Eryemil wrote:Anti, sometimes you scare me ^^'
Quote:I am glad to see you join the bloodbath. At first I was going to lock the thread but I've found a new guilty pleasure in watching these people squirm.
I'm the reason that you keep a thread open... Seriously Ery do you really think I need my ego boosted?
thunderrunner wrote:Please give me one contradiction that cannot be explained by understanding of the bible as a whole.
<sigh> if I do the response will be "oh but that's a metaphor" or "you're taking it out of context" or "it makes perfect sense in ancient aramaic"... but okay.... I'll bite.
What happened that famous Easter? We've got four stories here which agree on a few vague points but hardly seem to match up. Let's just pick a single scene out here, Jesus has carked it and been put away into his tomb. People are about to go find the empty tomb, pretty important scene right?
So okay, Mary goes... Or was it the two Marys? Or did Mary go there on the way to the toilet and thus bring all her female friends? Hell let's say they all went and some of the writers just didn't mention the gawkers. That's cool.
So they get there and the stone's still sitting there. They're thinking "bugger, how the hell am I going to move this stone" when suddenly an angel moves it.
No wait, that's not right, they get there and the stone's gone and there's this young guy sitting inside. Or hang on, was that two guys in shining robes or maybe two angels?
So the young guy tells them to talk to the disciples and tell them to go to Galilee. Or was that Jerusalem? Maybe Angels mutter or something, or they have to be interpreted through some kind of John Edwards guy, "let's see I'm getting a G sounding word, like Galillee or maybe Jerusalem. This ringing a bell for anyone?"
These women or I mean the woman, or whoever the hell was there goes and tells the disciples. I mean she keeps quiet and doesn't tell anyone. Okay, she doesn't tell anyone for a few minutes and then gabs it around town, that works.
But, on the way back to the town Jesus appears before the two marys, I mean one mary but she didn't recognise him and they recognised him and they go over and worship. Well actually they didn't see Jesus at all but a vision of angels told her that Jesus was alive so it was all okay.
So they go to Galilee and meet Jesus, except they don't because they just hang around in a room in Jerusalem instead. Okay, so they're all wherever they are all eleven of them, except Didymus isn't there right so there's ten of them, he must have gotten confused and gone to the other place instead.
They're all sitting there when Jesus rocks up and they're all really happy to see him. Which is to say they were scared shitless about the ghost they saw. So jesus says hi, how's it going? asks for some fish and talks a bit about salvation. Except he doesn't and he shouts at them for not believing. But he appears before them all, (except didymus who's not there) and they do believe but didymus doesn't so he gets back and jesus appears yet again and didymus fingers his holes.
....
Anyone else a little confused about what actually happened? But nah, it's a perfect book. No contradictions.
