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Fri 4 Jan, 2019 06:57 pm
This is kinda an update to my last post. Sorry it's long, but I thought it was best to get everything out there about how the situation went down. I'll ask for adivce at the end.
So, as it turns out, the neo-straight guy that kept making advances towards me is legitimately interested. Appearently he tried finding me online, but I don't have a phone or any presence on social media (I'm just not into that stuff), so he had no idea how to get my attention without people noticing.
He told me that in his mind the best other way to finally get my attention was to "make a scene by dropping my hands on your desk, and maybe flirt with you and play it off as another joke," among other dumb as all hell ideas (that one was the last attempt).
I don't ******* understand his reasoning either. I mean, that doesn't come off well when you do it to one of the only out guys in school. He's lucky I had no friends in that class because they would have beat the **** out of him.
Anyways, I found this out when we had a talk after school today. He got sick of waiting for me to confront him, so he slipped a note to me that said to meet him after school (no idea why he didn't do that in the first place).
However, I couldn't stay after school because my parents are strict about getting home on time, and I have no phone to tell them I'll be late. I met with him for a second and told him to piss off, but he followed me home and told me everything instead.
So, here's the thing. I've never had a boyfriend before. I don't know what it's like or what I want. This is where I need advice. Would a relationship with him be worth it?
Cons:
-He's already asserted himself as a dumbass.
-He hasn't come out yet because of his parents, so we can't show our relationship at school.
-I don't do internet communication or use any phones.
Pros:
-Although he is a dumbass, he is not an ass. He has a heart of gold under that guard he puts up because of his parents.
-I've always loved his humor, which is why I never got mad when he'd flirt with me; for the longest time I couldn't see past it being anything other than a funny joke (until he got more aggressive).
-We both like working out. He actually does wrestling, which yes, I made sure to make a few jokes about (they were received positively).
-We're both into economics, which is why my books I carry around school originally caught his attraction towards me. That came as a total surprise because I've never once heard him mention it, but when I pressed he knew his ****.
-He'd be a ticket to losing my virginity, and to a pretty sexy man at that...when he wears plaid...god save me...
So um, yeah. I hate asking the internet to help me out here, but I won't see my friends until Monday, and I don't like talking about this stuff to my parents. You're what I have to turn to.
If any of you have even vaguely been in this situation, your insight is valued. Even if you haven't I'm sure you're smarter than an inexperienced youngster regarding relationships.
Thank you to anyone who replies!
@Dallas-T,
Hello!
You seem to really like this guy, and if he likes you too, why not try?
The fact that you can not show up as officially together because he did not do his CO is perhaps not that bad for the moment. Give him time, and give you some time to discover each other. As long as you're happy together, that's the main thing, right?
By the way, I know it's a bit off-topic, but maybe I'll advise you, if it's not to put you on social networks, but to have a phone. It would be easier to join him like the others, but then it's up to you ^^
Well, I hope that what I wrote will help you in one way or another. Good luck!
You two have a long way to go before you consider an intense relationship - and that includes even spending some friendship time together. That has not happened.
Spend some time getting to know each other. He asked you to meet after school. Set that up again, maybe as a study session at a local coffee shop or library.
There's a lot going on in your head. Try to slow down and take each step.
@PUNKEY,
Hahaha, isn't that some advice I've been given all my life? Those close to me constantly harangue on how I'm being too intense. It'd probably do some good to get out of my own head, but it's so damn fun up here!
Thanks Punkey. I've read some of your other posts, and you seem to ration out great advice. Whoever you may be in real life, I hope to god the people around you appreciate that.
@Dageron,
You're right, and I'll do exactly that.
I've already accepted an invitation of his to meet at the park this weekend. In taking Punkey's advice, we're going to form more of a platonic relationship before jumping straight for the hormones. My hope is that this will go further, but who knows?
And no, I refuse to get a phone. I know it would make my life easier, but I also know that it would make my life 10x harder in terms of accomplishing goals. I've got to guard the few brain cells I have, you know?
@Dallas-T,
Oh I understand, I didn't want to force you to buy one you know ^^
Going back to the main topic, I also find Punkey's advice wise. By learning to know your crush, you'll see if you're compatible or not. In addition, too much racing will bring you nothing good. Try to keep a cool head, even if it goes well (well I haven't said that passion has to be absent, but just don't get too excited before you know him better).
I hope it'll work between you and this guy :-)
Good luck!
@Dallas-T,
From one Dallas to another good luck!
I would definitely just start out with simple friendship like the others recommended, just so you two get a feel for each other. Plus if he's not out that puts less pressure on him in case his family got suspicious. Good Luck D :DDD
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