In love with a narcissist?

Reply Tue 24 Jan, 2017 05:30 pm
I didn't want to admit it at first but I think my boyfriend is a narcissist just slightly. He still functions normally but people are attracted to people like Donald trump. He makes fun of people all the time. I feel like I'm the only person who knows how bad it it is because we spend so much of our day together. He's emotionally abusive to me and he never apologizes for a lot of things. I accepted a long time ago he'd never be one of those sap talkers but I think I'm in love with him. We have everything in common and we spend hours talking. If you read my last post we recently got into argument and this time it hurt like hell and he didn't care. He said a lot of hurtful things even after I told him I was hurt. I let it go and we're back to being best friends. He still does things like tell me I'm beautiful. He loves my body and lets me know all the time even after I had a baby. Obviously it's not a fairytale but it feels like a fairytale sometimes. What makes it work is that we never stays mad for long. I always thought narcissist were really bad people who can barely function? or is a narcissist always really crazy? Even now I'm in denial but there's just no way. The way he talks sometimes though it fit the description perfectly. He treated his ex kind of bad too but I've been with him for like 9 years now. The honeymoon has been over. When he gets angry he says things that shake me mentality,he hates compromise and hates not being in control. I love him and he wants a future kids and life together. I can accept it if he is. Does this man sound like a narcissist and Is there anyway a relationship with a narcissist can work out?
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Reply Tue 24 Jan, 2017 06:20 pm
Post won't delete but i'm starting to think he may not be narcissistic . He's kind of a control freak with our daugher and doesn't compromise well but he'll share the spotlight with her.
Reply Tue 24 Jan, 2017 09:27 pm
He's so insecure that he feels he has to share the spotlight with a baby?


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Reply Wed 1 Feb, 2017 04:21 am
Ask yourself is he trasparent
does he fall out with people alot
does he help with your child or just play with he/she
does he take you out
does he like your family and friends
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Reply Wed 1 Feb, 2017 06:57 am
First of all; there is no such thing as a narcissist.

Actually, there is a DSM category for "narcissism", but if you want to go that route then you would need to take him in to a professional to see if he meets the metric on some scale (and even that isn't very scientifically valid).. Assuming you haven't done that, then wondering if he is a "narcissist" is the same as wondering if he is a "jerk" or an "idiot". It is a silly question.

Is a relationship that you want to be in?. This is the important question, however the difficulty with answering this question is that it puts the responsibility on "you". You have to decide if this is how you want to be treated.

So you have a choice. Stay with him, or don't stay with him. Although, if someone made me feel bad, I wouldn't stay with them for very long. There may be ways to make the relationship better... you could even try couples therapy.

But putting fake psychobabble labels on your boyfriend doesn't help.
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