Sleep sharing

hmm interesting
I don't know about if it's part of my culture or not but I use to sleep with my grandpa and grandma when i was little. My daughter when scared has come to our room as well. I never knew of it being wrong untill I went to become a foster parent and they teach you that a child must learn to sleep in their own bed and is never aloud to sleep in foster parents bed. So they are not aloud to but I have woken up to one of the lil boys leaning on my side of the bed with his head rested on the bed and his hand holding my hand. They also frown on the kids ever sleeping in the same bed even if they are lil and same kid I have found sleeping in his brothers bead just holding hands or They'll push the beds together he'll put grover inbetween them he'll hold one of grovers hands and then his brother will hold the other one (Grover is a stuffed toy). The more I try to seperate the more they try to figure out ways to still make contact. I think some kids just need that and I don't see any ting wrong with it or dirty about it. But rules are rules and I have to live by them so no sleep sharing here lol

Bookmark...

I can see how, in a foster setting, that kind of a rule would almost make perfect sense.
The child in the home is not guaranteed to be there long enough to benefit emotionally, and psychologically from that kind of an attachment.
They move so much, that if they are given an attachment such as that, it could almost be more damage to them in the long run.

But, on the human/mother side- I think ALL children should be allowed to sleep with parents or parental FIGURES when they are scared, or uncomfortable. This is one of the places where the feeling of safety and security come from.

I am not saying they should sleep in the parents bed all their lives, but that window of safety should always be open to them .

I am not sure how much I agree with the idea that a kiddo who sleeps with their parents is subjected to sleeping problems later on in life..

simply because


how many adults you know in your life right now who cant sleep with out their parents?? We adapt as we need to


In the 60's and 70's, this kind of research and parenting outline was not widely available..


yet we are products of that and can attest to being able to sleep fine.

Our parents did not always have separate rooms, or even separate beds for us to sleep in.

Breast feeding was still a number one way to feed kiddos and the easiest way for mama to get some sleep at night and still feed her child was to have them close.

I do believe there needs to be rules in place for a child who wants to sleep with parents all the time.
But I think the rules need to come MORE from a personal space lesson then a discipline lesson.

Meaning-
This is mom's room/bed.
This is kiddos bed.
We can share at times, but I like MY stuff , just like you enjoy YOUR stuff..

rambling example.. I know..

Few quotes from the article that I posted:




I found this observation very interesting. How cultural expectations drive you towards formulating a sleeping habit.

My dad could afford only 2 bedrooms and me and my sister sleep shared until I left home to go to school. My father-in-law could afford only single bedroom and my husband and his grandma(she stayed with my in-laws) sleep shared in the living room.

But we can afford a separate room for our son and he has one. We leave our bedroom door open so that he can walk into our bed when he feels the need. Our bed always has one extra pillow for him. I would love for him to stay in his room all night but I don't want to force it either.