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Wed 22 Feb, 2006 04:31 pm
1:1: In the beginning there was mud
1:2: And the mud was without form, so we shaped it into pies. And the Spirit of God moved upon the face of the pies.
1:3: And God said, Let there be Play Dough
1:4: And God saw the Play Dough, that it was good: and God divided the colors into individual plastic cannisters.
1:5. And God said, Good deal. Keep yourself busy while I get some work done
2:1 And while God was busy with other things, Satan snuck in and made Floam
2:2 And the parent did buy it.
2:3 And the parent did wail and gnash their teeth.
2:4 And threaten to set the Floam factory afire.
2:5 For Floam was not at all like as it appeared on television where they especially don't mention the two hours of hand mixing required to make the stuff even semi-workable.
3:1 And when God saw what Satan had wrought he laughed and called the parent "Sucker".
3:2 And He ordered her into the garden to play with the mud.
3:3 And He ordered her to warn other parents about the evils of Floam.
3:4 And she fell to her knees and replied "Consider it done".
In the name of the dirt and the water and the happy mud pie
Ahem
Thank you. I was going to buy some.
Same here.
Blessed be the parent-warners.
Really and truly this stuff is a nightmare.
The container says something like - it will become separated in the storage container so SIMPLY squish it back together.
Okay.
I dumped it on the table and started mashing and the stuff went everywhere. So I scraped it into a bowl and started kneading it. An hour later I hadn't made much progress. It was stuck all over my hands and I was afraid to wash them in the sink because there is no telling what this stuff might do to the plumbing. So I scraped it all into a zip-loc bag, washed my hands and the bowl in the hose and started mashing it up again.
It is still a disaster but at least it's contained in the bag.
$7.00 for a tub of this stuff.
I am a sucker to art supply type things so I thought it might be fun.
It isn't.
hehe, guess what the internet special price is? yep, $19.95
Ugh.
I didn't trust how on the commercials they make a tiara out of it. (A tiara!?) You could just see how the moves (placing tiara on head -- most of the way, anyway) were precisely calibrated so the stuff didn't permanently stick in the girl's hair, and the traces of terror on the girl's face as she stood there grinning brightly. (TOO brightly...)
I found a pic on their website -- note how the tiara isn't actually ON the girl's, head, but being held just ABOVE it...
Evil.
I have thought about putting into the blender but I really don't want to much up my blender with 21st CENTURY POLYMER GOO!
When we were in California we passed one of those super Lego stores. Someone had made a completely 3-D old man entirely out of Legos. He was sitting on a park bench outside the store.
Some people can do wonderful things with "toys".
I'm typically pretty good with arty type stuff. I can't even get Floam to adhere to itself.
I'd suspect the error lies in the Floam, not you.
The fault, dear Boomer, lies in our Floam, and not in ourselves.
Perhaps you can use it for something truly demented. Know anyone who lost a dental plate recently? Perhaps one can be fashioned from Floam.
I am SO glad you've warned me, boomer!
Son has been pestering me about it for ages. I'm going to make him read this thread.
I am only too happy to warn others away from Floam!
My neighbor and her kids came over last night. Oldest kid got Floam for his birthday last week. Their experience was slightly better than mine.
Their first Floam was so brittle that they returned it to the store.
Their second Floam was workable with a bit less "simple mashing" than ours.
You've gotta wonder if there is any kind of quality control with this product.
If it had been cheap I think I would have tossed it and forgot it but it isn't cheap.
And Mo is pissed that he can't play with it.
I really hate Floam.
I had a cheap knock off version of floam when I was a kid, and it was really nifty, BUT only if you got a good one. Sometimes you'd buy one that hadn't been sealed properly and it would be hardened and stupid. Sometimes it would be in the first stages of getting ruined and it would be more like what you described, where it just wouldn't mix or act like its supposed to. But when you got a nice fresh one, it was cool.
I have no idea what it is but I WANT SOME
NOW YOU HEAR?
You're just gotta go and make God laugh at you, don't you Steve?
My Floam had a goo layer across the top of the beads. Mixing the goo in has been impossible. It was sealed good in a little plastic dealy with no-tamper tape around the seal. I bought two packages and they reacted exactly the same.
But, more importantly, cyphercat, are you saying that Floam is misrepresenting it's product as a 21st century miracle toy?
Damn 20th century ****.
Re: Floamageddon
boomerang wrote:
3:1 And when God saw what Satan had wrought he laughed and called the parent "Sucker".
you are a fabulous writer Boom...
( oh yeah.. thanks for the warning. I was looking at this stuff for Beans birthday next week... )
boomerang wrote:You're just gotta go and make God laugh at you, don't you Steve?
My Floam had a goo layer across the top of the beads. Mixing the goo in has been impossible. It was sealed good in a little plastic dealy with no-tamper tape around the seal. I bought two packages and they reacted exactly the same.
But, more importantly, cyphercat, are you saying that Floam is misrepresenting it's product as a 21st century miracle toy?
Damn 20th century ****.
look i'm being serious now. Unless you tell me what the *** this goddam floamypukeshit is
I'm really gonna lose it...
Now ... WHAT IS IT
and can I have some
please
Floam is made from maggot embryos and sea monkey vomit using a special formula developed by Satan.
That's about the best I can describe it.
Send my your address and I will happily send you to zip-loc bags partially filled with Floam.
Really though, I'd rather send it to someone I hate but pretend to like. Kind of a Floam voodo parcel.
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