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wife no orgasm

 
 
mikmak
 
Reply Fri 31 Aug, 2018 06:58 am
hi
I am together with my wife for 25 years and she never had an orgasm during intercource , she doesn't like when I touch her vagina and she doesn't like oral. She comes with vibrator but she likes it more and comes faster when I am not there. seems her clit is only sensitive for high vibrations. when I discus the topic she is saying there is nothing wrong with me. But I read a lot about it and its basically her responsibility. I am really confused because I have feeling we are not bonding in the right way because of this. I feel like I am trying to play tennis but never get the ball back...
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maxdancona
 
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Reply Fri 31 Aug, 2018 08:57 am
@mikmak,
I think I understand what you are feeling. I would find it very difficult if my partner told me that I couldn't touch her or give her oral sex; it puts restrictions on sexual expression.

I think don't think the issue here is her orgasms. It is what you need for your own sexuality. I agree that her orgasms are hers... but your feelings are important too and it sounds like you are not getting what you need from this physical relationship. I would express it this way, it is OK for you to express what you need... rather than taking responsibility for what she needs.

Saying "I need you to have an orgasm" isn't realistic. Saying "I feel restricted, and I need the freedom to touch you, or pleasure you because this is important to me" is fair because you are expressing your desires, rather than taking control of hers.

I assume you have been talking to her about this with her. Have you tried marriage counseling?


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