eye contact

CJ, I tend to avoid generalizations but this is what I've seen:

Women that come from small towns seem to be the ones that avoid eye contact as a sign of respect (maybe fear) to men.

In my experience most people look away when seen in the eyes, if they can, they'll look back after some seconds to see if you're still looking at them.

ditto for me. My name for it is losing at the eye-contact chicken game.

There is also some painful eye-contact dynamics during first-dates (all 7 or so of them) for me, whereby a prolonged eye-contact is a sign of something, but I never have fully understood what that something is...so I'd lose the chicken-game again, which would occasion quite an awkward aftermath.

Maybe long eye contact allows them to see inside your soul. Bush looked into Putins eyes, and he said......

"...this man is full of strategery and compassionation"

Haha, probably not

gravy, when you're on a first date, you should show more
intimacy with eye contact. There comes a point when
you look into each others eyes, and sparks fly. If nothing
happens, there won't be a second date.

Well, here's the answer, Diane has green eyes, wonderful, famously wonderful, green eyes.

Me, I was seemingly born shy and worked my way out of it towards age 20, ever so slowly, and by forty had gotten my second wind. Now I just look at people as seems appropriate, in the eye as seems appropriate. No I don't stare them down, but I don't think I give in either. Depends on the situation, usually situations aren't about staring down, but about connecting at all.

But then, I'm from California. I am fairly straightforward, for better or worse.

Hehe, aren't we osso I'm actually used to people looking me
into the eyes, since my eyes are green as well. Green with
some kind of sprinkle and that seems to be intriguing to
some.

Californians do tend to look you innocently and open in your eyes. Children have the same quality, they can look at
you for a very long time.

I'm in a relatively isolated part of California for the last five years, slightly more relaxed, especially re traffic, but I have to say, no more or less friendly than Marina del Rey/Venice.
(anyone remember my post about my visit back after a couple of years and my going to a Different post office and hearing a voice yell, Stop That Woman, and it being Eartha, the postwoman who had transferred p.o.'s in the meantime, who recognized me, gasp, from the back....) Nobody can tell me the large city is cold...
(and wondering what happened with Saleh...)

Five seconds is a long time to be looking at another person, imo, unless you're trying to get somewhere with them: flirting, answering a tough question or demanding a response.

I've been (you'll laugh) timing my own looking at people. One or two seconds is about it. I look at every clerk who helps me until they make eye contact. I find I cannot stand to have someone help me who acts like an automaton and keeps their head ducked.

I don't make eye contact with every driver, just the ones who might hit me in intersections or who come close while turning.

I don't make eye contact with everyone who walks by (that would be exhausting). Interestingly, it was in the art museums where people seemed least likely to meet a friendly gaze or, if they met it, didn't respond. I felt like I was a painting that maybe wasn't quite up to snuff.