Please review my college application essay. This is my first draft so it is rough)

I am a senior in public school and a first generation future college student trying to get into an IVY league school. This essay will definitely effect that so if you choose to critique it, please be throughout. A reply would be greatly appreciated.

Common App #4 Prompt
Problem: Over treating and under treating mental illnesses

Restless, I am sitting in a doctor's office silently while my mom chats up the doctor. I don't understand why I'm here, but I don't have to because my mom does. The doctor´s brows raised and fell with the pitch of my mom's voice, she threw her hands around angrily. It was in that moment that I knew something was wrong with me.
I didn’t understand why I had gone to the doctor’s that day in the first grade until I was entering my first year of middle school. No one had explained to me why I took pills and why they made me feel empty inside. I was prescribed medication for Attention Deficit Disorder. ¨You need to listen Ashley, why do you never listen?¨ is the most memorable phrase from my childhood. They say what your parents tell you when you are younger becomes the voice inside your head.
It is the sixth grade and I have been off Ritalin for four years. I am now an honor student. I still feel empty inside. I don't sleep much. The doctor asks me if I´ve ever had suicidal thoughts or feelings. My mom is staring at me, I lie and say ¨of course not.¨
It's the end of 8th grade year and I am crying in front of a sink. The third panic attack this week. I´m holding a knife and in it I see my reflection, but it doesn't look like me. I´m scared of the stranger I see in the mirror. My face is hot and my stomach hurts, I can't see anything through the tears now. I´m about to murder myself. Out of impulse and desperation I run downstairs and throw myself onto my parent´s bed. My dad and step-mom look at me sympathetically and ask me what I'm doing. It´s hard to reply because it all just hit me that I'm sitting on my parents bed crying instead of lying unconsciously on a bathroom floor bleeding. I'm more uncomfortable in this situation than I would be in the one I planned for. I suck my tears inside and casually tell them that I think something may be wrong with me. They're both irritated by the lack of explanation so I force out more words hoping they´ll understand, ¨I think I may be sick, like maybe, depressed?.¨ The voice in my head punishes me by telling me how pathetic and ridiculous I am. My heart is hoping though that they believe me. My dad laughs and tells me this is normal for someone my age and sends me upstairs. The next day everyone but me acts normal. The cup is half empty but it has the potential to be full someday.
I´m about to start my senior year. I distanced myself from my dad more and my mom and I don´t talk, but it's better this way. I´m starting to make decisions for the better of myself. I´m mad at the child I use to be because she didn't plan to me someday. I don't sleep very much still but that means I have more time to paint and read. I´ve been planning more for the future lately, in a good way. Psychology is so interesting, the more I learn about it the more I learn about myself. I want to go to college and earn a doctorate in it, as well as in myself. I feel less empty inside, an improvement!
A child doesn't know how to express themselves. I was forced to receive help for a problem I didn't have while my real problem was neglected. I had been angry at my parents and arrogantly blamed everyone around me. I know enough now to be understanding. I learned the hard way that change starts with you. I like helping people with their problems, I like being there to tell them that I believe them. I didn´t go back up to that bathroom and kill myself that night, but not everyone is like me. Strong communication between psychologists, doctors, and patients could save a life.