - I had something for BabyCup, Buttercup, and something for Buttercup and Beau to share (fleece blanket and candles).

I've occasionally gone to the BodyShop and done whole family baskets - grooming stuff for dad, funny shampoos for the other kids, MamaPopo stuff for mom and baby.

When the neighbours had twins a year and a half ago, I got gifts for all of the kids (sister and cousins) that live in the same house. Matching outfits for all of the girls, an outfit for the baby boy - with a matching baseball cap for his teen brother holding a gift certificate that he applied to an IPOD he'd been saving for. That family's just too big to give gifts to EVERYONE who lives there - so I stuck to everyone under the age of 15.

I always geet something for the sibling(s). Doesn't have to be much.

Thanks, guys!

As an only child who has an only child I'm pretty much entirely a stranger to the whole sibling dynamics thing. I knew it would make the older brother happier to have his own present, but I wasn't sure if it was a signal I should avoid sending. Hard to articulate the signal I have in mind -- something about how one sibling deserves something every time the other gets something.

From the feedback so far it sounds like I shouldn't worry about that.

I love the whole-family basket idea, ehBeth! Maybe I'll enlarge it to that. The clothes are essentially for the mom (the baby doesn't care, and I got colors/ patterns that I know the mom will like), but maybe something extra specifically for the parents plus something for big bro.

A think that a lot of sibling rivalry happens at the birth of the second child. The first born, who has formerly been the "star" is relegated to the role of bit player. All the fuss focuses on the new baby.

One of the ways to avoid this is to create an important niche for the older child. He/she needs to be fussed over at this time, more than usual. I think that one of the things that parents can do is to make a big to do about the fact that the first child now has the exalted position of big brother/sister. After all, the infant does not understand what is going on, and by directing some of the fanfare to the elder child, he/she is made to feel that he now has an important part in the family.

That is why I think that when gifts are given to the infant, a small gift for the "big brother" is definitely in order. It does not have to be expensive, but simply a token that the older child is acknowledged, and not pushed behind the scenes, while his little sibling is getting all the attention.

Another thing. When I visited a family who just had a second child, I would make it my business to fuss over the older one.

... but she'll have trouble squeezing into them.

For one of my friends (who chose to wear the special socks I wore her for labour), I went with a whole family sock and footwear theme. Baby shoes/sneakers and socks - and funky socks for everyone else in the family.

I'm not sure who had the most fun with that one - me or the dad who was THRILLED that anyone even noticed he was still in the house.