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Mon 19 Mar, 2018 07:41 pm
So, I met this guy on tinder almost a month ago. Everything was great in the first week of "getting to know each other and make sure you're not serial killer" phase. He asked me out, I said yes. The day of the date, he texted me and said "I'm so hungover and I have work in an hour, I dont think today will work." And I was upset about this and expressed that to him. He apologized and I gave him a second chance because we get along great, we share humor, we both find each other attractive, etc. It's since then been 2 and a half weeks and has yet to find time to ask me out. I brought it up to him yesterday about not knowing how much longer I could do this sole texting thing and how I didn't want to push us dating, but we could go out and see where things go. He responded with the "I'm not ready for a relationship and I know you are. I'm kind of nervous to meet you because you're perfect and blah blah blah." Didn't make any effort to say, "we can meet up and just see where things go! no pressure or anything." Since then, we've been texting and snap chatting and stuff but I'm just gently confused as to what he wants. I've stopped snapchatting him and resorted solely to text since he begs to see my face and I feel like that is somewhat of a "luxury" if that makes sense. He voluntarily talks and seeks me out but doesn't make an effort to actually meet up? He works 45+ hours and goes to school but he has time to go out with friends on the weekend, etc. I'm such an idiot for this guy, everything I could possibly want. Is it worth it to wait and keep texting him and see if he changes or am I just holding onto a dream here?
@oliwia,
Ask him to let you know when he's available to meet in person. If you're still around then, go out for a coffee. Back off on online contact til he's done that.
Quote:hey, I'd love to go for a coffee sometime. I get that you're super busy so let me know when you're free and if I'm around we can do that. if not, that's cool. No need to reply til you've got some time for a coffee get-together
it will be up to him. if he sets something up - good. if not, that's fine too.
Until then, feel free to move on and meet other people.
You've got no obligation to hang around and wait for him to be ready to meet you.
@oliwia,
oliwia wrote:Is it worth it to wait and keep texting him and see if he changes or am I just holding onto a dream here?
well overall - don't expect him to change
there's really nothing dreamy in what you're describing -he's a guy who doésn't really have time for you in his life right now
Something very fishy here. He may not be what you think he is.
Sounds like you are a “side” thing -online only.
Insist on meeting in person.