France Invades U.S. (Part 1)

A real bloody genius ain't he ... compared to a mushroom ... almost!

Anon

Wow! Didn't know we had this many supporters of the cheese-eating surrender monkeys.

It sucks when someone attacks your country, or any country other than the US, huh?

Nobody would object if you would lay down the views you hold about France or the French government in a sophisticated, well-articulated way.

If you're not capable of doing so, it just says a lot about you.

Few, if any, nations act in the interests of others. The best that can be said is that nations ocasionally share interests (often for different reasons) and it becomes necessary to act in concert. France aided The U.S. because we shared a common enemy; England. The U.S. helped France because an unopposed Germany would have eventually threatened The U.S.

Solidarity between nations lasts only as long each side has something to gain from it.

Hey! This guys telling the truth and isn't taking sides.

What the hells wrong with him?!?! sounds like trouble to me come on everybody! Let's get'em!!!!!!

Really. Come in here and cause a ruckus like that!

The nerve of some people. Doesn't he know we've been degrading eachother like this for 7 years now.

We're Americans god damn it!!!! this is how we get sh!t done. We love to hate each other.

Intill we figure out what the f**k we're doing theres going to be sh!t blowing up everywhere!

Hell, from time to time we blow eachother up!!!It takes the guess work out.

And whoevers left buys the beer.

Do you frenchies honor de gaulle as a hero???

And now it looks like France might come to the aid of our own citizens because they've been abandoned by their own government. WHILE WE WATCH!

Typical pseudo-enlightened thinking.

Nations are a sum of individuals and act such.

Solidarity between nations lasts as long each side has nothing to loose from it, just like individuals.

Knowing your usual narrow views of "honor" (and your other views for the matter), I'd say you are not here to promote a debate.

But I'll tell you that the French do not honor De Gaulle as a hero but as a man of honor.

You just can't be a real man of honor until you've betrayed your people, lied to them, led them into a bullshit war, and get your youth killed and mutilated! Of course, you must slaughter as many of the invaded nations civilians as possible!!

Now there'a a man of honor for you!

Anon

I guess we are not talking about the same man, Anon :wink:

That's a fact! The American definition of honor has taken a whole new meaning since The Chimp in Chief took over

Anon

I don't know a whole lot about DeGaulle, but from what I do know, he was very arrogant and ungrateful of America's help in liberating his country. I could be wrong though, this is just from the small amount I have read about him.

France Invades U.S. (Part 2)
France Invades U.S. (Part 2)

Heavy fighting continued across major US cities today as French "Liberation" forces surrounded Virginia Beach, Va. in a showdown with Christian fundamentalist and High Priest Pat Robertson. Robertson was believed to be hiding in a church in Virginia Beach.

Robertson's 700 "Club" was bracing for the French assault and vowed to "die fighting rather than surrender."

French Général Jean Abizaid, in a news conference in occupied Washington, D.C., vowed to "capture Robertson and bring him to justice."

Robertson, a little-known evangelist, became a symbol of national American resistance after the interim president and U.S. civilian administrator Dominique de Villepin closed Robertson's Christian Broadcasting Network. De Villepin claimed the CBN was fomenting Christian radicalism and inciting violence.

Robertson mockingly referred to de Villepin as an "evil-doer" and said that God told him "George Bush will soon be returned to power."

A spokesman for French President Jacques Chirac said such remarks "are not helpful" and can only serve to inflame an already delicate situation. Bush was recently arrested after a tip from an American "patriot" led French forces to his spider hole near his ranch in Crawford, Texas .

Over 1,000 American civilians have been killed this month by French snipers, while helicopters fired rockets and German made machine-guns strafed homes and churches.

Americans, initially in fear of French and German coalition forces are now turning to anger as mounting casualties stretch along wider portions of the United States.

The fragile American council, that took power, has become increasing concerned about the heavy handed military tactics used by the French forces against the occupied Americans. German coalition forces occupying the southeast portion of the country expressed growing dissatisfaction as well. One anonymous German Field Marshall criticized the French for excessive use of force and declared the French "are behaving like Nazis."

In a news conference Chirac defended the use of force against the American civilians saying that the insurgency was caused by troublemakers and "freedom hating" terrorists. Coupled with former Republican "God" remnants and Conservative Party loyalists, these holdovers of the former regime of George W. Bush "will be defeated and they will not deter the French from bringing peace and democracy to the silent majority of American people, " noted Chirac.

Chirac looked somber and tired during the news conference but felt that the American occupation was going well. When asked about the growing number of French casualties, Chirac replied, "C'est La Guerre."

With his poll numbers dropping below 40 percent approval for the first time in his presidency, Chirac is coming under increased criticism by the French media and socialist candidate for president, Jean Francois Kerre.

Kerre`, a decorated war hero who served during the French occupation of Vietnam in the 1950s, is the likely candidate from the Socialist party to oppose Chirac in France's November elections. Wounded at France's defeat at Dien Bien Phu, Kerre returned to Paris in the 1950s and opposed the French occupation of Vietnam and later Algeria. Kerre initially supported Chirac's decision to invade the United States but now, with French public support collapsing, he has become harshly critical of Chirac's policies. In a recent speech Kerre mocked Chirac with, "I have three words for Chirac: 'C'est La Guerre.'"

If elected president, Kerre's plan to bring peace and democracy to the United States is to share authority in America with "Old Europe."

Chirac's vice president, Alphonse Francois de Sade, known as "Marquis," continues to insist that America is stockpiling weapons of mass destruction and that the American invasion is going according to plan.

According to Vice President de Sade, it is likely that chemical, biological and nuclear weapons were moved to either Canada or Mexico.

Vice President de Sade warned Canadian Prime Minister Paul Martin and Mexican President Vicente Fox that they, too, risk invasion if they don't stop American terrorists from smuggling banned weapons into Canada and Mexico respectively.

De Sade added, "Canada and Mexico must improve security along their borders with America."

Prime Minister Martin and President Fox vehemently denied storing banned American weapons. French separatists in Quebec concurred with de Sade's remarks and supported his ultimatum.

Short on food and clean water, with no electricity, and casualties estimated to be nearing 50,000 dead and 200,000 wounded, the plight of the Americans under French occupation is beginning to attract world condemnation.

Chirac, at a press conference with Egyptian President Hosni Mubarak, said that he was praying for casualties to ebb in America.

"Every day I pray there are fewer French casualties, but I know what we are doing in America is right," noted Chirac. He mentioned nothing about American casualties.

"C'est la vie," concluded Chirac.

France Invades U.S. Part 3-10 can be viewed here:
http://jerryghinelli.com/index.htm

I, for one, would welcome our new Franco-German overlords.

While this is supposed to be satire,for it to work there should be a grain of truth in it.

There is no way that a Franco German invasion force would ever be able to reach the US.
We control the Atlantic ocean.NOTHING moves that we dont know about.
The Atlantic fleet would make mincemeat of any approaching invasion fleet.

So,while this might be funny,lets all be aware that it is not possible,or even remotely realistic.

Might be true. However, the worst attack on the United States in recent times was not perpetrated by an approaching invasion fleet, but by a couple of guys with box cutters. And America was not up to it.