Getting more pissed

Good for you, osso. It does get under your skin, doesn't it.

I'm feeling a lot better about it after spilling my guts. Thanks guys.

Can so see why it eats at you, too. Not sure of my recommendation yet -- perhaps investigating the ehBeth angle further. One argument there is that every woman before you who just let 'em get away with it paved the way for the treatment you got -- it could be satisfying to be the one to stop that, if it truly is gender discrimination (and Fishin' lays out some of the ways that could be hard to determine).

I can also see though that it'd be mentally healthier to just leave it there, start fresh, clean slate, tootaloo.

Definitely mentally healthier to leave on your terms.

Thinking, that if I were you now, a few dozens of years after my little episode, that I would write a letter. I wouldn't rush it, would let it sit a bit and word it well. Also not sure I'd go for legal type, but more to affect general well being, what can you add?

A quiet well thought out comment, Word it well and send it to several.

You aren't trying to change legalities - well, perhaps - you are trying to wake up vision.

Duckie, I had a very similar experience at a job back in the 80s. A coworker (who had the exact job as I had) left his paystub where he knew I'd see it. He was making double my salary.

I went to talk to our (female) boss. She gave me an amazingly sexist explanation about how he had a family, etc. and how they couldn't afford to raise my salary at all. I left shortly after that. He ended doing both our jobs, so perhaps he had to earn that salary after all.

Do what you think is best for you - speaking to the other woman there makes sense.

I agree with that, re talking to the other woman.

I also experienced the thing of having a beginner showing up under the wing of a colleague and myself, depending on the job. He was a flubbup.

She is now head of such and such and I have had my own practice, referencing the long term. But our then boss paid him equal or maybe, I'm wrong, 50 cents less an hour, because he was a guy. In the meantime she and I separately worked multiply more, oh never mind, he was twit.

He was a dolt on feet.


Let me interject to say, I welcome nondolts.

This sounds whiny from me.

But

my boss did explain he was paid near the same as us, the project managers, because he was a guy and had needs.

No kidding.

Ugh. I guess I don't really have much to complain about after hearing your stories. And the twit factor plays big in this situation (thanks osso).

My director acknowledged that my pay was "inequitable" but didn't offer to do anything about it and didn't offer any explanations. If I had to guess, I'd say they just paid me the lowest amount they thought they could and I, like an ass, took it thinking it was adequate for the area without doing any research. I do think that when deciding what they think someone would take they took into account that I was a woman and would accept less. Sadly, I proved that assumption correct. I'm correcting it now.

I'm going to talk to the other woman today. If my hunch is correct, she makes less than new guy too. Maybe I can get her to complain.

Freeduck,

maybe this will make you feel better...focus on the company and not your team or others highered in your position and think about this...in order to replace you, which they no doubt have to do (of course how could they truly replace you), they have interview, hire, and train someone, all which costs money. the training could take weeks to months so nothing much will get accomplished during that time and the company will be out cash (not to mention the interview time) as opposed to just giving you the raise you deserve (which is generally speaking more financially sound). its always harder on the company to hire someone new. so you are in effect screwing them.

i know how you feel, i found out i was making less than a peer of mine who i had 4 years more exp. than and i had a master's degree which she didn't. their response, well she was single and i had two incomes, so i didn't need as much...wtf?

think about this too, you know what you are worth, and finding yourself in a position where you weren't getting that, instead of compromising and just doing nothing about it, you tried to work with your current company and when finding out they were a bunch of jerks, went out and found something that was worthy of your skills. that speaks miles about the person within.

its their loss...and though they will never admit to you what your leaving will do to them, it will hurt. it is women like you that are leveling the playing field for women in the workforce-women who know what they are worth and fight for it.

way to go girl! ooh now i am feeling all women powerish!

plus...now you get to go to falcon's games....i'm coming to visit!

Ha ha. Thanks for those words dragon. It's so nice to know I'm not the only one who has been screwed and you are so right about what it will take them to replace me. I think about that a lot. If it were my company, it would be very important to me to hire and keep good people. It's not a priority here and that says a lot about the company. Enough that I don't want to work here.

Thanks everyone for all the kind words. I really can't tell you how much I appreciate it.

I haven't read this entire thread, but was wondering if the person was hired before or after you had put in your letter of resignation.

That would make a tremendous difference if you plan on considering legal action.

He was hired before. It was one of the things that accelerated my job search.

Have you ever considered changing your name to PissedDuck?

Only temporarily.

On the bright side, I was in Georgia recently, not Atlanta, but north of there. Beautiful country.

I think it's beautiful too. My dad is from there and I've always loved visiting. Lots of trees, not as flat as Florida, not as backwoods as some other deep south states (sorry other deep south state residents). I think it's going to be an excellent move.

did i mention already that the falcons play there? oh yeah i did...


i just love football so i get distracted when anyone says anything about a city with a pro team...my little va. beach doesn't have any

when it was up to me to hire someone, if i found someone good, i did everything i could to hang on to them. i had one girl who i swear would try to find other jobs just to get a raise...as in she knew i would counter every time because she was that good. its amazing to me that many companies would rather have to take the time and money to find someone else than give the good person they already have a raise. i mean cmon (my master's was concentrated in finance) its much cheaper (not only nominally but from a productivity/morale/stuff you can't measure aspect) to give a person what they are worth than cycle through people. why is that so hard for people to understand?

good thing you're moving on freeduck, your old company is financially doomed

I think that's true. It's very top-heavy and very disconnected. I don't think it will make it much further without a major upheaval.

It's your LAST FRIDAY!!!!

Whoopeee! Thanks for the reminder, Eva. I'm in such a better mood today. I'm beginning to think I'm manic. I think that dumping it all out here has helped a lot.

remember, replace all coffee with decaffinated...see how they like that come monday morning...