Re: Husband to Strict?
iluvuandrewjr wrote:I am constantly fighting with my husband because when my son likes to push our buttons I tell him just ignore him because all he wants is a ride out of him but no he always has to yell and scream at him. Well this morning I was having a hard time getting him ready to leave for school and I admit lost my temper (I'm pregnant and hurting) which is no excuse but then my husband flew up the stairs without even saying a word to our son just through him over his shoulder and carried him downstairs of course my son started hysterically screaming and he got so scared ( I think) and upset he peed himself so bad his shoes were soaked so I was late for work anyways. And this isn't the first time every time he does something my husband doesn't like he screams and I just feel our son is scared of him. Plus to make matters worse my husband has only been around him constantly for the past 5 months he's been away in the military for the first 3 1/2 years. Our son doesn't want him to go with us when we go places, I say bubba go wake daddy up no mommy no he says. I am always on my husband's case about this but he says its fine and if our son wants to push his buttons he'll push our sons back. If he's having a wyning fit in a store cause he didn't get something he wanted and starts stomping my husband starts whining loud and does the same I think that is so wrong for our son. How do I get this through to my husband I don't want this pattern to continue with the child I have on the way. I will give him he's never had a father around but he just wont listen and if he does it has to be his way or no way it goes from one extreme to another. If I tell him I don't think what he said or did is good for our son then he says fine I won't say or do anything with him anymore. Please help I'm losing my mind.
Your husband isn't listening to you, so youneed to get someone to talk to your husband who he
will listen to. I feel for you and your son! My 13 year old daughter makes my 5 year old react similarly, but she has never made him so scared he peed himself.
She, at least, does listen to me, but has trouble altering her behavior and tends to bully and instill fear to gain control of situations with her younger brother and sister. It isn't a particularly effective tactic, I have pointed out time and again, but by now, they don't like her and don't respond when she tries the gentler approaches I have recommended and her father has recommended, so she falls back on bullying and intimidation unless she is monitored constantly. I'm not sure what can be said to motivate your husband to change his tactics... perhaps a parenting class...???
Best of luck! ANd, welcome to a2k! ~ Aloha, PP
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