Did I actually like him?

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I have been working at my job for half a year now, and since January I have been texting a guy from work, we had been texting for a long time and flirting with each other when my friend who is a girl and also works at the same place, told me that they went on a date once back in December and that he keeps coming back to her telling her that he was stupid to let her go. I let this slide since he told me that he liked me and wanted to date me. Also he didn't know that she told me that they had been on a date.
I thought I really liked him but we dated for only a month when we decided that we would be better as friends and broke up.
Now my friend and the guy are actually dating again. She did tell hem that I knew about them and she knew about us.
I thought I would be fine with it but lately, I have been feeling so empty, sad and betrayed.
Did I actually like him and am I jealous?

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@GirlBoss,

Your friend should be the one who's annoyed with you.

Let it go - and don't flirt with/date people you work with.

2 Replies

@ehBeth,

Quote:

Let it go - and don't flirt with/date people you work with.

How boring...

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@ehBeth,

This is a lesson learned by many many people over the years, though not often right away. It's sort of like a ball game: most often the balls don't fly out of the park, players strike out. There are other sayings that have accrued over time about actually fooling around at work, the most cogent I remember as "don't **** where you eat".

I did have a friend who dated and then married a guy, a salesman to their company, who was expressly among the numbers of those noted in the corporate rules as no-no's. Sometime later, she started her own company, and I think they are still together.

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@ossobucotemp,

I think it can work out but it's not something for young daters/employees to mess around with. Some maturity/cool achieved over time helps.

1 Reply

@ehBeth,

I'm not without fooling around episodes myself, and I'm not, even now, actually sorry at all. But I do agree it's often a dumb move, dumber for the women, in corporate rules or not, in 2017.

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@ossobucotemp,

"don't **** where you eat"

I just thought this was worth repeating. There are (literally) billions of other folks out there, why fixate on the one you work with? You have a job to work, or at least that's probably what's expected in return for your paycheck. Stop using your employer as your own personal Tinder, work, and date on your own time. You'll find life is much simpler, and yes, Max, boring.

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@tibbleinparadise,

listening

0 Replies

@ossobucotemp,

ossobucotemp wrote:

I'm not without fooling around episodes myself,

What do custard pies, red noses and buckets of "water" filled with confetti have to do with any of this?

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@GirlBoss,

Quote:

I have been feeling so empty, sad and betrayed.

Don't feel sad and betrayed.

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@GirlBoss,

I seems like you're jealous, indeed. But from your story, you have no real reason to feel betrayed. Seems he went back to her once you broke up.

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@GirlBoss,

Quote:

Did I actually like him

How should we know whether you like him or not? Sounds like you do, but come on. We can give advice but we sure cannot read your mind.

Quote:

am I jealous?

Again, we can only guess. But it sounds like you might be a bit jealous. Not sure why. The two of you gave it a go and decided you were better off just being friends. Since this seems to have been a mutual decision, why would you get jealous when this guy starts dating a friend?

Anyway, I'm sure there is someone out there just right for you. Be happy for your friend and this guy and concentrate on finding someone to make you happy. Good luck.

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I would assume he does pickup like I do, he probably talks to a few people and that's how he got you and your friend by putting himself out there. It's not personal you were the 2nd person he was with so you can't really be upset with your friend in anyway but I get why you feel sad it's normal to feel sad and alone now and again. But do things in your life that make you happy! For me it's the gym 7 days a week, I also like talking to girls so I make sure to do it AT LEAST 2 times a week to improve this skill. Think what you want make a game plan and go after it. But to answer the question move on and talk to guys you don't work with. This way you can talk to way more people and you don't have to worry if they don't like you because most likely you are never going to see them again.

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Did I actually like him?

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