Swimpy, I meant to say this earlier and forgot - We HAVE contacted DHS. They told us that we represented a "contigency plan" to ensure that the child was cared for. Since we aren't trying to push the kid out of the house and he isn't suffering any abuse then there is nothing they can do. The did tell us to call back if we felt the child was being taken to a dangerous situation.
We don't want to force the issue to the point where the child is in danger so we're just dealing with it each day. Some days we deal with it better than others but we are willing to make some big sacrifices for him.
Definitely angelic. I know it probably doesn't feel that way to you, but wow.
I think it is so sad that DHS can't off you more support. If you were "official" foster parents there would be services available. You are saving the state quite a bit of money.
boomerang, I don't know the history behind why you have the child in your physical care or how much contact the parents have with him day-to-day, but if, for example, God forbid, he should need emergency medical care, who would/could consent on the spot?
Under Oregon law (national law?) anyone can take a seriously ill or injured child to the emergency room.
As I've warned the parents, should this happen the story is bound to come out (honestly, having the story come out to someone who might be able to help would be a relief) and that it is going to be a lot harder for them to deal with the reprocussions that way than if they were to just assign temporary custody to us.
I've also pointed out that by assigning such custody that I could put him on my health inurance and most likely avoid such an event in the first place.
If such a thing were to happen I do have a friend who is on the board of the area's best children's hospital. She is the director of a children's charity I do a lot of work with - and give a lot of money to; there is a area of the hosiptal named in memory of her daughter. At least there will be someone who can readily vouch for my character.