Reply
Sun 2 Jul, 2017 11:47 pm
I've been with my girlfriend for 2 and a half years, almost 3, and I'm thinking about leaving her, I've never had that tought before because I was
always comfortable, we've never gotten into serious fights, the fights we did have, always ended after a few hours. I've always been kind of depressed/anxious, that makes me think alots, and lately I've wondering if I'm really happy with her, I think I love her, when I'm with her, I feel happy, but at the same time, when I'm at home, I rarely have the motivation to go see her, I'm constantly looking at other women when I'm out with friends, I even flirt. I know I'm not going to do anything because it's a rule I've set for myself, but I don't know if I'm staying with her because of that rule, or if I actually love her. She's also really in love with me, I tried sliding in that conversation, she got really down, I felt bad so I went to see her, and fixed up everything. But it's still something that bothers me. She's a wonderful person and I don't want to break her heart, but at the same time, I feel like I want to have experiences with other people. She won't accept me messing around with other girls if we were ever to go on 'break', she'd rather leave me. I don't know to make of all of this. I don't know if this is just because I'm thinking too much, or I'm getting tired of her..I've only recently been thinking about this.
@aConfusedGuy,
aConfusedGuy wrote:
I've been with my girlfriend for 2 and a half years, almost 3, and I'm thinking about leaving her, I've never had that tought before because I was
always comfortable, we've never gotten into serious fights, the fights we did have, always ended after a few hours. I've always been kind of depressed/anxious, that makes me think alots, and lately I've wondering if I'm really happy with her, I think I love her, when I'm with her, I feel happy, but at the same time, when I'm at home, I rarely have the motivation to go see her, I'm constantly looking at other women when I'm out with friends, I even flirt. I know I'm not going to do anything because it's a rule I've set for myself, but I don't know if I'm staying with her because of that rule, or if I actually love her. She's also really in love with me, I tried sliding in that conversation, she got really down, I felt bad so I went to see her, and fixed up everything. But it's still something that bothers me. She's a wonderful person and I don't want to break her heart, but at the same time, I feel like I want to have experiences with other people. She won't accept me messing around with other girls if we were ever to go on 'break', she'd rather leave me. I don't know to make of all of this. I don't know if this is just because I'm thinking too much, or I'm getting tired of her..I've only recently been thinking about this.
Essentially you've seen the movie too many times. You might think it's a good one but nothing new happens, no surprises, no thrill of discovery.
You either move on or you find a way to turn up the volume to eleventeen. What I mean is, relationship stagnation is 50% your fault. This means you have half the work to do to toss in unexpected excitement. If you aren't willing to do this then examine why? Does she not respond? Do you already know the result and it's dull?
I am not a good person to ask about monogamy because I think we really are not meant to be. Sure if you can make it work, then great, that's awesome. But nothing we ever do is the same song and dance ever.
We constantly change clothing style, music taste, food pallet, even friends. Yet we are suppose to pick one person to be romantic with forever? How does that stand up to reason?
So I guess my advice is. Try to turn it up or change the station.
@aConfusedGuy,
The end of a relationship does not have to be a big screaming fight. You can consider someone to be a good person but just not have chemistry anymore.
I would say, you need to talk. Try to get past tears or accusations. Be kind about it. The old tried and true line is, "I don't think this is working out."
Breaking up is bound to be painful. So dont rush to make her feel better if you make the break. Thats not fair to her.
Make up your mind. Its not fair to be wishy washy. Thats demeaning to her and makes you resentful.
Stumble It!
Tweet This
Bookmark on Delicious
Share on Facebook
Share on MySpace