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I can't decide between 2 colleges.

 
 
Reply Fri 23 Apr, 2021 08:41 am
Hi, I'm a high school senior who has to decide what college I want to attend in a little over a week. Just for some background about myself: I'm from NYC, food is very important to me, I'm an introvert, and I've wanted to become a doctor ever since I was a kid.

So the 2 schools I can't choose between are Binghamton and the University of Rochester. Both are in NY and have my intended major, so no problem there. But UOR has a med school, has more of a city environment (which means they also have more food choices) and seems "prettier" than Bing (imo). On the other hand, I would know more people at Bing (although idk if I would really connect with them) and my bf is set on going there. My relationship with my bf is a long one, since we've known each other since elementary school. We only started dating in Feb, but since then we've been growing closer (only in an online setting though.)

The thing with med school though is even if I go to UOR, I would still apply for med schools elsewhere (esp closer to home.) And with location, yeah UOR might be a better fit, but I'm more of a homebody, so I question whether I'd be adventuring off campus that much in the first place.

It's just my own "vibe" I get, but I feel like UOR would give me a better education. I'm not sure if this is correct, so please lmk if that is valid or not. But there's still something in me that can't choose between the 2 colleges. If anyone out there has some more info on either school, that'd be great. But I could really use some advice, if not your own opinion of where I should go. (Of course the final decision is mine, but I just want to know what others think.)
 
engineer
 
  4  
Reply Fri 23 Apr, 2021 09:02 am
@Erdbeere,
In surveys with new college graduates, the overwhelming majority felt they went to the "right" school whether they went to the small, expensive, private college or Big State U. Most accredited schools will give you a good education and the opportunity for a "good" college experience. So don't overthink it, both schools will probably work great for you so go with your gut or go with the school that gives you the best financial package or whatever else works for you personally. There is not a wrong decision between these two schools.
jespah
 
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Reply Fri 23 Apr, 2021 09:34 am
@engineer,
To add to what engineer said:
  • Go where you can incur the least amount of debt. You're shooting for zero.
  • Go to the school with the better placement program for what you want. If you want to go to grad school, then that's the metric -- what percentage of graduates in your field were accepted to grad school (and where)? If you want to work right out of school, then the metric comes from placement. Either way, get information on the placement office. In many schools, even expensive ones, placement is an afterthought. You'll be a student there for less than a decade. You'll be working for a good 4 or 5 decades. Placement matters.
  • Don't go to school to follow a relationship unless it's at the level of engagement, living together, you're parents together, or you're married. I am talking about a serious commitment here, and did you notice I didn't mention love? Following a relationship that isn't 100% solid is a recipe for agita. The corollary to this is that (a) you need to have the time to study and (b) it's hard to beat being apart to determine if your relationship is the real deal.
  • Go where you can get the best grades and/or the place with the better reputation. Of course if you can get both, then that's golden. For your first few years in the workforce, grades and school reputation will loom large to employers. Since neither of these are Ivy League (which trumps anything else in terms of reputation), you need to understand which has the better local reputation for wherever you want to work/settle. Going to the best, most respected school in upstate NY is probably not going to mean much if you go to work in Iowa.
  • Go where there is a large variety of things you can study (these schools probably both fill the bill in that area). This is a fallback in case you change your mind on your course of study, and it opens you up to other areas of scholarship. Even the most diehard ballet major should take something like geology (for example).
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Linkat
 
  2  
Reply Fri 23 Apr, 2021 10:09 am
@Erdbeere,
How exciting this must be for you. I have two daughters one just graduating from college this year and the other graduating from high school and will onto college in the fall like you.

Speaking from their experiences – my older daughter is an introvert and a homebody like you. She decided to actually spread her wings and travel over a 10 hour drive to college. It has been her best experience – although still an introvert she opened up more – she did not know anyone at the college she went to. When we visited the campus she just knew this was the one for her.

I think you should go with your instincts. From what I read you seem to like UOR better. As long as the school you choose is strong academically for what you want to pursue – pick the one that “feels” better to you. I would caution you against choosing a school for a friend or friends or even a boyfriend. If your relationship is meant to be it will last. However, because at this time in your life you discover and change a lot, many relationships (whether it be friends or boyfriends) end. I am not saying yours will, but many do. In my daughter’s situation with all the new friends she made at college many had boyfriends – I believe all are no longer together except one couple. Again this does not mean you two will split, just it is a possibility and you would not want to pick one school over another for that reason or for the reason of a friend or friends.

This is your time to start a new chapter and sometimes not knowing anyone is the best way. You will meet people through orientation and other ways. Most schools pull together games, functions, etc for the incoming freshman class to help them make these new bonds.

Also you do not make mention of money! College is a big expense and so you should consider that in as well – meaning if you are deciding by two and one would save in a good amount then I would lean that way especially if med school is in your future. As far as which school is better academically for what you want to do – I would refer you to your guidance counselor they are in the best position for that. Like I said if both are strong academically I would choose the what “feels” good to you – you will not just be taking classes but being part of that community. My daughter actually chose a school that was very good academically for her major and turned down one that was a little stronger academically because she knew this school fit her overall.

And good luck and congratulations – this is such an exciting time for you fully grasp it! As a mom, I am happy for you!
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Mame
 
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Reply Sun 25 Apr, 2021 04:47 pm
Excellent advice from everyone. I hope you let us know what you decide.
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Erdbeere
 
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Reply Mon 26 Apr, 2021 10:18 am
Hi everyone, thank you so much for the advice, it really helped and gave me confidence in making my decision. I’ve decided on Binghamton! I’ve given more thought about the financial aspect of things, and going here would save me a bit of money. I was also able to visit both colleges. Although the UOR was a beautiful place, seeing it in person was pretty different than the videos, and it turns out it didn’t fit my preferences.
Once again, thank you for taking the time to reply and caring about my worries. I’ll remember your kindness throughout my next 4 years at Bing and beyond!
Linkat
 
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Reply Mon 26 Apr, 2021 10:22 am
@Erdbeere,
Erdbeere wrote:

Hi everyone, thank you so much for the advice, it really helped and gave me confidence in making my decision. I’ve decided on Binghamton! I’ve given more thought about the financial aspect of things, and going here would save me a bit of money. I was also able to visit both colleges. Although the UOR was a beautiful place, seeing it in person was pretty different than the videos, and it turns out it didn’t fit my preferences.
Once again, thank you for taking the time to reply and caring about my worries. I’ll remember your kindness throughout my next 4 years at Bing and beyond!


Good for you - had no idea you did not visit - I don't know how someone could make a decision like that without visiting the campus first and ideally talking with some students, teachers, or any others like coaches, and other people of interest. I know some people do - I have heard of a handful that went to school sight unseen - but you really cannot get a feel without at the very least visiting the campus.
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