You're favourite quips?

Well, hot diggity, momma! c.i.

Suck it, Frenchie!!!

Bite me, because it is the only insult they allow me other than Suck it, Frenchie on Extreme Politics.

I HATE those things!

I experienced a friend, lo not so far from this very place, tormenting me the other day by "whatevering" and "soing" me!!! Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrgggghhhhhhhh!

I like, in theory, (I would not use them, except in jest!) "So, what makes you mistake me for someone who GIVES a damn?" and "Your mouth is moving, but nothing that makes any sense is coming out."

I have a silly habit, sometimes, of saying, when the phone rings, in a very dry voice: "That'll be the phone", or echoing Dorothy Parker's "What fresh hell is this", especially at work.

Last time I flew in to Oz from overseas, my exhaustion made me not notice the activities of the custooms lady with the drug-seeking Beagle of Doom, until she ordered me, very rudely, to put my bag down so the beagle could do its job. I found myself uttering Bart Simpson's famous: "All right, lady, don't have a cow!"

"And I should care...why, exactly?"

I amused an Aussie on a trip from university by commenting on a very loud American woman's constant prattle: "I really hope that SOMEONE is interested in what she's saying"...apparently it was a very British style of put down!

kitchenpete, American women also talk in movie theatres when the main feature is playing. I must remember that quip as I'm sure there will be ample opportunity to use it. c.i.

Franlky, my dear, I don't give a damn! Gotta love that one. :-)

My friends are "sick and tired" of hearing me say: "Absitively, posolutely", (my favorite), but I'm "fed up to the hilt" with hearing them say: "Whatever floats your boat", particularly when I'm praising A2K.
You know what I mean.

i get your drift

I see you get the message, Dyslexia. And if they get my dander up, I tell them to "sit down, you're rockin' the boat".

Hmm...so many, so little time...

Always been a fan of the all-purpose 'I'm in therapy, please stop, I may snap.' Always works, especially with chatty cab drivers.

'Haltz Maal (sic)' for the German fans...

A good one for a mugging: 'Dude, not only will I give you my credit cards, I will sign them over to you as well, so YOU can deal with the payments.'

Then there is good ole 'You must be one of God's 'special' people?'

Heh heh...deb, love that Dorothy Parker quote...do you think there is a relationship between good quips and ?

Not exactly a quip, but I always love using this line at a dinner party (to the woman on my left, usually!):

"It's not the menu that matters, it's the men you sit next to"

My soon-to-be mother-in-law said "The job of the mother-in-law is to keep her mouth zipped and wear beige". (Hope she does)

"This is NOT a news flash!" - For when things are obvious

"faceless shakedown devils" - I called amazon.com this today in a discussion with a friend

"Do NOT disturb The Sexy". When people are irritating. My friend uses this as his motto.

"The man who pays the piper calls the tune."
"Kiss my shiny white ass."
"This looks like the work of the brain trust". I work with highly educated people that seriously cannot tie their shoelaces.


....I could go on and on......

enough about me, what do you think about me?

"Laugh, I nearly did"

Your butter I don't need.

ooohhhhh.....I like that one, kitchenpete!

For stars: "And you are...."

That really pisses them off.