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Mon 22 Jan, 2007 06:20 am
OK, I decided to finally ask the question, but the story first:
Maybe you remember, that I have a 6 month old son.
He is perfect, a very happy and easy baby.
We also recently moved, so our house is still full of boxes, that need to be sorted out.
Now for a while I have been feeling constantly tired and unmotivated.
Whenever my alarm clock rings at 07:15h, I feel like doing something very violent with it.
Despite this, I get up, get dressed, feed the cats, get the baby up and dressed, maybe feed him, if he's hungry and leave at 08:15h
I drop him off at his day mother's and get to work for 09:00h.
I work till 15:00h, having lunch in front of the monitor (usually leftovers reheated in the microwave).
At least twice a week I try to leave work dead on time, so I can get about 40 minutes of running in before picking my sweety up at 16:00h
Once a week I have to rush to get to the post office which closes at 16:00h, so I pick him up earlier.
Occasionally I do some shopping on my way home, otherwise I go there directly.
Then I try to spend some time with my son.
Play, sing, feed him.
Twice a week I have to be at the pool at 19:00h since I am a dive instructor (in my spare time) and we just started a new course.
OK, additional information: My husband has been abroad for three weeks and won't be back until the end of the month.
Usually he stays with the baby, when I go to the pool, but at the moment, I always try to find someone to take him to the baby pool while I am in the water (we are a big club, so that usually works).
Once a week I go for a fast walk/slow run with a girl around 18:00h
She has just started running and needs some motivation.
My son comes with us in the stroller (since my husband is away).
Between 20:00h and 21:30h I put the baby to bed.
Now I get very hectic, try to do laundry, sort out rubbish (which I take out with me on the days I go to the post office), get my stuff ready for the next day, do some sewing, sort out photographs (there were a lot that needed sorting and sending from our trip to the States in December), write birthday cards (two to three a week, usually), check my email, maybe cook some food for the next day, do some cleaning and tidying up(if I am lucky),...
Around 23:00h baby wakes up and wants to eat.
This is a new habit, he used to sleep all the way through the night, not sure what happened, but it does not bother me too much, since I am still up anyway.
However, all of a sudden it is around midnight and I think ****, WHERE DID THE TIME GO, HAVE TO GO TO BED.
By the time I get that far (after some last quick tasks that REALLY need to be done right now, and having a shower or quick bath), it's usually 01:00h or thereabouts.
It takes me about 30-60 minutes to go to sleep.
Between 06:00h and 07:00h baby wakes up and wants breakfast.
And then at 07:15h the whole thing starts over.
Now my question: What am I doing wrong, or am I just not getting it?
There are woman out there who have three or four children and manage.
Some have fussy crying babies and they manage.
Some have full-time jobs (I only work 6 hours a day) and they manage.
Why do I feel as if everything is getting out of control?
p.s. when my husband is back, I won't have to do post office or rubbish any more, and he also does a lot of laundry
Just reading your post is causing me to become exhausted. Bottom line, you have much too much on your plate. IMO, you need to prioritize, and cut out some of the stuff that is not so important. (You will probably be able to add some stuff back in, when your husband returns, and assumes some of the responsibilities that you are faced with now.)
First of all, you are overtired. It is taking you 30-60 minutes to go to sleep, because you are still wound up when you go to bed. Not having enough sleep is enough to make a person cranky, short tempered, and if it continues, even disoriented. You need to slow down.
Good God! I'd drop dead of a heart attack if I had a schedule half so full! I suggest throttling back a little bit, but then I'm a person that enjoys his relaxing moments rather than going-going-going all the time. If I had one further suggestion, I'd say spend more time with the kidlet and less on some of the activities.
Slow down, you move too fast
You got to make the morning last
Just kicking down the cobblestones
Looking for fun and feeling groovy
Ba da da da da da da, feeling groovy
Hello lamppost, what'cha knowing
I've come to watch your flowers growin'
Ain't cha got no rhymes for me?
Doo-it in doo doo, feeling groovy
Ba da da da da da da, feeling groovy
simon and garfunkel
Yep, prioritize, prioritize, and then prioritize some more.
Can your mom watch the baby for some extra time, not just when you're working?
[quote="sozobe"]Can your mom watch the baby for some extra time, not just when you're working?[/quote]
My mother lives about 45 minutes drive from me, I think I would rather lose time than gain any, if I brought her the baby to watch.
Last night though, I decided that you were right...
I went for the mentioned walk/run (about an hour) with baby and stroller, and after he was in bed decided not to do ANYTHING!
Well, I had a bath, and then went to bed with a book.
At 21:15h the phone rings, so I get up (husband calling)
At 23:00h baby is hungry!
After that I decide it'S time to go to sleep.
Wake up at 01:00h since baby is crying, but goes back to sleep.
Wake up at 02:45h since baby is crying and does not go back to sleep without another bottle.
Wake up at 06:00h since baby wants breakfast.
After that he kept bitching about some thing or other constantly, so I never really got back to sleep.
Alarmclock rings at 07:15h, I turn over and not get up till 07:40h
Then there are no clean bottles (since I did not do the dishwasher in the evening), my running stuff isn't packed, and I need to clear the car of snow.
Got to work 15 Minutes late, and decide: OK, the organization can do with some improvement.
Aw, that sounds tough.
Babies, unfortunately, are not great respecters of schedules.
Bohne--
Isn't that sweet! Baby knew you were stressed!
Believe it or not, this is the start of the baby developing empathy. Right now when he senses you're upset, is first thought is for his own comfort and safety.
Down the road, your daughter-in-law will bless you.
The problem is that the road is a very long one.
You've made it through the first month of winter. For the second month, cut back on everything but essentials--like your sanity.
Hold your dominion.
bohne.. I can sympathise with you. I have a 5 mo old. Babies are demanding. Some are more demanding.
One thing I'd first check is if your son was having enough sleep. If they are well rested during the day, they will sleep well during the night. So find out about how much napping he is doing in the daycare and if that is enough for him. Also, around 6 months babies go through a growth spurt. So they may demand an extra feed during this time (during nights as well) and that is normal.
I was putting mine to bed around 9:30 PM and that was not working. he used to get up couple times in the night. Then I started a routine of body massage and bath prior to putting him to bed at 7:30 PM. He sleeps straight through until 7:00 next morning. It has done me few good things. Like I do not have to rock him to sleep anymore. I just need to put him to bed and he drifts off to sleep by himself. So that saves a lot of time. My older one does not go to bed until 9:00. So we can spend some time together. I don't go to bed until 10:30. So me and husband can catch up on the day after the older one too is off to bed.
Have faith, this will only last so long. This phase will pass.
Bohne--
Is life any easier with a bit more daylight when the alarm goes off and your husband back in town?
Bohne--
Good for you.
Paring away inessentials is a sign of spiritual wisdom.
So is raising a beamish boy.
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